Putting spring training perfection in context

What does a perfect spring training game mean? A look at some comparable scenarios

With Jarred Cosart's recent performance fresh in our collective memory, we thought it would be useful to put spring training perfection into context. Cosart is just to latest pitcher who has managed to go five perfect innings this spring, joining CC Sabathia and Matt Cain in perfection, not to mention the four Marlins pitchers who combined for a no-hitter. To wit, the list:

Things that carry as much meaning as a perfect game in spring

  1. A bachelors degree in English
  2. Malaysian flight theories
  3. Borders to Russia
  4. High school relationships
  5. The phrase "premium" at McDonald's
  6. IPOs
  7. Being followed by Jose Bautista
  8. That mixtape your ex-girlfriend gave you
  9. Pitcher wins
  10. Michael Bay's artistic vision

It's not these things don't exist or that something can't come of it (Bautista will definitely be your best friend, bro) but it's nothing more than window dressing in the end. The shortened outings, as well as the weaker lineups and general practice atmosphere all combine to enhance the fact that perfect games in general don't mean anything, much less in spring training.

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