10. Texas coach Rick Barnes is excited about something
THINGS RICK BARNES COULD POSSIBLY BE STARING AT POWER RANKINGS
5. A basketball game
4. A basketball game played by gingerbread men
3. A basketball game played by gingerbread men on a trampoline
2. A basketball game played by gingerbread men on a trampoline who have managed to convince him that he is a lizard person
1. The gates of Heaven, where it is revealed that God is an enormous BLT
9. The irrepressible Shaka Smart
(Click image to view. Via @jose3030)
THINGS THE THOROUGHLY UNIMPRESSED MAN IN UPPER LEFT IS THINKING POWER RANKINGS
5. He has fallen. Someone should call the police. Not it.
4. I can't see the whiteboard from this angle, but I'm almost certain he just drew a bunch of numbers and then started scribbling.
3. Osama bin Laden is hanging out in a nicer place than I am right now. That is so weird.
2. Is he trying to tackle the invisible robber who stole his hair?
1. More like Shaka Stupid, is what he's more like. I should write that down. I wish I had thought to bring my PalmPilot.
8. Jack Wilson's double play
(Suggested by our own Jeff Sullivan)
SUGGESTIONS THAT MAKE YOU KIND OF A TOOL IF YOU ACTUALLY FOLLOW THEM POWER RANKINGS
5. Wait 30 seconds before plugging your modem back in
4. Visit Tide.com at TV commercial's behest
3. Wear reflective clothing while trick-or-treating
2. Make sure to use Best Choice-brand mayonnaise for this recipe
1. Touch second base while turning a double play
7. Steve Blake, NBA superfan
PUNISHMENTS STEVE BLAKE COULD FACE FOR RUNNING ON THE COURT AND GRABBING THE BALL POWER RANKINGS
4. Jail time
3. Community service work
2. Forcible removal and permanent banishment from premises by arena security
1. The realization that as a fan, he did NOT reflect the spirit of Laker Nation
6. Chris Bosh is gross
POSSIBLE EVOLUTIONARY PURPOSES FOR THE VOLUME OF SPIT THAT IS COMING OUT OF CHRIS BOSH'S FACE RIGHT NOW POWER RANKINGS
5. Natural selection favors those who are able to effectively communicate how loud they are yelling in animated GIFs
4. Blinds prey, is velociraptor spit
3. Repels predators on account of how super gross it is
2. Means "basketball!" in the wordless spit-language spoken by the alien society that shoved him into a space capsule and shot him to Earth because he betrayed the wishes of Lord Xnath by entering the forbidden wilderness despite... whatever, long story
1. Is means of demonstrating third-best-manship in one's peer group