Tiger Woods Saga Gets Mocked on TV, Chided in Print ... Again

There has been a lot of reaction to the news that Tiger Woods is coming back to the the PGA Tour at the Masters. So much reaction that some national media voices probably found it rather difficult to type out their thoughts, what with all the hand wringing going on. But let's focus first on how TV is covering the news. ESPN had wall-to-wall-to-ceiling-to-floor coverage of the news, including a press release about televising the first two days of the Masters that, if you squint while reading, you can almost see the words jump off the page and high-five each other.

Sean McManus, CBS News and Sports president, told reporters that he thinks Tiger's return will be the biggest media event "other than the Obama inauguration in the last 10 or 15 years." It doesn't hurt, of course, that McManus said this less than a day before Woods announced he be coming back to a tournament that's televised by CBS. Now all Woods has to do is make the cut and – imagine if he's in contention – CBS will do a Super Bowl-like number…for golf.

The timing of Tiger's announcement could not have been better for the folks at South Park, who spent their season premiere discussing, and obviously mocking, Tiger's "transgressions" (with a graphic, violent scene and NSFW language -- it's not for the faint of heart).

There is a saturation point, and a time when a story gets completely over-covered to the level where everything anyone says is just noise and all you can do is laugh. South Park clearly realizes this. Some American sports columnists…not so much.

The day the news broke that Tiger was coming back, I turned on ESPN for a minute to get a pulse of the coverage. Bad timing on my part, as the pulse I got was a hot-and-bothered Bill Plaschke talking about how selfish Tiger was being for coming back at the Masters. In the LA Times the next day, Plaschke continued that thought:

The Masters tournament is one of the last sports events that is bigger than any of the athletes who compete there. Woods' comeback will completely swallow it.

Forget the green jacket. The only article of clothing that will concern anyone will be something worn by Tiger Woods' wife Elin, if she attends.

Which she won't, but he couldn't think of a better line to fit in 'green jacket' so he went with it anyway. His entire column is based on the assertion that nobody will care about the pageantry of the Masters because they'll be so focused on Woods. How it's all that different than any other year, I'm still not really sure. Of course, that's nothing compared to the lede of the New York Daily News story by Matthew Lysiak and Corky Siemaszko today:

Hide your daughters - Tiger Woods is coming to town.

A day after Woods announced he was ending his exile from golf and playing next month in the Masters Tournament, some folks in Augusta, Ga., weren't pleased at the prospect of seeing the sex scandal-stained superstar traipsing through the city.

"There isn't a respectable parent of a teenage daughter within 10 miles who can feel safe with Tiger Woods coming to town," said Jim Searan, 43, a dad with 12- and 16-year-old daughters.

"You see, because the man's an addict. He can't control himself. He could be having sex with my wife and kids right now while I'm talking to you." It's an amazingly wonderful job by the DN reporters to start their story by talking to a resident who wants to protect his 12- and 16-year old daughters from Woods, thus insinuating that he is not only a sex addict, but also an uncontrollable pedophile.

To their credit, the paper also quoted women of the town – including those who work at a Hooters restaurant – to talk about how excited they are to have him back in the area.

Yet nothing takes the Tiger Woods Indignation Cake – you can taste the righteousness – like Stephen A. Smith's column in the Philadelphia Inquirer today. Smith seems very angry that Woods will be allowed to start his season at Augusta without having to answer questions from the likes of Stephen A Smith.

If Woods is never required to answer questions, how precedent-setting is that? What's to stop the next high-profile athlete from doing the same? And where will that leave the fathers, mothers, and guardians when they are left seeking that all-important accountability as it pertains to the modern-day athlete?

Yes, folks. Tiger Woods has to answer to sports writers about his personal life while playing in a golf tournament ... for the children. Has anyone thought about the guardians? What will the guardians tell their kids about that all-important accountability? Where will that leave them?

Oh, it gets better. Watch as Stephen A. plays Tiger Woods Accountability Ping Pong with himself:

This is not about Tiger Woods winning the Masters. This is about his showing up to begin the process of resurrecting his image.

But how can Woods be allowed to do that when he refuses to legitimately address his off-course issues?

Everyone should recognize that Woods' adulterous affairs and his relationship with his wife are absolutely none of our business, but there are still some legitimate questions to ask.

Smith poses three questions having to do with the evening on Thanksgiving that he feels Woods still needs to address before offering, "There are more questions, of course, none of which have anything to do with Woods' relationship with his wife, alleged mistresses or a few prostitutes." Yet he doesn't pose any of those, instead running down a list of former professional athletes who have had to answer questions in the past. The list, best I can tell, is full of people who either cheated their sport or committed felonies, neither of which Woods has done in this situation.

And maybe the whole point of all this is that big national voices – more than just these few – are upset with Woods for coming back at the Masters because they feel the media deserves the truth. Smith demands that Woods talk with the media at Augusta – and, in doing so, talk to kids and parents (and guardians). Plaschke complains that Woods will be coming back to Augusta, and in doing so, make the tournament all about him and not about the green jacket.

If you look at how this has played out, the indignation is even more hilarious: Woods got in a car crash and had to go to the hospital. Amid speculation, a statement was put out on his personal website. Reports about a fight, reports about all these women, reports with quotes from these women, reports about a divorce and a mother-in-law in the hospital and sex rehab and reports and reports and reports that were followed up by angry demands for him to speak. This, of course, led up to a (boycotted) speech by Woods, apologizing and explaining as best he could – though terribly robotic – what has happened. Now he's announced he wants to play golf, at the most respected – and, yes, protected – course in the country.

Who created this circus again? The golfer with a personal situation that became immensely public and decided to try and regain control of his life, or the media who sent helicopters to his house and get paid hefty sums of money to come up with lines like, "meanwhile, the athletes will be empowered more and the public won't matter at all" for what could happen if Woods doesn't answer questions about his personal life.

I cannot wait until next week's South Park, in hopes they do an entire episode on the media's reaction to what they covered in this week's episode. Seeing a South Park drawn debate between Plaschke and Smith would be amazing.

This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.