EXT. Noon. Present Day.

A cacophony of chants, charged language and drawls provides a familiar Southern hum. Four men sit at a desk. They are smiling. One looks like your crazy Uncle Randy. Another has some kind of stuffed alligator for a hat. A third looks like some dude who would go to a Kenny Chesney concert. The fourth, nondescript, wears a blank stare.

ALLIGATOR MAN: Time to make our picks, here we go.

CRAZY UNCLE: Awwwww yeahhhhhhhh

KENNY CHESNEY BRO: papa john bass fishing skeet shooting with the car fox me and captain crunch riding go karts with pippa middleton and guy fieri in the hamptons let's go vols

There is a louder roar from the sea of cheese doodle-colored people serving as a backdrop.

"I Am A Real American" plays.

ALLIGATOR MAN: That's Smokey's music!

CRAZY UNCLE: rawerwerrggfffffffffffhhhh

CRAZY UNCLE: bewwwwwww

CHESNEY BRO: air bud and i on the moon riding razor scooters

ALLIGATOR MAN: [smiles]

End Scene.

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