A Preview Of Tony La Russa's Retirement

ST. LOUIS, MO - Manager Tony La Russa of the St. Louis Cardinals rides with the Budweiser Clydesdales during a parade celebrating the team's 11th World Series championship October 30, 2011. (Photo by Whitney Curtis/Getty Images)

Tony La Russa's transition to civilian life might not be as seamless as you think.


Elaine La Russa
: Honey, we have to go to the post office, get some milk at the store, and pick up my prescription at the pharmacy.

Tony La Russa: Okay. I'd love some company.

Elaine: Sure, sweetie.

later, at the post office

Tony: Checked the P.O. box, got some stamps ... okay, sweetie, thanks. You can go.

Elaine: Wait, what about the pharmacy and store?

Tony: Marcie from across the street is coming by to help me. She's better at clipping coupons and saving money.

Elaine: You're not ... she's not ... you're not having a thing with her, are you?

Tony: No, no. She looks like Don Zimmer, sweetie. She's just better at what we need to do.

later, at the store

Tony: Okay, Marcie. Thanks. Saved $19 with our coupons and club card.

Marcie: I feel so used.

Tony: Hit the showers, Marcie.

pats Marcie on the butt

Tony: Waiting for that kid I met on the train who had a year of pharmacy school.

Dave Duncan: He seemed sharp.

La Russa squeezes out a response in Morse code, which is legitimately the only reason they've been holding hands this whole time.

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