Howard Schnellenberger, Quote Machine At Large

My favorite portion of this unskippable piece on just what it is Howard Schnellenberger does now that he's a former college football coach:

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"What is this?" Schnellenberger says. "They want my Social Security number or something? They know I'm a public figure?"

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"I'm not being obnoxious," he says. "Just saying."

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He looks at the form, eyeballs it up and down, and signs his swooping signature with a flourish. One more glance at the paper in front of him.

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"I don't have a friggin' Z number," he says, handing it back

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I took the paper, empty save for his signature, and handed it back to Julie, the lady in charge of these sorts of things for the gym. She stared down the nearly blank form.

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ht EDSBS

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