Football Guys

Football Guys: Mark Sanchez Comes Of Age

In today's Football Guys chat room, the obvious parallels between the Jets' Mark Sanchez and The Wonder Years' Kevin Arnold were finally acknowledged. And he knew what he had to do.

Football Guys: The Raiders Acquire Carson Palmer For Every Draft Pick Ever And A Million Billion Dollars

On Tuesday, the Oakland Raiders traded away a first-round pick for Carson Palmer, who is maybe like the 14th-best quarterback in the league. In today's Football Guys, the franchise turns to a new, already-scribbled-on page.

Football Guys: If Internet Commenters Ran The NFL

Today in the official unofficial chat room of the NFL, an Internet commenter is allowed to be commissioner for a day. This will end well.

Football Guys: Arian Foster Analyzes Modern Traffic Infrastructure

This week, the Texans' Arian Foster tweeted that he didn't understand traffic: 'Barring an accident, if everyone just goes, there shouldn't be a problem.' We attempt to get to the bottom of this in the newest installment of Football Guys.

Football Guys: Tony Romo Suffers From Flagging Restaurant Sales

On Monday night, 32-year-old rookie kicker Dan Bailey scored 18 points. What were the rest of the Cowboys doing, then? The answer is found in today's Football Guys chat room.

Football Guys: The Dolphins Are Gonna Go Out There And Show Us A Thing Or Two

Dolphins coach Tony Sparano may be in danger of losing his job if he can't start winning. In today's installment of Football Guys, he and the Dolphins draw up a last-minute overhaul of their playbook. It's a really bad playbook!

Football Guys: The Chiefs Are Totally Screwed Forever

At the moment, the Kansas City Chiefs are perhaps the saddest team in the NFL. Forget having enough players on their depth chart. At this rate, they'll probably run out of nouns.

Football Guys: Just Like 10 Minutes Of Derrick Mason Making Bill Belichick Feel Bad

The NFL Network's documentary on Bill Belichick showed the head coach trading insults with Ravens receiver Derrick Mason. They showed the first five seconds or so. Here is the rest of it.

Football Guys: Welcome To The 'Losing Week 1 Quarterbacks' Chat Room!

Some of Week 1's losing quarterbacks played well. Others were so bad that someone probably should have called the police. In today's installment of Football Guys, Chad Henne, Ben Roethlisberger, and others try to make sense of it all.

Football Guys: David Garrard And The Chatroom of Misfit Free Agent Quarterbacks

Today in the official unofficial Internet chat room of the NFL, recently-released quarterback David Garrard finds himself in the most terrifying of worlds.


Football Guys: Terrelle Pryor Scores A Negative Four Million On The Wonderlic

Once again, a young black quarterback has been the subject of hand-wringing over an incorrect report of a bad score on largely ridiculous and largely irrelevant intelligence test. 21st-century racism is so complicated!

Football Guys: A Peek Into The Online Chat Room Of The NFL

"The Dugout" is a long-running series of mock chat rooms in which baseball players say mean things to each other. Today, we present the birth of an NFL-themed spinoff, the appropriately-named "Football Guys."

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