Wild Speculation: Jarrod Washburn

Welcome to "Wild Speculation." Over the next three days leading up to the MLB trade deadline, SN's David Arnott will use this space to speculate over possible deals. And do so wildly.

Jarrod Washburn used to be a decent pitcher. Won a ring with the Halos, then took the cash money from the Mariners to play second fiddle to King Felix. Now, he's that guy with trend-o-scruff who pitches when Felix and Bedard aren't being good and Carlos Silva isn't sucking as only Carlos Silva can. Pass the Ichi Rolls. In any event, several teams are vying for his services during Deadline Crunch 2008. Which destination makes the most sense for our intrepid lefty?

THE EAST RIVER
The New York Yankees have expressed interest in Washburn. This is a little puzzling coming from Brian Cashman, normally a shrewd decision maker, because Washburn would bring instant shame upon die hard Yankees fans who've already been through so much suffering in their fandom. Dude barely has a 2/1 K/BB ratio, and he's giving up more line drives than he has in any other season. Yeah, he's better than Sidney Ponson, but being happy about acquiring a guy who's better than Sir Sidney is kind of like patting yourself on the back for eating a carrot three days into a Whopper binge. Melky Cabrera's been mentioned in reports about the potential trade, but Cashman would be out of his mind to make that deal. The Yanks should offer up what's left of John Sterling's dignity and hope the Mariners don't demand more.

GATEWAY ARCH
The Cardinals recently gave away Anthony Reyes for one Double-A player, a decision they'll come to regret if it means they have to give up something of value for Washburn. If the Cards are going to catch the Brew Crew or the Cubs, though, the starting rotation is as good a place as any to improve, seeing as it's somewhat doubtful that Joel Pineiro knows he's supposed to make batters miss his pitches. Again, they'd rightfully be roasted if they gave up someone like Colby Rasmus. Instead, I propose they trade a couple toasted ravioli and assume that no one else in the majors will have the guts to match their offer.

But, really, there's only one place for Washburn to go...

MT. RAINIER
He's in the place where he truly belongs. Let's face it: Washburn won't find a better home for his style of pitching than Safeco and its cavernous left field. He gets a lot of fly balls and doesn't really get strikeouts, so he needs his ballpark to support him. Rock on, Trend-o-Scruff. Rock on.

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