Lebron's Mom Says He's Staying in Cleveland

OMG Knicks fans - Lebron Jame's mother said the Global Icon won't be setting up shop in New York anytime soon. According to the Sporting News, James' mother Gloria told a Knicks fan at a book signing that James is "a hometown boy."

For the moment, let's set aside whether this actually means anything. Let's panic, Knicks fans. Sure, there will be plenty of other premier free agents available next summer - Dwyane Wade, Amare Stoudemire, and Chris Bosh among others - but none of them are good enough to single-handedly carry a team like Lebron can. Look at the Cavaliers last year: Mo Williams is a solid point guard, but as a second option on a team, he's overmatched; Zydrunas Ilgauskus is on his last legs; Anderson Varejao is a glorified flop artist and hustle player. Minus Lebron, that would have been one of the worst teams in the league. And yet The King carried them to the best record in the league, and masked their considerable weaknesses until the Magic exposed them in the conference finals. 

Knicks fans better hope Lebron ends up telling his mom what's what about him potentially leaving for New York, just like he did back in the playoffs a few years back. Otherwise, feel free to light yourselves on fire Knicks fans.