It would be reasonable to think, after an athletics director of a prominent university has been arrested for allegedly driving drunk and having a woman other than his wife in the car, "How could it possibly get worse?"
The answer: The Atlanta Journal-Constitution gets a copy of the police report.
For those of you who need the background: University of Georgia Athletics Director Damon Evans was arrested late Wednesday for DUI. Riding along in the car was Courtney Fuhrmann, whose presence in the car is notable because she is not Evans' wife.
But just before he was booked into Atlanta City Jail on a DUI charge, Evans was "crying uncontrollably," said Trooper M. Cabe, who pulled over Evans' 2009 BMW after he meandered across the center line of Roswell Road near Chastain Drive at 11:55 p.m. Wednesday.
Evans, who admitted to drinking three Vodka cocktails, began bargaining with the trooper as soon as he realized he might be placed under arrest. "I am not trying to bribe you but I'm the athletic director of the University of Georgia," Evans said. ...
The trooper, who noted that Evans had a pair of red panties between his legs, asked the athletic director "what her panties were doing in his side of the seat. He stated, ‘She took them off and I held them because I was just trying to get her home.' "
And it goes on. Really, if you're into schadenfreude, it's literally Christmas in July.
This most assuredly will not make it easier for Evans to hold onto his job, something that already seemed dicey after the arrest itself became public knowledge on Thursday. Vacationing University President Michael Adams' statement about Evans was decidedly noncommittal, and one would assume his phone call with Evans didn't include the pair of red panties.