Wisconsin Burglars Lack Badger Patriotism

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↵It turns out there is at least one person in Wisconsin who likes money more than Ron Dayne, the quintessential Wisconsin Godzillaback who won a Heisman trophy that's aging more poorly than any in recent vintage. The guy in question stole almost $150,000 in jewelry from two different homes of Dayne's. Here is an accounting of the world's worst open house: ↵

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↵⇥My (Rose Bowl) rings, and my Heisman ring, a couple watches, some bracelets, just things that were a lot of custom stuff," said Dayne, of the stolen items. ↵⇥

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↵⇥Police said more than $100,000 in jewelry was stolen from his Waunakee home in early April, shortly after the home went up for sale. ↵⇥

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↵That's a crappy thing to have happen. This is crappier: ↵

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↵⇥Last weekend, a home on Madison's East Side that Dayne shares with a roommate was burglarized. A bracelet was among the $40,000 in items stolen in the second burglary in two months. ↵⇥

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↵Two robberies, two months, and now Dayne has already burned through his NFL money so extensively that he has a roommate. If the laws of sitcoms hold here, the roommate is no doubt an effete foreigner who eats only vegetables and has never heard of football.  Unfortunately, they do not: the man in question has the last name "Slaughter" and owns a motorsports company. ↵

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↵If and when Dayne declares bankruptcyas 78% of former NFL players do at least he'll be able to say it wasn't his fault. Sort of. If I had $100,000 dollars in easily-removable stuff laying around a house I was trying to sell I would remove the stuff myselfas mentioned, this would not be difficultand put in a safe place, like maybe a safe. ↵

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↵But really, let's focus on the Wisconsin natives who don't remember the 1999 and 2000 Rose Bowls. Back to back Rose Bowl MVPs! Leave the man alone! ↵

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↵*(While Dayne did plow over the meek and timid in 1999, Michigan and 3-8 Cincinnati shut him down. Meanwhile, Michael Vick existed.) ↵ ↵

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This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.

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