Jeb Corliss Was Just Trying To Kick A Balloon

Tomorrow night Real Sports on HBO will air an important story about BASE jumper Jeb Corliss. It is not important for so many of the reasons past Real Sports segments have been.

They will not break up a child trafficking ring or tell the story of a down-on-his-luck boxer devastated by the sport. They will not expose the NFL's terrible concussion policy or improve the world in any way.

That's good, because you probably didn't watch any of those anyway since reality like this is very boring and sad. Now, a guy slamming into a mountain at terminal velocity while wearing a wingsuit? Now, THAT'S Home Box Office entertainment you will show up for begging like a hungry Corgi.

See, it's okay because he lived, and that means you can say things like, "OH DUUUUUUDE WHAAAAT," without feeling too bad about yourself. Corliss did suffer two broken legs (including one with a nasty compound fracture), but what could have been much worse was prevented by Corliss opening his chute after coming into contact with a ridge of Table Mountain during a wingsuit flight.

Corliss explains how this happened in the first place. Okay, maybe "explains" is a strong word. He describes what happens, and your normal brain will attempt to process this.

Well the answer is very simple. I was flying too close and messed up :) I was going for a black balloon that was basically laying on the rocks and was going to try and kick it with my foot. In order to do this I had to fly low and flat between boulders. My left foot clipped a boulder that dragged me into a flat ledge that I took at the waist at full speed. If I had not clipped that boulder I might have made it, I might have still impacted. It's very hard to tell from the footage. Everything happens very fast. But when you go for a flight where inches are the difference between making it and not making it well impact is very possible. I knew this and took the risk and paid the price for pushing way to hard. I take full responsibility for my actions and am just happy I still have legs to do rehab on.

Just trying to kick a balloon sitting on rocks while you're flying by? Well, sure. that makes total sense, Jeb.

Explanation accepted, and you've obviously learned your lesson not to call a mountain "your playground" ever, ever again.

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