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Updated throughout the day with quick takes from staff.

Morning Constitutional: ESPN Is Hip

ESPN Employs MC Hammer ... | Awful Announcing
The Worldwide Leader knows what's cool with the kids these days: Hammer Time, duh. Without exaggeration, this has to be the worst ESPN commercial of all-time:

Forget About The Phelps Diet. Try The Blogger Diet. | Don Chavez
This is how we keep our sexy physique. (Warning: link contains some half-nude women.)

A Glass Joe Imitation for the Ages | Deuce of Davenport
Unfortunately, only one of these righteously annoying brahs gets knocked out. That's better than nothing, though.

Dreadlock Deadlock Ends, Sort Of | Fan IQ
I'm still not sure why Manny is required to cut his hair, but he complied. Sort of.

Brewers tattoo comes skimmin' through rays of violet | BLS
"Even people who aren't fans of the Dead seem to like it although i don't think they understand the concept of it." I don't understand the concept of it.

This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.

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Maybe it’s ‘cause I’m from the Bay Area, but Hammer has been and always will be cool, and you can’t convince me otherwise. He’s making a comeback of sorts, I tell you. Check it out: He’s performing at one of the world’s premiere folk/bluegrass festivals!

You can’t make this stuff up.

by darnott on Aug 15, 2008 12:48 PM EDT reply actions  

Regardless of Hammer’s level of coolness, the commercial still sucks.

by cmottram on Aug 15, 2008 1:33 PM EDT reply actions  

Hey, with the tattoo, I might be taking you too literally re: not understanding the concept, but it’s the Grateful Dead "Steal Your Face" logo. I have no idea of the history of it, but it’s all over the place with Deadheads. "Steal your face" is from a lyric from some song they do, as is "skimming through rays of violet," which is from Sugar Magnolia (I thought it was "streaming," but what do I know?). That’s the general idea – a true Deadhead could tell you a lot more about this, probably very slowly, while eating and constantly losing his train of thought.   

by William1865 on Aug 15, 2008 2:29 PM EDT reply actions  

Yeah, I’m familiar with the Dead logo. I’m just not sure I understand what the Brewers have to do with the Dead. Unless it was simply, "hey, I like the Brewers and the Dead, let’s combine the two!" But when someone implies that people might not understand the concept, then I’m foced to assume it’s more meaningful than that.

by cmottram on Aug 15, 2008 2:33 PM EDT reply actions  

Gotcha – actually, it was probably the "hey, I like the Brewers and the Dead…" thing. The space in the top of the SYF where the lightning bolt is lends itself to all sorts of combinations (I went to school in Georgia, I saw it a few times with a peach).

by William1865 on Aug 15, 2008 3:18 PM EDT reply actions  

My brother hired Hammer to do a promotional magazine ad for his company… it cost him $100 and lunch.

by L'etat, c'est moi on Aug 15, 2008 9:25 PM EDT reply actions  

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