You were stuck at work and weren't able to watch Thursday's NASCAR Championship Contenders press conference in South Beach.
That's cool. We get it.
Never fear, though: We've broken down an hour's worth of Tony Stewart vs. Carl Edwards interviews into a few tasty nuggets for you to digest.
Here's the trash talk scorecard. Read the comments below and see if you agree with our score:
The trash talk begins...
Stewart: I'd wreck my mom to win a championship. ... I respect him as a driver, but this isn't about friendships this weekend. This is a war. This is a battle. This is for a national championship. It's no holds barred this weekend. I didn't come this far to be one step away from it and let it slip away, so we're going to go for it.
Edwards (pretends he didn't listen): Did you say something?
Stewart: Yeah – you can come visit my trophy in the room at Vegas when you come out there.
Edwards: He's got the talking part figured out. Problem is, you haven't led the points yet this year, have you?
Stewart: They say there's talkers and doers. I've done this (won a championship) twice.
Edwards: That's the funny thing. I've listened to you talk a lot today. You've talked a lot about your past successes. That is very respectable. And truly, all joking aside, that will make it more fun if we're able to beat you. It will make me more proud.
POINT: Stewart. SCORE: Stewart 1, Edwards 0.
Tony says he has no pressure on him. Hey Carl, you believe that?
Edwards: I'm not really buying it. ... I mean, if you're asking me to believe that he doesn't go to bed thinking, 'Man, I want to win this thing as bad as anyone,' I don't believe that.
Stewart: We don't have anything to lose. I mean, we literally don't. There's nothing that we can lose this weekend no matter what happens on the racetrack. We just don't have anything to lose. So I think when you got a guy that has something to lose, has a little to lose, then you got to worry about that a little bit.
POINT: Edwards. SCORE: Stewart 1, Edwards 1.
A foregone conclusion?
Stewart: I've not talked to (his racing hero and friend A.J.) Foyt. He'll call me after we win on Sunday. ... It's like Kid Rock said: 'It's not cocky if you back it up.' I think we've been backing it up the last three weeks. It's what our intention is.
POINT: Stewart. SCORE: Stewart 2, Edwards 1.
No 'dead weight' here...
Edwards: When I go to bed at night, I don't worry about sponsors, I don't worry about women, I don't worry about money, I don't worry about anything but going as fast as I can go. I just go out there and race.
Stewart: (Shakes head, laughs)
POINT: Edwards. SCORE: Stewart 2, Edwards 2.
On the other hand...
Stewart: I'm alright being a single guy without a wife and a family right now. (Carl) gets to think about one of them, I get to think about all of them. It makes it a lot more fun.
I don't have to worry about (women). If I don't want to be around one, I can go home. He has to be with (wife Kate) whether he wants to be around her or not.
POINT: Stewart. SCORE: Stewart 3, Edwards 2.
What's on the menu?
Stewart: I had an Office Depot appearance on Tuesday, and they served roast duck in honor of us beating Carl this weekend.
POINT: Stewart. SCORE: Stewart 4, Edwards 2.
How calm is Carl, really?
Stewart: I think he's doing a pretty good acting job up there today. I think he's a lot more nervous than he lets on. He's got a lot of class and a lot of character, and he's a strong person – but I don't think he's as strong as he wants to lead everybody to believe he is going into this weekend.
.... You're lying if you're saying there's no pressure on you after 10 weeks of being up there and trying to win your first championship. It's a lot easier to relax when you're winning races, (and) we've won two out of the last three and finished third.
POINT: Stewart. SCORE: Stewart 5, Edwards 2.
What about Tony?
Edwards: (Tony) has to be a little nervous – he's got a lot on his plate, got a lot of things going on. It would be abnormal for either of us not to be a little wound up about this thing and a little excited about it.
(The trash talk) is fun for you guys to talk about, but racing has a funny way of humbling people and just working out regardless of what's said. You can do all the talking in the world, whatever you want – but you get in that race car, and every one of us knows it's just based on how fast you go and what decisions you make.
FINAL TRASH TALK COMPETITION SCORE: Stewart 5, Edwards 3.