Did Nats Fans Send Sox Fans to Gay Bars?

Here in Washington, everyone knew that this week would be among the most depressing weeks of the year. The Nationals have the worst record in the Major Leagues. They have shaky attendance that's threatening to descend into the realm of the embarrassing; 27th in the majors, in the second year of their new ballpark. And the Red Sox were coming to town for the first time since the early '70s, coming to a region lousy with New England transplants who realized they have just the perfect pastel ballcap for this occasion. ↵

↵The early results were about as dreary as you'd expect; estimates of the crowd ran from 65-35 to 80-20 to 99.7-0.03, and the Nats were pummeled as the visitors chanted "Let's Go Red Sox" and drank our beer. ↵

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↵A few Nats fans got back as only the downtrodden can: with potentially offensive guerrilla Internet humor. ↵

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↵"Hi Everyone, I'm coming in this week for the Sox series. Are there any decent sportsbars near the ballpark?" one apparent Red Sox fan asked on the Nats' online forum. ↵

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↵"There's only a beer garden next to the park," replied one famously instigator from the team's boards. "you're better off up the street on Capitol Hill, Remingtons (639 Pennsylvania Ave SE) is a NE Patriots bar so they'll probably have a large Red Sox crowd this week." ↵

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↵If you have a well-developed sense of skepticism, here's where you might start to doubt this story. ↵

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↵Because a quick trip to Remington's Web site reveals nothing about the Patriots or the Red Sox, and not a word about Big Papi's magnificence or Bill Simmons's wit, but plenty of photos of guys wearing cowboy hats accompanying men in drag, Remington's being D.C.'s most famous Western-themed gay bar. ↵

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↵Of course, there's a proud tradition of straight folks in D.C. heading to Remington's for some red-hot spurs-and-chaps filled hetero line-dancing, but your typical dude wearing a Green Monstah t-shirt under his Pedroia jersey might not be in the mood. And naturally, another Nats fan recommended a nearby establishment, "which I think all Boston fans will feel very comfortable in," which turned out to be one of D.C.'s best-known lesbian hangouts. If you believe anonymous Internet handles, at least one of the Red Sox fans went to Remington's, pounded a drink and hit the road. ↵

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↵So, is this progressive humor? Is it a substitute for a winning ballclub? Is it even believable? Likely not, to all three. But in a week like this, it'll have to suffice for D.C. sports fans. ↵

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This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.

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