Kanye West will contribute an unannounced performance to Rihanna’s NBA All-Star Game halftime show, according to a report by Deadspin. “Unannounced” instead of “surprise,” because nothing Kanye does is ever really all that surprising — you wouldn’t classify Blake Griffin’s KIA as a surprise appearance, would you?
Ye did just release a video for “All of the Lights,” a song that features Rihanna, and co-star in a six-minute Nike video for Kobe Bryant’s new shoes. Kobe Bryant is a basketball player who is playing in tonight’s All-Star Game, in case I haven’t connected these dots explicitly enough.
As for Rihanna, she’s likely to sing “Only Girl in the World” and some of her other recent hits, probably wearing a self-aware mechanical apparatus that’s designed to look sort of like a tuxedo and sort of like a thong. The camera will linger with appreciation on her quads.
“All of the Lights” also features every other musician you’ve ever heard of, so the stage at the Staples Center could get crowded in a hurry if everybody decides to show up.