1. I liked the glowing puck.
2. I thought Sabermetrics was like P90x.
3. I am Matt Cassel.
4. When I was eight years old, there was a 10-second window in which it would have been socially acceptable to ask what offensive holding is. I didn't, the window closed forever, and to this day I think it's just when you grab somebody's shirt.
5. I told you all I had ACL surgery because of a high school football injury. It was actually because I tried to stand on a chair.
6. I follow the Fox Sports robot on Twitter.
7. I watch golf in the nude. It is the only thing I have ever loved.
8. I don't actually know what doping is. Frankly, I hear the word and picture Lance Armstrong wearing a kangol and tracksuit and just sitting on a bench by himself and feeding birds.
9. I just had the image of Gary Bettman's face, in the exact size of his face, tattooed directly onto my face.
10. I am the one who has been parking a van in the Talladega parking lot, flipping on a high-intensity shortwave transmitter, holding the mic too close to my mouth, and impersonating Fat Bastard in the form of short, halted shrieks for five hours.
11. When Matchbox 20 played in St. Louis, Rob Thomas said, "go Cardinals." It was the most important moment of my entire life.
12. I choose Cover 6 every time in Madden because the picture shows the circles covering the largest area.
(With an assist from Spencer Hall)