It is common practice for zoos to get in the spirit of their local teams' playoff efforts. Sometimes, though, it kinda feels like the animals aren't real fans -- like the zoos are merely projecting their fanaticism onto disinterested beasts. With that in mind, let us take a look at the fan residents of the San Antonio Zoo and Miami Jungle Island.
On Sunday, the San Antonio Zoo held a pre-Game 2 pep rally of sorts headlined by their sun bear, Baubles. Baubles showed his support for the Spurs by wantonly shredding a box decorated with the Miami logo and the message "Beat the Heat" whilst bloodthirsty children chanted:
On its face, that's quite a statement. Baubles is shredding apart Miami's championship aspirations much as he would a honeycomb. I sense something fishy, though. Take a look at this bit from the Fox San Antonio investigative report on the subject:
He ripped it to shreds as a way of showing what the Spurs plan to do to Miami on the court.
Inside the box, he enjoyed a nice treat.
Play back the video a few times and you can clearly see that Baubles finishes his display of fanatical defiance with a few licks of that unseen "treat". Methinks this bear is a lousy bandwagon jumper. Much like the human fan who only shows up for the free t-shirt or bobblehead, Baubles got coerced into his fandom. I'm not even sure he's a Spurs supporter, honestly. As a bear, he may well have been rooting against San Antonio in their Western Conference Final series against the Grizzlies. I know a fake fan when I see one. Do you even know who Mike Budenholzer is, bear?
What about the creatures of Miami? Residents of Jungle Island got a visit from the Larry O'Brien Trophy last week. It hung out with a white tiger cub:
The trophy had an audience with a black-and-white ruffed lemur, too:
Why'd the trophy visit Miami and not San Antonio? Because these folks are REAL FANIMALS. That's why. Like, this baby capuchin monkey owns a customized Heat cap:
Sure, he's not old enough to remember Rony Seikaly, but he's the real deal. So is this red ruffed lemur who owns a...hmm...remarkably similar hat:
I guess hat options are limited when you have a tiny head.
Whatever. What I'm saying is the Miami zoo denizens are REAL FANIMALS, not front-running fakers like that San Antonio bear. FAN UP, BAUBLES.