Like A Lion Being Ridden By A Million Little Faires

Regardless of how you feel about the celebrities here or what they're saying, Gawker's turned celebrity descriptions into a sport of its own. For instance: I have no idea who they're even talking about here, but the paragraph's fantastic regardless.

↵
↵
  • Kelly Killoren-Bensimon: “She’s like the cowardly lion with her big mane and various trepidations and confusions. Actually she’s more like a lion that is being ridden by a million fairies, all pulling at her hair and sprinkling their dust while she cowers under a tree and eats Starburst, but not the yellow ones cause they are gross. She feeds those to the fairies.”
  • ↵
    ↵

    ...And so is this collection of some of Gawker's greatest hits. Come for the Gwyneth-bashing, but definitely stay for Zooey Deschanel.

    ↵

    (HT @erikmal)

    ↵
    X
    Log In Sign Up

    forgot?
    Log In Sign Up

    Forgot password?

    We'll email you a reset link.

    If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

    Forgot password?

    Try another email?

    Almost done,

    By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

    Join SBNation.com

    You must be a member of SBNation.com to participate.

    We have our own Community Guidelines at SBNation.com. You should read them.

    Join SBNation.com

    You must be a member of SBNation.com to participate.

    We have our own Community Guidelines at SBNation.com. You should read them.

    Spinner.vc97ec6e

    Authenticating

    Great!

    Choose an available username to complete sign up.

    In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.