Alert! Brett Favre Headed North! Stop The Presses!

Are you holding a baby? Performing open-heart surgery? Currently dangling with both hands from a wire suspended between two eighty-story skyscrapers? STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND TURN ON ESPN BECAUSE BRETT FAVRE IS HEADED NORTH. You cannot miss this national news of immense importance, and those petty things will wait. 

Ignore any other news you may hear. We at SB Nation are into facts, not supposition, so here's what we can say safely: Brett Favre is on a plane, and that plane is headed north. Therefore, we feel confident in publishing the following map illustrating the possible destinations for Favre this afternoon. 

This leaves open the following possibilities: 

--Favre is going to return to the Vikings. 

--Favre is flying to Bass Pro Shops. (What, you don't take your private plane to Bass Pro Shops? Peasant.) 

--Favre is headed to Branson to see Ray Stevens live In Branson as part of his Bucket List.

--Favre has signed a contract with the Montreal Alouettes.

--Favre will fly to Minnesota, circle the Vikings facility, drop leaflets that read "LOL sry" and turn and fly to Aruba in elaborate taunting of Brad Childress. 

More to come, but another rock solid prediction: you will be tired of whatever it is before you even read it.