Road to Game Day: Week 3, Tempe

Words by Keith Arnold, who is touring the country with his brother Phil as they invade a different college campus each Saturday during the football season. They’ll be reporting back in this space with their various adventures. You can also keep tabs on their vagabonding over at RoadtoGameDay.com. This weekend, they were in Tempe for the Georgia-Arizona St. game



So we survived our first football game in the Sahara. I have no idea how people can actually live in Arizona. If it’s late September and it’s over 100 degrees, you shouldn’t be living there, and you definitely shouldn’t be going to a football game there. It was so hot on Saturday, that the powers that govern these type of events didn’t even allow tailgaters into the parking lot until 1:30 pm, a mere 3.5 hours before kickoff. (Florida fans had already had a 12 pack and switched into their 2nd tank top and pair of jean shorts by then.) If it were possible to just take a bath in Gold Bond medicated powder, I would’ve done it.

At one point Saturday afternoon, Team RTGD reached a low-point for morale. We had walked the wrong way around “A” mountain, and realized we needed to double back twenty minutes to get to the primo tailgating lot where we were supposed to be meeting people. It felt like we were on the Oregon Trail, and we just had two Oxen die, our wagon tipped as we attempted to ford a river, and Phil went down with dysentery.

But with the help of a bike taxi, we dropped the best $20 of the weekend and made our way around the mountain and into Lot 59. Even if it was 102 degrees outside, Sun Devil fans we’re still partying and trying to convince themselves that they had a chance against the vaunted Bulldogs. I’m not sure what’s less intelligent, binge drinking in the desert, or thinking that ASU could hang with Georgia (I was guilty of both).

Let’s get the tough part out of the way. Arizona State football fans suck. At one point in the afternoon, I started asking ASU fans actual football questions, and most of them knew next to nothing about their team. You know your fanbase isn’t quite rabid when they agree that Rod Tidwell was going to have a really good season this year. While the stadium was pretty loud, and it’s an impressive feat of endurance to watch any football game in that heat, the stadium was inundated with Georgia fans (many of whom had to buy season tickets just to get tickets for the game) and we got two very good seats for less than face value.

But here’s the good part. The girls of ASU are incredible. If I had the space, I could present you Exhibit A through Z to support this statement. And the guys of ASU do their best Kevin Federline impression, which is equal part riveting and embarrassing. I started to worry if maybe I missed an inside joke shared by like 5,000 college guys who joined the facebook group “Dress like a Douche. Go Sun Devils!”

The Road to Game Day is seeking refuge in milder climates … like Athens, Georgia for the epic showdown between the Bulldogs and the Crimson Tide this Saturday. Phil is growing his bangs long and bushy for the occasion, and I’m stopping at the Polo outlets for a nice crisp, pastel oxford shirt to wear with my khaki shorts. If there were a big game between the Nanooks of Alaska-Fairbanks and the Seawolves of Alaska-Anchorage, we’d be there this week, as the heat is absolutely killing us. So as the calendar turns to the first day of Autumn, let the fall weather begin.

This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.