Tiger Woods' Car Accident: BIZARRE

Just for the record, let’s look at the Tiger Woods car accident that apparently has him in “serious condition” right now. Or, maybe he’s fine. Depends on who you ask, I suppose. What do we know so far?

Apparently, Woods pulled out of his driveway and hit a fire hydrant and then a tree. Still, no airbags deployed and he was presumably going at modest speed, so… How could he have possibly suffered “serious” injuries from that accident alone? And what “charges” are pending if it was a fender bender with a fire hydrant and a neighborhood tree? Not to go all CONSPIRACY theorist on you, but it just doesn’t make sense.

Or, if he did suffer the injuries in the accident, how could it possibly have happened with him sober and coherent? It is pretty damn difficult to hit a fire hydrant and THEN hit a tree on a different person’s property. Although if you’re drunk or otherwise impaired, it’s much easier. And who leaves the house at 2:30 am on Thanksgiving night?

So what’s going on here? Too early to tell, but right now, the facts just don’t add up.

UPDATE: Care to further muddle the picture? Why, let's consult the National Enquirer!