15. Mat Latos' injury-conscious temper tantrum
FECKLESS PITCHER TEMPER TANTRUM POWER RANKINGS
5. Mule-kicking wall so as to avoid injury
4. Taking the end of a bat and slamming it into the bat rack and then just kind of doing that a few more times
3. Sitting on the bench and uttering noises such as "fffff" and "ghhhh" to let your teammates know that you're super mad for real
2. Saying "crap" to reporter
1. Taking the f*** out of a shower
14. Jon Lester survives splintered bat
TERRIFYING THINGS THAT JON LESTER HAS SURVIVED POWER RANKINGS
5. The realization that he was driving in the wrong direction in a Wal-Mart parking lot
4. Wasp in living room
3. Reading the Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark story in which the girl's ribbon is removed from her neck and then her head falls off
2. Bat that splinters into pieces and comes right at you and follows you even if you get out of the way
13. Minnesota Wild help keep Dallas Stars out of playoffs
(Suggested by our own Travis Hughes)
PEOPLE WHO GO TO MINNESOTA WILD GAMES POWER RANKINGS
5. Minnesota Twins fans
4. Minnesota Wild fans
3. Minnesota Golden Gophers fans
2. Mimes who love golf
1. A forlorn man with a crooked tie who dreams it all into bittersweet existence
12. Starlin Castro takes a throw to the face
IMAGES SEEN BY STARLIN CASTRO RIGHT AFTER THIS BALL HIT HIM IN THE JAW POWER RANKINGS
5. Shawon Dunston in a high chair, being served a slice of birthday cake by Bud Selig in a wig and apron
4. A repairman disassembling a television set and finding a grinning Harry Caray and Steve Stone squatting inside of it
3. Castro sitting at a desk and reviewing the Brewers' Carlos Gomez's "Application to Steal Second Base" while Gomez sits opposite him and tries not to look nervous
2. Homer Simpson on the television, cupping his hands and yelling, "Illinois! That's where we live! Illinois!" before the electricity shuts off and the tornado sirens begin to wail
1. A winged, luminescent Steve Bartman walking up to him, apologizing for not being able to step in and catch the ball for him, picking him up, and carrying him to bed
11. This is the guy who found out about bin Laden before we did
SENTIMENTS ABOUT WRESTLING THAT BRIEFLY INHABIT YOU WHILE WATCHING WRESTLEMANIA POWER RANKINGS
5. This is so stupid.
4. God, this is SO, SO STUPID.
3. Wait, the problem doesn't lie with wrestling, it lies in my preconceptions and steadfast refusal to enjoy it. This is great.
2. I am having the time of my life watching this unbelievably stupid s***.
1. SB Nation should have a pro wrestling hub.