TSB in Tampa: Where Jersey Etiquette Dies

Chris Mottram is on the loose in ↵Tampa this week. He'll be posting about various goodness and ↵misadventures here on no particular schedule.
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With Radio Row on a continual flatline today, I’ve spent plenty of the afternoon outside, roaming the Media Center’s surrounding area in hopes of finding something -- anything --- of interest. (Seriously: During my two Super Bowl weeks combined, today is the most boring of them all. I even broke down and went to a press conference. I never do that, and was reminded why about 10 minutes into it.) ↵

↵What I ended up discovering were culprits committing crimes against fashion so malicious that there simply aren’t enough pink-feathered handcuffs on earth for Tim Gunn to lock them all up. The government should send astrophysicists to Tampa, stat, to study the mysterious gravitational pull that has created a black hole of horrible jersey fashion in this area. It’s truly uncanny. Before I show you specific examples of what I’m talking about, allow us to review the basic man-rules of wearing jerseys. ↵

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↵1. Thou shall not wear the jersey of a player who is no longer with the franchise, unless said player is universally consider to be a legend and is retired.
↵2. Thou shall never, under any circumstances, tuck in a jersey.
↵3. Thou shall not wear a jersey with any pants other than jeans. (Clarification: FULL LENGTH jeans -- no jorts or shants permitted.)
↵4. Thou shall not wear mandels with the jersey -- or at any other time, ever, for that matter.
↵5. Thou shall not wear a jersey at any time other than during a game in which the team the jersey represents is participating. So, wearing a jersey in public the Wednesday before a Super Bowl is questionable to start with. ↵

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↵Alright, now that we’re clear, let’s go to the photographic evidence. Also worth noting: I failed to spot one single person who didn’t break at least one of rules 1-4, as stated above. ↵

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↵(Despite tucking the jersey into shorts, that last guy scores points for a) Going with a Pat Tillman jersey; b) Being the first Cardinals fan I've spotted all week, thus proving their existence outside of Will Leitch.) ↵

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↵UPDATE: Here's a couple more violators to add to the list, spotted on my way out of the Media Center today.
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This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.

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