It's 2013, and the three most American things are apple pie, beer and beating Mexico 2-0 in soccer.
Two of those three things happened Tuesday night in Columbus.
After the United States' dos a cero win, the team had a brief moment to parade flags around the stadium, but the party couldn't begin in earnest yet. Although they were aaaaaalmost guaranteed a spot in the World Cup, the Americans' spot in Brazil wouldn't become official until the result of a match between Honduras and Panama. The US needed a Honduran win or a draw, but that match hadn't started until an hour after the opening kick in Columbus.
So the team retreated into the locker room to watch together as the Hondurans and Panamanians battled and the raucous crowd dwindled to a few hundred faithful determined to celebrate with the team.
And when the final whistle blew in Tegucigalpa, the team sprinted out of the tunnel to join their faithful.
With booze, of course.
Some had Champagne. Others, like Landon Donovan here, just had Bud Light:
WE ARE GOING TO BRAZIIIIIL
WE ARE GOING TO BRAZIIIIIIIIIIL
WE ARE GOING TO WE ARE GOING TO WE ARE GOING TO BRAZIIIIIIIIIIIIIL
And when you start drinking, you start doing dumb things, like tossing a professional athlete in the air.
Never doubt these soccer players' arm strength. Actually, I am kinda worried about the arm strength of whoever that is getting tossed, as they may or may not be a CPR mannequin.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, the United States won a soccer game last night and the United States going to the World Cup and I watched TV for an hour after that soccer game while giddily smiling and watching the players who won the game be super excited about everything, and I'd do it again.
To quote Ian Darke, Go Go USA, and I'll see you in Brazil.