â†µOh, who are we kidding? This is the â†µinternet. Time-wasting is what we do best.
â†µAnyway, LiveSports â†µhas found a study by Spanish researchers confirming what we already â†µknow: sitting on a seat that puts all your weight on the taint and virtually jams "Big Hoss and The Roundballs" back into your abdomen â†µis bad for the li'l swimmers: â†µ
â†µâ‡¥Spanish researchers have found that active male cyclists have â†µâ‡¥lower quality sperm to the point of infertility risk. Among other â†µâ‡¥things, they blame the painful "function over form" design â†µâ‡¥of the wedge bicycle seat.â†µThe study, which was headed â†µby a woman, found a "statistically adverse correlation â†µbetween sperm morphology and the volume of cycling training â†µundertaken per week," which is to say the more time spent â†µrigorously exercising atop the Crotch Killer, the worse the structure â†µof your salt babies becomes. And if it's bad for babymaking, it's â†µnecessarily bad for the continuation of the human species.
â†µâ‡¥The good news is that unless you're training to be in the next â†µâ‡¥Tour de France with Lance Armstrong, your time on the saddle â†µâ‡¥shouldn't do any long-term damage. â†µ
â†µThe â†µonly reasonable solution is clear: ban all bicycles until each and â†µevery one of them is better tailored to anatomical reality. â†µAnything less is tantamount to treason against Pubesylvania, its Six Inch Governor and its Hairy Treasury Department.â†µ
This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.