â†µAs this article reminds you, Zidane smoked like a Chinese chemical plant throughout his career. (The article is also a reminder that while the UK and the US both speak English, there are substantial and important differences in usage.) So has the Nationals' Scott Olsen, a pack-a-day nicotine fiend who has nevertheless managed to maintain a promising career as a major league pitcher. Like you, he smokes more if he starts mixing the magical duo of beer and cigarettes. Unlike you, he can do this and still be effective. â†µâ†µ
â†µâ‡¥Scott Olsen pulled out a cigarette, one of the dozen he allows himself every day, though sometimes, with a beer or two, he'll smoke a few more. He tried to quit on his 25th birthday, in January, but that didn't work. Now he's thinking he'll give up the habit only when his girlfriend gets pregnant. â†µâ‡¥â†µTo be fair, Zidane's accomplishment is far freakier in terms of human anatomy. Zidane had to run miles a day as a soccer player; Olsen has to pitch, a far less strenuous physical task than playing midfield at the highest professional levels. Olsen also fits into the grand tradition of beer-drinking, cigarette-smoking baseball slouches like Mark Grace, who attributed much of his longevity as a major leaguer to smoking, donut consumption, and the special magic of the slumpbuster. â†µ
â†µâ‡¥"I just have to get motivated," Olsen said. â†µâ‡¥â†µ
â†µIt's not that smoking, drinking, and taking terrible care of yourself are a good idea for anyone. It's just another example of how winning the genetic lottery of being athletically talented cuts you yet another break in life: even vices take a smaller bite out of them than they do out of a normal schlub such as yourself. (Especially if you play baseball, a sport of hand-eye coordination where the lungs can take long, luxurious breaks in between plays.) â†µâ†µ
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