#Lookit

Ron Harper wants you to know that The Onion has the story wrong

Jonathan Daniel

Ron Harper might be one of the people who comments on Dan on Fire videos.

Surely you have heard of The Onion, the most wonderful satirical newspaper in the history of satirical newspapers. They also have a wonderful sports section.

Recently, they picked on five-time NBA champion Ron Harper, joking that the guy who won titles with Michael Jordan and Shaq was telling everybody that he had been on the Dream Team.

"Man, we'll never again have a group of superstars like we did in '92; I'm just proud to have been a part of it," the journeyman shooting guard reportedly told his checkout clerk at a local Stop & Shop earlier this week, adding his oft-repeated claim that "being selected as a starter for that squad was the biggest honor of [his] life." "That team was something else: Magic, Jordan, Bird, Barkley, and me, manning the perimeter. We were unstoppable. Granted, what we accomplished in '96 was pretty great too, but nothing can ever come close to that summer in Barcelona."

Ron Harper saw this, and wants you to know that the sources quoted in the article were lying:

Of course, there's the possibility Harper is having a go with us -- he gets that it's satire and he's pretending to not understand it for laughs and WE'RE the ones who have been fooled -- but, well, it doesn't seem that way:

No word on whether or not Harper is suing for libel.

For more people who think The Onion is real news, check out Literally Unbelievable.

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