The Week in Worst: Sometimes you just shouldn't try to slam that dunk

Stephen Dunn

Another week, another round of bad NBA plays. We've collected the worst of the worst for you, in GIF form.

Now that both the All-Star break and the NBA trade deadline are behind us, we can get back to what's really important: mocking professional athletes for isolated moments in time when they looked incompetent. We've assembled some GIFs of these moments so that we can all feel better about ourselves. Those pro athletes sure are a bunch of overpaid fraudlosers, aren't they? Heh.

The recurring theme for this week is "missed dunks." You'll see a few of them here. Quite a few. The moral of the story (just as Aesop wrote in his timeless fable "The Birdman and the Slamma-Jamma") is that sometimes you just need to let those seemingly-easy dunks go. You can't slam a dunk all of the time, nor can you dunk a slam. Sometimes you just look like a buffoon. Especially me, as my attempts at slams dunk generally can't even reach the bottom of the net. Let us enjoy the hubris of these superstars who cannot pass up any opportunity to try for a dunk, even when (especially when) it ends in wailing and the gnashing of teeth.

Here are the very worst NBA plays from the week of Feb. 18-24.

Worst Fancy Pass

Player: Ray Allen

Date: Feb. 21

Raylol_medium

(click to animate)

Awwww yeh, gonna just bust a sweet/sick behind-the-back (heh I calls it the "BTB" for short; m'boys know about the abbreev) to m'fellow black-jerseyed Heat brethren and then we'll put the finishing touch on this fast-break bad-boy.

HUP.

WAIT OH NO I HAVE FORGOTTEN THAT WE'RE IN THE RED JERSEYS TODAY AND OUR FOES ARE SWADDLED IN BLACK. WHAT HAVE I DONE

oh wait perhaps there is a foul here? referee, may I perchance get a foul for these gentlemen tricking me? no?

WELL THE HELL WITH Y'ALL THEN

Worst Alley-Oop

Player: Chris Bosh

Date: Feb. 20

Lolboshnope_medium

Chris Bosh update: still Chris Bosh. Pretty much the maximum Chris Bosh you can get. 100% Bosh (per volume.)

Worst Wide-Open Dunk

Player: Russell Westbrook

Date: Feb. 20

Lolruss_medium

The reason this isn't just the worst slam dunk of the week is that it still resulted in a Thunder score. Yes, very embarrassing for the amazing Russell Westbrook, but not the worst of all attempted slam dunks of the week (we'll get to that in a bit). One is reminded of when you go for the dunk in Double Dribble and expect to get that stone-age B&W "portrait" basketball GIF, but instead your featureless white guy's shot bounces off the back of the rim and the backboard before being picked up by one of the other nine vaguely-flickering guys.

I'm totally convinced that analogy plays.

Worst Butterfingers

Player: LeBron James

Date: Feb. 21

Lebronfraud_medium

(click to animate)

Geez, LeBron. Maybe you should actually use some of that talcum powder instead of just throwing it everywhere all willy-nilly and playing hell with everyone's allergies. You ever think of THAT, you jerk? Ugh, what a butterfraud.

Worst Turnover

Player: Manu Ginobili

Date: Feb. 21

Ginoooo_medium

(click to animate)

My personal favorite part of this GIF is not that the ball goes ZOOOOP straight to the Clippers. My favorite part -- other than this happening to the Spurs -- is that it appears Blake Griffin takes a full-arm swipe at the back of his head like Manu is his nerdy cousin he's trying to make look dumb in front of his friends.

Actually, that's a pretty good comparison for how Blake Griffin acts a lot of the time. Like a 12-year-old who is trying to impress his friends. Think about it: imagine his many flops, but with a soundtrack of him whining "GEEEEEZ MAWM, I'LL DO IT LATERRRRRR. GEEEEEEEEEEEZ."

Perfect.

Worst Dawning Realization That Something Good Might Be Happening

Player: Jack Nicholson

Date: Feb. 20

Jack_medium

Jack Nicholson: craggy; slightly sweaty; befuddled; addled; ambivalent.

Take a long, hard look. This is where we're all headed, sports fans. It's coming to all of us eventually. Well, maybe not the millions of dollars and worldwide acclaim. Or the quarter-zip pullover fleece. But the rest of it, certainly.

Worst At Not Giving You Night Terrors

Player: This gymnast

Date: Feb. 22

Teethspin_medium

(click to animate)

No word on which game this was from. I think it was from Event Horizon vs. Beyond the Black Rainbow. This is a contortionist with her body bent backwards over her head, and her entire body weight supported by her teeth, while she slowly rotates. What really sells it are the slightly convulsing hands. This looks like something that attacks you from out of the dark in Doom III. This is horrifying. You're welcome.

Worst Dunk Attempt

Player: Dwyane Wade

Date: Feb. 21

Wadederpdunk_medium

And finally, we get to the true worst dunk of the week. Wade doesn't just miss the dunk as the defender whiffs. He misses so badly that the ball flies higgledy-piggledy up into the air and Chris Bosh has to scramble like he's Shaggy running away from a g-g-g-ghost in a Scooby-Doo cartoon in order to track it down before it goes past half-court. That's a bad dunk attempt. I keep half-expecting Bosh to slip on a banana peel before he gets to the ball and end up with a garbage can on his head.

Just Overall Worst

Player: Derrick Favors

Date: Feb. 23

Favors_medium

Sometimes a play is so bad that it's like a magic trick. And sometimes a play is so bad that nothing more be said than "LOL Derrick Favors."

More in the NBA:

Dwyane Wade's nickname is awful, but our suggestions are worse

Video: LeBron's incredible pregame dunk

Who doesn't like In-and-Out burgers? The Spurs, apparently

New grades for old trades: The NBA's pre-deadline deals

Mike Woodson calls out Carmelo Anthony

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