People are watching the United States in the World Cup in record numbers! Woo! Patriotism! America! Sports! That's a good thing, right?
No, according to Keith Ablow of Fox News, it is not. We are watching the World Cup because the World Cup -- along with marijuana -- is a way to distract us from Barack Obama destroying America (via the Washington Post).
Everybody else on set immediately goes LA LA LA SHUT UP YOU'RE MAKING THE REST OF US LOOK STUPID BY ASSOCIATION, which is probably a good call.
He's not directly blaming Barack Obama. He's not accusing Obama of organizing an international soccer tournament that has been held every four years to distract people. He just thinks the reason we're paying attention to the World Cup is to sedate ourselves from the horrors of our everyday lives, which were caused by Barack Obama.
I try to avoid politics on this sports website, because, well, sports. However, regardless of whether you are Democratic or Republican, I think it's safe to say the reason more people are watching soccer is not because of Barack Obama. I think it's because we're enjoying watching exciting soccer, which is fun. The Super Bowl also had a record number of viewers this year, too, but I don't remember that anybody saying that was due to Ameirca's sad political state of affairs.
Although, we learned earlier this month that Obama is responsible for that horse not winning the Triple Crown, so maybe the truth is deeper than we thought.
Ablow would say more, though, leading to a Stephen Colbert spot: