GIF Tournament II: 'CC Sabathia/Spider-Man' Vs. 'Flyin' Chris Capuano'

GIF TOURNAMENT II -- FIRST ROUND
MORTIFIED MICHIGAN PUNTER REGION

(5) CC SABATHIA/SPIDER-MAN vs.
(12) FLYIN' CHRIS CAPUANO

(5) Good to see you again. I am CC SABATHIA/SPIDER-MAN.

Special nomination. Finished second in Week 8 of THIS WEEK IN GIFs with 277 votes.

You know what I'm really getting tired of? Origin stories. All these superhero movie franchises spend an entire film explaining to us why this man in the silly suit fights crime. My purchase of the movie ticket is my signal to you that I already accept this ridiculous premise, so there's no need to spend two thirds of the first movie trying to sell me on his motivations or the feasibility of this whole deal.

This gets it right. This is how you should have introduced the new Spider-Man series: he flew out of some guy's butt and now he's here. Bang. We've accomplished what took you 70 minutes in about five seconds, and now we can get to the part where he either overestimates or underestimates his powers and learns a valuable lesson. Actually that part sucks too. Just make him fight people.

(12). Hi there. I am FLYIN' CHRIS CAPUANO.

Automatic bid. Won Week 12 of THIS WEEK IN GIFs with 181 votes.

The baseball itself is the only thing that keeps the act of baseball within the realm of sanity. The second the ball leaves the picture, you're suddenly left with a dozen or so guys dorking around in the middle of a field in ludicrously tall socks.

All the baseball has to do is step away for a fraction of a second. It all goes to Hell. This play is a hairsbreadth away from being a really cool highlight. But the ball won't participate, so it's just "dude doin' the Superman."

VOTE!