SB Nation - Casey McMillan

A-Paki-Lypse Soon? Adam Robinson Shelved for the Season

Oops Pow Surprise — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 21:04:59 -0000

about 1 month ago: Iowa's Adam Robinson (32) is stopped Michigan State's Jerel Worthy during the second quarter of an NCAA college football game, Saturday, Oct. 24, 2009, in East Lansing, Mich. (AP Photo/Al Goldis)

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This just won't stop. Adam Robinson's ankle has exploded:

Redshirt freshman running back Adam Robinson likely will miss the rest of the regular season after suffering an ankle injury in Saturday's win against Michigan State.

He registered career-highs in both attempts (27) and rushing yards (109) against the Spartans.

"There's a chance we could get him back," Ferentz said, "but a running back with a bad ankle, it's not a good thing."

Ferentz likened Robinson's injury to the one that kept tight end Tony Moeaki out for several games this year.

This, of course, means the running back depth chart is as follows:

Brandon "Tackled as soon as he gets the handoff" Wegher
Paki O'Meara

I'm Paki O'Meara!

And that's it for healthy bodies. Jeff Brinson is still on crutches--though that didn't stop Ned--and Jewel Hampton has expressed no desire to play with a knee that's still about six months away from recovery. Pansy.

There are options, though none of them involve handing the ball to Casey McMillan and diving out of the way as he swats hapless defenders into Row 40. You know the NCAA would just make it illegal at halftime.

No, it looks like true freshman Brad Rogers is going to get some consideration. You may remember him from this season's recruiting class, checking in at 5'8" and a robust 230 pounds. Those numbers on a 2-star prospect don't sound like someone who's ready to step into a Big Ten backfield from day 1, but as Kirk Ferentz explained at his presser today, Rogers has made strides:

Q. Are Brad Rogers and Josh Brown in the mix?

COACH FERENTZ: Everybody is in the mix. If they are out there they are in the mix right now. I would say Rogers is ahead of Brown right now.

Q. What about Jeff Brinson?

COACH FERENTZ: He’s not – I think that probably could be the rest of the season he’ll be out, too.

Q. Nine games into a season, you would still take off a redshirt?

COACH FERENTZ: We traveled there last week, could not have for foreseen that kind of complication, but we traveled him and told him he may be going in the ballgame so be ready. Probably because he’s from Toledo, got four tickets to the game, so worked out perfectly.

But you know, if he’s got to go in, he’ll go in and do a good job. Really he’s impressed us over the last eight weeks. He came in a little heavy and a little out of shape but that’s not unusual for first-year players. He’s really worked hard and he looks 100% better than did he two months ago, so I’m really impressed with his attitude and his work ethics.

100% better than 2 stars is, like, 4 stars. Problem solved, bitches.

If Rogers can play, of course, he's in for a few carries; recall that Rogers was traveling to East Lansing with the team as a reward for his play in practice even before A-Rob was hurt. Further, Wegher hasn't shown any indication of being ready to take 20 snaps a game and be productive (though, as we mentioned earlier, it doesn't help that there's an unblocked tackler immediately on him every damn time). And as for O'Meara, well, that UNI game remains the only time this season an Iowa running back has lost a fumble. Not exemplary work, there.

So it'll probably be a tailback-by-committee approach from here on out until one of the Three Wise Men (note: we cannot vouch for the wisdom of any of the three running backs) establishes himself as the de facto number one. Let's hope the injury trend stops here; there aren't many people left on the offense that Iowa can afford to lose from here on out.

Bryan Bulaga Officially Out For Iowa State

Oops Pow Surprise — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 17:58:21 -0000

Good night, sweet prince?

Okay, you brought the gallons of gasoline and the matches, right? Okay, great. Let's get everyone here in a pile, pour the gasoline on ourselves, then just light this sumbitch on fire, because Bryan Bulaga, despite suffering no injury, is out for Iowa State.

From Ferentz, via On Iowa:

"Bryan Bulaga was hospitalized with an illness this past week and will not be available to play tomorrow," said Ferentz. "Bryan is doing much better, has been released and will accompany the team this weekend. We expect Bryan to return to his normal activities soon."

Rumors were all over the place up until Ferentz's announcement, so while the specifics still aren't known, at least we've got some idea of the situation. Not dying, traveling with the team, improving: all positive. Out for ISU: very, very negative.

A gent on the Hawks Nest who's been reliable in the past said this about the situation:

Today I watched Kyle Calloway, Dace Richardson, and even Dan Doering work at LT, along with a freshman named McMillan*. If it's true that he won't play....so much for o-line developing any continuity or cohesiveness yet. They did not look good today, but Binns and Clayborn were making things tough for everyone.

There were other nuggets, but there are so many practice-to-practice fluctuations in play that it's hard to read too much into "Wegher looked good today."

Either way, though, this is horrific news for Iowa. ISU doesn't exactly have a dominant rush end, but that only means that what was once a comical mismatch in terms of talent in Iowa's favor is now more of a wash. Considering the fact that Iowa's rushing game could use all the advantages it can get, "a wash at LT" won't suffice. ISU +6.5 is looking pretty enticing, isn't it?

*We really hope he means Casey McMillan, but it's far more likely he means Nolan MacMillan, who came in far more game-ready and suited for LT than Casey Mac, who is a volcano of a man who is best suited to playing all three interior line positions at once since he has four arms like Goro. We edited in the first names of the other linemen, so that way our blog engine can make it so you can click on them and it's fun.

The New Roster With Numbers For Freshmen Is Out. Yes, You Do Too Care

Oops Pow Surprise — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 17:28:08 -0000

Rivals released the updated roster for the 2009 iteration of the Hawkeyes, so's you can update your NCAA 2010 rosters and all. Oh, and there's vitals for the players as well. Height and weight, we mean, not blood pressure*.

First, the freshmen:

3 - Brandon Wegher (RB)
6 - Keenan Davis (WR)
9 - JoJo Pregont (WR)
13 - Josh Brown (DB)
18 - Micah Hyde (DB)
23 - Jordan Cotton (WR)
35 - Martin Hopkins (DL)
37 - Shane DiBona (Porn Star**)
38 - Brad Rogers (RB)
41 - Jake Reisen (FB)
50 - Drew Clark (OL)
59 - Conor Boffeli (OL)
70 - Brett Van Sloten (OL)
72 - Matt Murphy (OL, Mose)
75 - Scott Covert (DL)
76 - Nolan MacMillan (OL)
79 - Dominic Alvis (DE)
80 - Dakota Getz (TE)
83 - Stephane N'goumou (WR)
96 - Tyler Harrell (DL)

Cool stuff. Not much to take from the guys' heights and weights--for veterans, they're taken verbatim from last season's official roster--but Brandon Wegher is already at 206 pounds, which happens to be a pound heavier than the listed weight of one Dr. Pythons, Jordan Bernstine.

Other than that, the tallest players outside of the offensive line are... a punter and wideout, both 6'6" walkons. Eric Guthrie is the punter, and the lanky WR is one JoJo Pregont, who has an awesome name. Pregont turned down a scholarship to Illinois State to attend Iowa as a walk-on. Being that he's so tall, we're assuming he's lacking some top-end speed, which Doyle may or may not be able to imbue into the receiver. Guthrie, meanwhile, has the misfortune of spending two more seasons behind cannon-legged nutball junior Ryan Donahue.

So yeah, for now, Cotton's a WR, Wegher's a tailback and kick returner, and other than that, no surprises. God, the season needs to start already.

*Casey McMillan's blood pressure, if you were curious, is "leaded." This is no surprise, as he has not been declared street legal in decades.
**Or linebacker, if you want to be all factual and shit about it.

Casey McMillan Bails Out General Motors

Hawkeye State — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 12:46:25 -0000

We'll have much, much more on the invitation-only non-Spring Game later tonight (initial reports are not good). For now, mad props to BHGPal Mike Hlas, who took this picture while stalking players' parents during the scrimmage*:

That's right, folks: It's the tailgate of the Chevy Blazer used to transport Casey McMillan. We say "transport" because, technically, Casey Mac rides in an electrically-charged 12-foot cage hitched to the back, while his handlers sit in the backseat, tranquilizer guns always at the ready. Fortunately, they have only had to use them once, when he climbed a tree in Missoula.

McMillan's parents are clearly humble. If our offspring killed grizzly bears with his hands and could peel the roof off our SUV like a pop-top of Chunky Soup, we'd have a far more descriptive custom plate:

Any other ideas? Montana license plate generator here, comments below.

* -- Actually, we've been laughing at the visual of Hlas walking around the parking lot, taking pictures of license plates like the FBI agents at the Corleone wedding at the beginning of The Godfather, only to have his camera destroyed by an angry, drunk Ken O'Keefe. Unfortunately, there aren't any good shots of that on Google Images for us to photoshop. Bastards.

IOWA WAS ONE INCH AWAY FROM 18-0 IN THE BIG TEN LAST YEAR

Oops Pow Surprise — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 04:11:47 -0000

This is the face of perfection.

And that one inch just so happened to go across Jarryd Cole's ACL. Don't believe the insanely incendiary headline? I don't give a fuck, it's true. It's true because somebody way above my pay grade said it, so I'm in no position to question the truth. I'm not on that media filter tip, plus I have Iron Man on pause and I don't have three hours to spend trying to outthink anybody.

Anyway, here's what we're dealing with. At media day earlier this week, somebody asked starting point guard Jeff Peterson a simple question: how many more games would Iowa have won with injured power forward (and new captain) Jarryd Cole. Peterson's response, we're sure, was completely serious:

Asked at Iowa’s basketball media day Monday how many more games the Hawkeyes would have won in the Big Ten a year ago with a healthy Jarryd Cole on the court, the sophomore guard served up a lightning-quick answer.

"All of them. We would have won all of them. We’re putting that all on Jarryd,’’ Peterson said, flashing a smile.

ALL OF THEM! Where's the national media on this? In no way could Jeff Peterson have been joking, because athletes don't joke. As small-time athletes like us know, we've been in locker rooms, and they're more somber than a Supreme Court hearing. And that's after wins.

But Jarryd Cole is back, and GOOD LORD is he ready for play. I don't know what you were like at 19 years old, but it sure as shit wasn't this:

Lickliter said Cole has run a mile around 5 minutes, 30 seconds, usually where Lickliter wants his guards to run.

"When you say 'a hundred percent,' I'd like to be his hundred percent. I'd be pretty good," Lickliter said. "I think he's bench pressing over 300 pounds."

JESUS TITFUCKING RUSTY TROMBONING CHRIST, PETERSON WASN'T LYING. Jarryd Cole, at 6'7", 250 pounds, is a fucking freak of nature and we think he earned his captain's role by eating Tony Freeman without chewing. Go on, tell Cole he doesn't deserve to be a captain. See what happens. We'll even call your parents to tell them the bad news while Cole picks your intestines out of his teeth with a utility pole. Casey McMillan, I never thought I'd see the day, but you have met your match. Also, please do not kill me.

So this is it, Iowa. 18-0 is your benchmark for 2008. We'll take your word for it in April how you've done (champions, undoubtedly); it's not that we're fans, it's that we'll be spending the entire season in our bunker, fearful of the nuclear weapons necessary to stop the threat to the world that is Jarryd Cole.

NORTHWESTERN MYSTERY SOLVED

Oops Pow Surprise — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 14:16:03 -0000

Remember this iconic photo from last year's game?

Of course you do. Remember trying to figure out how in the hell that could actually happen and only hurting your brain instead? Yes, again, of course.

Fortunately, we at Black Heart Gold Lab Coat (a subsidiary of BHGP Conglomocorp) have used science! to figure it out, and trust us, the results are astonishing. Ladies and gentlemen...

...Casey McMillan threw him back in time.

We have uncovered conclusive evidence of this most heinous act below. Please, if there are children in the room, cover their eyes; going Beyond Photoshop is not for the squeamish.

THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED

As for this year's game, things don't bode well for Northwestern. MacMillan tossed a man through the fabric of the space-time continuum, and he's not even playing this year. So next season, when his redshirt is lifted, God only knows what he'll get his hands on. Put it like this, if a school bus filled with lava appears out of nowhere and falls on CJ Bacher this weekend, don't be surprised.