Hearing that Russia has lost contact with a spacecraft and its crew would be devastating news, but what if that spacecraft's crew was a bunch of geckos engaging in a zero gravity space orgy?
The Foton-M4 satellite was launched on July 19 with a simple mission: "What happens when lizards have weightless sex in space?" It was a simple, noble pursuit that may have been cut short thanks to a malfunction aboard the ship. To make matters worse the geckos weren't taught how to talk to ground control before being shot into space on a rocket.
"So, there is only one-way communication,"
YOU THINK?!
Tests are being conducted on the vessel to determine if life sustaining systems have also been lost, resulting in the death of the lizards. For now we're left to mourn and ponder if we'll ever find out how zero G effects gecko sex. Space is a cruel and lonely place.
h/t @Gaknar