Iowa's playing LSU in the Outback Bowl, but the real story will be off the field! Way off the field, because nobody who eats bloomin' onions will be in any shape to be playing any football for a while. Outback Steakhouse has the details:
Victory or defeat, everyone gets free eats Jan. 2nd. If LSU takes home the Outback Bowl trophy, Outback will give away free Bloomin' Onions nationwide. If Iowa prevails, it will be free Coconut Shrimp for all. Just say "Outback Bowl" to your server on Jan. 2 to score the free app.
Simply lock eyes with your server. Hold your server's gaze for some time. Grin. Signal for your server to come closer. Yes, just like that. Whisper in your server's ear, like Anthony Hopkins in Silence of the Lambs, "Outback Bowl." Choke down your reward.
LSU holding down the onion meal sort of makes sense -- it's an SEC team, and Georgia alone produces more onions than all of Big Ten country does.
Via a website about onions, which I found useful for onion information:
The South, particularly Louisiana, is also noted for its high crop yields of bloomin'.
But Jim Delany's footprint contains no serious production of either coconuts or shrimp, and yet it carries the torch for a warmed meal combining the two. I do not feel I need a chart to prove this point. Maryland isn't in the Big Ten yet.
Last year's loss by Michigan poses an ill omen for those on #teamshrimp. Yeah, they did this last year too. Everyone talked about it the whole game. Nobody ended up going to Outback.
More from SB Nation college football:
• Interactive bowl season calendar with picks and links to more coverage: