Dr. Seuss Is a Total Buzz Killington

When you run a minor league baseball team, you must resort to silly, lowest-common-denominator promotions and antics to attempt to fill the seats. It comes with the territory. For example, at Charlotte Knights games they have the Pizza Scream. In between innings, they throw some seizure-inducing graphic on the jumbotron, encouraging fans to scream for pizza. Hence the name Pizza Scream. Whichever section screams the loudest gets free pizza coupons. It’s hands down the most exciting part of the games.

Annnyway. The Padres Class A affiliate, the Lake Elsinore Storm (best. uniforms. ever.), decided to have a promotion of its own centered around Dr. Seuss. There would be green eggs and ham at the concession stands (sounds, um, delicious), Seuss related skits on the field, and the players were to wear green and red stripped socks. Not so fast, Storm. Apparently Dr. Seuss isn’t all about fun and games as we’d previously been lead to believe:

But then came a cease-and-desist letter late last week from Dr. Seuss Enterprises, saying the promotion would steal its intellectual property. To allow the promotion to go forward, Dr. Seuss Enterprises wanted a $1,000 one-time license fee, a rewritten insurance policy that covered Dr. Seuss and a $4,000 security deposit to use official Seuss character costumes from the company's La Jolla office. Dr. Seuss Enterprises instructed the Storm that it wasn't allowed to use any “Cat in the Hat” costumes obtained independently.

The team issued a response to Dr. Seuss in the only appropriate manner. Check it out after the jump:

The Padres affiliate, the Lake Elsinore Storm
Tried to put on a promotion that wasn't the Norm
We called it Dr. Seuss Night on our website
But something about that didn't seem right
Dr. Seuss Enterprises didn't see it as funny
They said we could do it, but we didn't have the money They didn't appreciate our publicity ploys
So we have to inform all the sad girls and boys
Through the face of it all we thought we'd persist
Until we were served with a cease and desist
The theme has been canceled, but the game will go on Perhaps it wouldn't matter if we were in Taiwan.”

But hey, it’s not all bad for Storm fans. The team will still be having Fat Tuesdays every week. For just $13, fans can enjoy “an all-you-can-eat buffet that includes hot dogs, tacos, chips and salsa and canned soda.” Both nutritious and delicious.

(H/T: Cherry Picking)

This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.