So at today's Portland Trail Blazers practice, Marcus Camby reportedly rolled his ankle, and was seen walking around with his leg "heavily taped" afterwards. Camby said he expects to play Sunday, so it's no crisis, but still. Another Blazer injury? And to Camby, the guy who emerged as the team's great savior when Brandon Roy went down? Until you realize Camby's mostly okay, it reads like a bad April's Fools joke...â†µ
...Or something far more grave. Like, say, a biblical plague from the Basketball Gods. If that's what we're dealing with here, then let's break it down, side-by-side with the acutal biblical plague.
- The death of the first-born in all Egyptian families ... This is clearly the Greg Oden injury. â†µ
- All of Egypt's livestock becomes diseased ... Rudy Fernandez and Nicholas Batum injuries.
- Hail mixed with fire rains down from the skies ... Brandon Roy's injury on the eve of the playoffs. â†µ
- All bodies of water turn to blood ... Joel Pryzbilla slips in his bathtub, ending his season.
This leaves a few more potential outcomes for the Blazers—things could get much worse.â†µ
- The land of Egypt is overrun by frogs. ... Kevin Pritchard starts drafting and trading for exclusively French players. â†µ
- Every Egyptian is beset by incurable boils ... Donald Sterling buys the team. â†µ
- Swarms of flies overtake the land ... Rasheed Wallace and Zach Randolph return to Portland. â†µ
- Every citizen is infected with incurable lice ... Bob Whitsitt comes back, too. â†µ
- Darkness overtakes the land of Egypt ... The Trail Blazers trade Greg Oden for Kevin Durant. And relocate to Oklahoma City a year later. â†µ
And really, it's good reminder to Blazers fans to keep this in perspective. Things could get far more dire.