The riots are over in State College. Their least valuable player is this man, the worst rioter in the world.
So much is wrong here. What is Ed Kowalcyk, the former lead singer of Live, expecting to burn? That's newspaper. He has about fifteen seconds to get that newspaper underneath something flammable before it either burns to black feathers or flies down the street and catches someone's sweatpants on fire. Unless there is a stack of kerosene soaked logs directly behind him, this man is lighting the world's worst pinata on fire for about thirty seconds max.
He is also being photographed lighting this on fire. Your arson charge will be both feeble and documented for easy prosecution. Later, he would stand on top of an overturned lightpole. "Yeah, take that, pole!" he'd think, and then realize he was very bad at rioting just like his dad always said he'd be. Then, he'd cry.
(Via)



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