The Powerpoint Presentation Behind LeBron James' Full Court Birthday Celebration™

LeBron James turns 26 years old next week, and to celebrate, he's doing exactly what you'd expect him to do. Which is to say, hosting a lavish party and courting sponsors to spend anywhere from $10,000 to $500,000 to help fund the festivities.

Global icon, son!

It's part of a larger party tour being conducted by LeBron and his entourage. The LeBron James Dinner Party Tour includes stops all over the country and offers guests the chance to dine exclusively with LeBron James and the marketing masterminds that have taken his brand right to the very top. (For more information, see Slide 12 at the end.)

Now, Yahoo! Sports' Adrian Wojnarowski structured an entire column around Bron's foray into party planning and the deeper messages it sends ("LeBron throws some mean parties, and the AAU NBA loves him for it."). But we're not going to do that. Instead of mining any Big Messages, we'll let Power Point talk for us. Business Insider uncovered the presentation Bron's people used to woo sponsors, and... Well, it's pretty magnificent.

You can admire the slides below, or, if you're looking for a cliff's notes version, here's a collection of words that Bron's team wanted to emphasize. Each of these words appears in bold:

Official ... LeBron James 12.30.10 ... Celebrity Lounge ... Coco De Ville ... Gansevoort Hotel ... LeBron James and friends ... Star studded ... Elite ... Royal themed ... Extravagant ... Swag bags ... A-list sponsors ... Sultry ... Extravagant gatherings ... VIP seating ... Intimate vibe ... 50,000+ elite ... athletes ... Affluent leaders ...  A-list crowd ... Savvy trendsetters ... chic lifestye ... Brand awareness ... Marketing and media campaigns ... Local and national radio ... Product endorsement ... Sampling and product distribution ... Customized activation opportunities ... VIP hospitality ... Venue signage ... publicity and media ... Enhance media ... Association with a LeBron James event ... Every Sunday through 2011 ... LeBron James and friends.

Star-divide

And thanks to Business Insider, here are the slides...

Slide 1: Half court was last year, yo. EYES ON THE PRIZE NOW.

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Slide 2: Do you like Red Carpet Events with elite chic star studded celebrities?

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Slide 3: What you know about channeling some extravagant ambience?

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Slide 4: "Extravagant celebration with an intimate VIP vibe" means "no broke mothaf****s necessary".

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Slide 5: Demographic? "50,000+ elite" means "No broke mothaf****s necessary!!"

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Sldie 6: Uh-oh, y'all. Somebody took a marketing class!

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Slide 7: "Who wants VIP Hospitality? 'Cause we want $10,000."

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Slide 8: "Involvement with this happening" ... Is Bron's birthday a Global Event that defies explanation? Come to think of it: LeBron and M. Night Shyamalan are definitely friends, right? "Signs was so dope!!!"

Lebronpowerpoint8_medium

Slide 9: Supper club? ... Who calls it supper and not dinner? Oh. People from Cleveland.

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Slide 10: That club where they're having the party? Yep, it's a club.

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Slide 11: ...All this and more, coming to a crowded night club near you!

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On a more serious note, if Maverick Carter is looking for a way to monetize this little cross-country charade of chic nightlife, he should just make LeBron James Buzzword Mad Libs.

We already have a word bank:

Official ... LeBron James 12.30.10 ... Celebrity Lounge ... Coco De Ville ... Gansevoort Hotel ... LeBron James and friends ... Star studded ... Elite ... Royal themed ... Extravagant ... Swag bags ... A-list sponsors ... Sultry ... Extravagant gatherings ... VIP seating ... Intimate vibe ... 50,000+ elite ... athletes ... Affluent leaders ...  A-list crowd ... Savvy trendsetters ... chic lifestye ... Brand awareness ... Marketing and media campaigns ... Local and national radio ... Product endorsement ... Sampling and product distribution ... Customized activation opportunities ... VIP hospitality ... Venue signage ... publicity and media ... Enhance media ... Association with a LeBron James event ... Every Sunday through 2011 ... LeBron James and friends.

So let's try a quick mad lib...

This is it, the big ________ . Look around at the ______ with all this ______ and tell me you don't want to _______ . Is this your first experience with ________ ? I love ________ . It reminds of this one time when I had a(n) ________  ________ and first got _______ . Life is a rich carnival, ya know? Just _______ , ________ , and ________ ! We should do this with ________ .

Ok, now here's my first try:

This is it, the big Celebrity Lounge. Look around at the swag bags with all this brand awareness and tell me you don't want savvy trendsetters. Is this your first experience with sampling and product distribution? I love intimate vibes. It reminds of this one time when I had VIP seating enhance my media and first got royal themed. Life's a rich carnival, ya know? Just sultry, brand awareness, and association with a LeBron James event! We should do this with 50,000+ elite!

One more time?

This is it, the big marketing and media campaigns. Look around at the local and national radio with all this venue signage and tell me you don't want to customize activation opportunities. Is this your first experience with Coco De Ville? I love product endorsement. It reminds of this one time when I had a swag bag product endorsement and first got LeBron James and friends. Life is a rich carnival, ya know? Just chic lifestyle and sultry sampling and product distribution! We should do this with A-list sponsors

I'm tellin' ya, Mav—LeBron's Marketing Mad Libs would be the BEST. You could finally go GLOBAL.

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