The ballad of the fan who ran on the field at the All-Star Game for Twitter (and was violently tackled)

The Star-Ledger-USA TODAY Sports

The story of a recent high school grad who was willed on by social media to run across the field during the MLB All-Star Game, through the eyes of his Twitter, his girlfriend, and his very, very angry mom.

During the fifth inning of the 2013 MLB All-Star Game at Citi Field, a fan sprinted onto the field. Because it is 2013, and the person in question is a recent high school graduate, every instant of the decision-making process leading up to interrupting one of America's most beloved sporting events and getting viciously tackled by security can be found on Twitter.

The person in question is named Dylan Masone. His Twitter feed looks a lot like the reason you should be glad Twitter didn't exist when you were in high school, and may or may not include occasional droppings of the N-bomb. Tuesday, he started to make it clear he was going to the All-Star Game. He tweeted a picture of himself in his Robinson Cano jersey -- bad choice at Citi Field, bruh -- and then, made the fateful promise:

As you can see, he got more than the requisite 1,000 retweets. And unlike some people, who ask for 50,000 RTs and then DON'T go on a date with Kate Upton or whoever, Dylan was ready to pounce.

He saw the tweet numbers rising:

(Is there really any need to bring Justin Tuck into this?)

And rising:

And rising:

But before we get to his sprint, let us introduce two more characters to the dramatis personae:

Dylan's concerned mom

Apparently informed by somebody who saw one of the 1,000-plus RT's and did not want her boy to go to prison:

Dylan's girlfriend

Who is just as big a Twitterhound as her soon-to-be-tackled BF:

She remained confident that Dylan didn't have the guts:

But sweetened the pot:

And with an angry mom and a swooning girlfriend, our young protagonist got ready to take the stage:

HIS MOM WAS SERIOUSLY NOT ENTERTAINED:

"I got 1,000 RT's, ma" has never been successfully used as an excuse.

And that's where Masone's Twitter feed understandably leaves us for the evening, the ultimate cliffhanger.

But thanks to the thousands of photographers at the game, we can chronicle his journey, a tragedy in three parts:

Act 1: The Glory

20130716_jla_usa_246

Photo Credit: USA Today Sports

Act 2: The Fall

20130716_jla_so3_250

Photo credit: The Star-Ledger

Act 3: The End

20130716_jla_usa_247

Photo Credit: USA Today Sports

I think this is the ultimate sign NSA wiretapping does not go far enough. Dude literally said he was going to run onto the field, and it was retweeted over 1,000 times, yet no precog deep in the bowels of Citi Field alerted security to the fact that this was going to happen. Then again, I suppose if the Mets had precogs, Ike Davis would never have started a single game this year.

Although Masone was quickly disposed of and hauled off into Mets Prison, which is actually a fully functioning old-timey sheriff's office with big WANTED posters for Mo Vaughn and Bobby Bonilla's agent, that's not the end of his tale. While Masone won't be heard from until his captors release him, we can watch the blossoming pride of his better half unfolding on Twitter.

True romance, there.

Now we can watch the events unfold in her eyes:

DRAMA!!!!

oh lol it was just a jk we're cool lmao

But her pride quickly turns to panic:

But at the end of the day, she was swept off her feet by her boyfriend's valiant deeds:

And by the fact that he just wasted all his grad party money:

This is more than the story of an idiot who wanted to run onto a field on national television and get beaten up by strong men with the power and authority to arrest him. Yes, it's also the story of an idiot who wanted to run onto a field on national television and get beaten up by strong men with the power and authority to arrest him, but it's so much more. It's a story about young love, about passion and the will to succeed against all odds. About setting a goal and achieving it, the American dream.

And it's also the story of a kid who blew his grad party cash and who is TOTALLY grounded, because his mom is legitimately super-pissed.

More from SB Nation:

American League wins, 3-0 | Mo Rivera named MVP

Mariano Rivera bids farewell to the All-Star Game

The ballad of the kid who ran on the field at the All-Star Game

Yoenis Cespedes wins the 2013 Home Run Derby

Longread: Brooklyn’s field of broken dreams

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