"Welp, it's about time to show off these here new decals. Y'all better get on down to the killing shed and set up the 150-watt halogen work light."
Seriously, what in the hell is going on with these macabre-ass pictures? Did the John Wayne lawsuit shut off Duke's electricity? They made this super-sad football player look like a create-a-wrestler. But one that's going to murder you.
Well done, Duke. Normally we have to wait until March to mock you. Get ahead of that curve now.