The NBA lockout took another turn on Tuesday: the league announced it has filed its own unfair labor practices complaint against the players' union and a federal lawsuit claiming that the union is threatening a "sham" decertification to file anti-trust litigation against the NBA. If this is all Latin to you and you'd really like to get back on the BBS to play your favorite MUD, then this post is just for you.
WELCOME TO NBA LOCKOUT 2K11!
WOULD YOU LIKE INSTRUCTIONS? TYPE [Y] FOR YES AND [N] FOR NO.
GREAT! WELCOME TO NBA LOCKOUT 2K11!
YOU ARE DAVID STERN, COMMISSIONER OF THE NATIONAL BASKETBALL ASSOCIATION.
YOUR LEAGUE, DESPITE BEING AS POPULAR AS EVER, IS LOSING HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS
OF DOLLARS PER YEAR.
YOUR AGREEMENT WITH PLAYERS, WHO MAKE AN AVERAGE SALARY OF $5 MILLION, HAS EXPIRED.
THEY DO NOT SEEM INTERESTED IN AGREEING TO MAJOR SALARY CONCESSIONS.
DO YOU LOCK OUT THE PLAYERS AND THREATEN TO CANCEL THE 2011-12 SEASON, OR
EXTEND THE AGREEMENT FOR ONE YEAR TO ATTEMPT TO WORK OUT A NEW DEAL?
TYPE [L] FOR LOCKOUT AND [X] FOR EXTENSION.
GREAT CHOICE! ONLY A WOMAN OR CHRIS BOSH WOULD OPT FOR MORE NEGOTIATIONS. HIT 'EM
WHERE IT HURTS!!
FACED WITH THE THREAT OF A CANCELED SEASON, PLAYERS DO NOT SEEM FAZED. IN FACT,
SEVERAL SIGN CONTRACTS TO PLAY IN EUROPE DURING THE LOCKOUT.
MEANWHILE, THEIR LEADER, DEREK FISHER, PERHAPS THE WORST STARTING POINT GUARD NOT NAMED
JONNY FLYNN, SEEMS DETERMINED TO LOOK SMART AND CLASSY DESPITE YOUR BEST EFFORTS TO
INTIMIDATE HIM AT THE NEGOTIATING TABLE. HE REALLY IS A COOL CUSTOMER. WHAT A RESOLUTE
ONE MONTH INTO THE LOCKOUT, THE FIRST NEGOTIATING SESSION IS SCHEDULED.
DO YOU OFFER A COMPROMISE [C] OR STICK TO YOUR GUNS AND MAKE NO CONCESSIONS [N]?
THE UNION MAKES THE SAME CHOICE AND DOES NOT OFFER A COMPROMISE SOLUTION. WHAT A BUNCH
OF BAD FAITH NEGOTIATORS.
THE LOCKOUT IS AT A STALEMATE. HOPE IS DWINDLING BY THE HOUR.
DO YOU CONTINUE NEGOTIATIONS IN HOPES THE INCREASING THREAT OF SEASON CANCELLATION
LEADS TO COMPROMISE [C] OR SUE THE PLAYERS FOR FAILING TO CONCEDE TO YOUR DEMANDS [S]?
I KNEW YOU WERE A BALLBUSTER!! GREAT CHOICE!
YOU HAVE NOW TOLD YOUR EMPLOYEES, MANY OF WHOM REMAIN UNDER CONTRACT FOR 1-4 MORE YEARS,
THAT YOU WILL NOT ALLOW THEM TO WORK UNTIL THEY AGREE TO GIVE BACK A SUBSTANTIAL
PORTION OF THEIR FUTURE SALARIES, AND YOU HAVE SUED THEM FOR REFUSING TO AGREE TO YOUR
CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE COMPLETED QUEST: IRON FIST.
YOU HAVE GAINED 50XP.
YOU HAVE GAINED 23 MILLION GIL.
YOU HAVE GAINED SWORD OF EXCESSIVE LEGAL SMITING.
To be continued ...