SB Nation - Brandon Myers

It's Not Plagiarism If You Link To It Holds Its Breath

Oops Pow Surprise — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 16:04:54 -0000

We thought the Superman cape meant you were impervious to this stuff, Jewel. We still think the Kryptonite kneepads were a horrible mistake.

Um... uh... uh-oh. There's an ominous tone around Iowa City these days, and it's all revolving around one Jewel Hampton. There was a Bleacher Report article so specious it's not even worth linking, but the underlying worries are still there. As near as we can tell, the out-loud whispers started with this ominous Tweet from HawkeyeNation's Jon Miller:

I think we are getting close to decision on Jewell. Based on very recent chatter I am hearing I would say 80prcnt chance won't play in 09.JM

No names attached to it other than Miller's own, and enough hedging on the 80% that he's in the clear no matter which way this ends up--hell, it's possible that Hampton and the coaches don't even know the endgame yet--but it's scary all the same.

Then there was this line from Ferentz on Chris Spielman's radio show on 97.1 in Columbus:

"We had high hopes for Jewel this year. He suffered a knee injury in the end of June, right before the Fourth of July break. Came back from that. Had a good month of July. Had a really good first part of camp and then re-injured a little bit about a week ago. We’ve held him out. We’re hoping to get him back out on the field this coming week and, I guess, like all of us, it’s touch and go. We’re hoping we can get him back out there, but at this point, we certainly have to prepare like there’s a possibility like he might not be there, too."

We can selectively emphasize different portions of that statement to give the impression that Ferentz thinks he's done, or we can make it seem like he's hedging as well and has no idea. Point is that there's ZERO indication that he'll be ready to rock when the season starts, and that is bad news bears.

AND OH WAIT, here's more from Ferentz via Rivals ($$$):

"We were hoping to get him back on the field this week. It didn't work out. We're shooting for next Sunday. Hopefully with a little bit of luck Jewel can get back out there and help us this year."

"If it doesn't work out, we'll go on without him. The good news is he has a redshirt year available if that takes place, but we're still hopeful we can get him on the field."

In other words: "His leg fell off during the Badwater Ultramarathon and vultures ate the leg and then a nuclear warhead that he ate for breakfast two days ago detonated in his lower intestine." Good night, sweet prince. So unless Brinson establishes himself as a #1--and again, there's ZERO indication of that, he's at best sharing carries with Paki Bomb, and you know how hard we're trying to talk ourselves into being okay with that.

But if memory serves us right, 12 years ago, Hayden Fry took a similar amount of time deciding between Rob Thein and Tavian Banks at tailback, and that ended up pretty well. So perhaps this lack of definitive comment is the staff's way of seeing how healthy Brinson and Hampton can get before they decide their fates for the 2009 season. We just worry that this somehow ends in one of the two running backs transferring since they can't get past the A-Paki-lypse in the depth chart. And if you don't think that could happen, um, two words for you good sir:

Did chills run down your spine? They should have.

Something seems very untoward about all this: Darren Rovell of CNBC posted a list of the athlete jerseys you can buy for each of the top 25 teams. There are no names on the jerseys, of course, but you know damn well what you're doing when you buy a Florida #15 jersey (Oh, you know what else you're doing? Putting a shitload of money into the pockets of many people who are not named Tim Tebow).

It's all part of the delicate ballet between schools and the NCAA selling their players without actually selling their players, and that in turn leads to some ambiguity when it comes to seeing who the jerseys are purported to belong to. Or, as Rovell puts it:

This list probably isn’t perfect because it was hard to eliminate past players who wore jerseys that are still being sold because they didn’t have the names on the back. Only one Web site, named the players with the jerseys (Iowa).

See, so it's--wait wait wait, run that by us again, please.

This list probably isn’t perfect because it was hard to eliminate past players who wore jerseys that are still being sold because they didn’t have the names on the back. Only one Web site, named the players with the jerseys (Iowa).

Sure enough, if you go to the Hawk Shop, here's how they phrase it:

Available in Black #12 (Stanzi), White #12 (Stanzi), and Black #27 (Hampton).

The "blood diamonds" of the NCAA. No, that comparison isn't at all unfairly hyperbolic and misleading. Why do you ask?

Now, look. We realize the untenable situation that colleges and athletes find themselves in. As good as it would be to sell these jerseys and pass a healthy amount of proceeds onto the athletes themselves, we get that the NCAA wants to protect ~~its utterly insane and exploitative cartel over the athletes that make it up~~ "amateurism," so that's out of the question. And a school definitely doesn't want unauthorized third parties to make any money off its athletes.

But what's odd is they're basically taking the stance of "nobody makes any money off the names of our athletes," not their likenesses. And while other schools walk the same line when it comes to selling jerseys, Iowa thinks it's perfectly okay to name the players? Now, I failed the bar after I answered every question "SUE THE BASTARDS" in neon orange crayon and used the bottom half of page 4 to roll a marijuana cigarette, but there must be some legally-educated types who read BHGP who can offer some cursory opinions as to why Iowa would be literally the only school in the top 25 who explicitly names players (and what legal lines a team like Iowa might theoretically be walking). We pay billable hours in empty beer cans, FYI.

Iowa Golf: Cooler names than the PGA tour: The Daily Iowan has a preview of Iowa's golf program, which placed 17th in the nation last year. Russell, did you realize that? No, I did not realize that. But more than that, we really like the names of the people on the club. They might be made up. To wit:

The Hawkeyes finished 17th at the NCAA championships in Toledo, Ohio, playing in their first postseason action since 1995. Even after the success, Hankins stressed that this year’s squad is a new team — especially after losing its team captains, including standout Cole Peevler.

"We lost Cole, and that’s a huge blow," junior Vince India said. "But we all seem to be playing really well right now, and I don’t see any reason why we can’t make it back to where we were last year."

AWW! I want my name to be Vince India! Or Steve Texas. Or The Evil Dr. Murdergroin. I guess the last one has nothing to do with geography.

Thirty-three! Thirty-three Hawkeyes! Ah, ah, ah! Scott Dochtermann provides the most extensive update yet on the former Hawkeyes trying to hang on in the No Fun League. There are a few starters and a shitload of backups and practice roster fodder. This is hardly an indictment of the Iowa program and more like an indication of the quick nature of most NFL careers. In fact, it's a testament to the staying power of guys like Casey Wiegmann, Mike Goff, Ladell Betts--hell, even Bob Gallery. After all, the NFL often stands for something else: Not For Long.

We digress. Definitely give the list a look, if for no other reason than the insane amount of links Dochtermann added. It's like a week's worth of INPs, and face it, you're so football-starved that you'd love to know that Brandon Myers is impressing people in Oakland with his pass-catching. See.

QUICK HITZ (get it because there are tackles in football and they do not take very long):

11W are quietly running through their inventory of victory dances in their head after USC announces that they're putting a true freshman at QB. Good god, do not let Ohio State win that game. If you thought their fans were insufferable louts before...
Maize N Brew (which we think is the "street" way to spell "Mays in Blue," or in Algonquin, "Michigan") thinks the Wolverines' Jumbotron is pathetic (we agree; hell, Iowa State agrees). Time to do something about it.
The Summer of George continues apace... if by "George" we mean "way more recruits committing to Iowa than usual." Welcome aboard, Don Shumpert and Christian Kirksey. Your list of Iowa commits grows to 13; with the small class, Ferentz might be done recruiting by Christmas, and that's even if he takes most of the season off from gathering commitments. Caring about recruiting, by the way, is still creepy.
Last, but not least, please do not set your husband's penis on fire. It could kill him, and that's not really what you wanted, is it?

An Early Look: Iowa

Sam @ WWAHT — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 14:00:16 -0000

Ah, the memories...

I did an interview not too long ago in which I said that I, unlike most college football fans my age, have teams that I root for outside of Ohio State. I just never grew out of that habit. Texas, despite the heartache they've given me, is one, and Iowa is the other. I like Iowa. Really, I do. Not in just a "they gon' be good this year hurrr" way, but in an I-genuinely-like-the-football-program way. Like us, they hail from a state many consider "flyover country", and since as a result they aren't one of the top destinations in college football for big-name recruits, they're a player-development-oriented team, as Hawkeye State from BHGP will later explain. Their entire program rests on the shoulders of their coaching staff; most of the guys they trot out each Saturday do not have the same level of innate ability as some of the guys on Penn State's, Ohio State's and Michigan's respective benches, but they still win, and heck, they've shown up in OOC games quite a bit more often that the conference's big dogs, and that's a plus in my book. Despite not having the best hand on the table, talent-wise, they win enough to keep the denizens happy. Even though I hate the team that inspired them, I love the uniforms too.

For a while there, I thought Kirk Ferentz had lost control of his program. The unbelievable string of arrests, the disturbing sex scandal, and a 19-18 overall record from 2005 to 2007 led me to believe the wheels had come off the wagon, or that at the very least, were threatening to. 2008 did not prove me entirely wrong; Iowa still lost 4 games - including mistifying losses to Pitt, Northwestern and Illinois - but managed to make a bowl game and beat an SEC team. Sure, that SEC team was about as threatening as a bag of dickless weasels, given that it was South Carolina, but they won their bowl game, which more than anyone else in the conference could say. 2009 is a pivotal year for the Hawkeyes, and it's pivotal for many of the same reasons the year will be pivotal for Penn State. The Hawkeyes also have to prove that an earlier malaise is officially behind them, and in doing so prove that they belong in the conference's top tier. They may even be competing with the Lions for the spot vacated - for now - by the Michigan Wolverines. Losing Shonn Greene doesn't help, but as you will see, there are reasons for optimism among the Hawkeye faithful.

Iowa players you should care about:

If you've been living under a rock since the bowl season, breathe a sigh of relief: Shonn Greene is gone. But the Iowa running back situation isn't quite as desperate as it seemed a year ago, when the prospect of Starter: Paki O'Meara horrified the Hawkeye masses prior to Shonn Greene's triumphant arrival. Looking to fill Greene's Shaq-sized 1800-yard back shoes will be Jewel Hampton, provided. Hampton played pretty well in spot duty last year, carrying the ball 91 times for 5.1 yards a pop. He has to stay healthy, and that's not going so well. The passing game revolves around Ricky Stanzi, who has given Iowa football something it has sorely lacked since Drew Tate's sophomore year with consistent play at the quarterback position, but Derrell Johnson-Koulianos needs to get himself back in the good graces of the coaching staff, who have placed him third (!) on the fall depth chart. Ferentz isn't a total idiot, so I imagine Koulianos will get back on the field, in a starting capacity, and he'll do it by September 5th.

Iowa's defense was solid last year, and the fact that seven of the top ten tacklers return may may you a bit queasier about the game, but remember: two of the best players on last year's defense, Mitch King and Matt Kroul, are goners. Iowa won't find anyone who'll even approximate their interior dominance, but if they can just get close enough to it, they're a lock to be a top-3 Big Ten defense. Pat Angerer - who continues a proud Iowa tradition of fantastically-named defenders like Klinkenborg and Humpal - is the leader of the defense.

Fun with statistics:

I do not doubt that Ricky Stanzi is good, but I must admit, I smirked a bit when I saw that 8 of his 14 touchdown passes came against FIU, Indiana and Minnesota.

With the departure of Andy Brodell and Brandon Myers, Iowa loses 37 percent of its receving production from last year. Might not seem like much, but Myers notched 34 grabs on the year last year, and the next-most productive receiver caught just 11. The passing attack will rely more on Johnson-Koulianos than ever.

As good as Iowa's defense was last year, the team as a whole notched just seventeen sacks on the season, five of which left with King and Kroul.

My prediction: Ohio State and Iowa have a quite a bit in common this year - quarterbacks looking to improve on breakout first-year seasons, a star runningback being replaced with a capable back-up and a spectacular defense that might end up being sub-par in one key area: the defensive interior. While I expect Ohio State to find a fairly good replacement to Nader Abdallah, it seems Iowa is just going to throw in a batch of random bodies alongside Karl Klug and hope someone does something other than breathe. Iowa's defense will still be very good, but it almost has to take a hit with the departure of "Kroul and Unusual Punishment", and I'm banking on that. At the very least, I'm hoping it does take a hit, because Iowa's '08 defense was statistically superior to Ohio State's, though it's doubtful they played an offense as good as USC's or Texas'. Expect this game to look a lot like the trip to Happy Valley the week prior, only this time, Ohio State will be able to pass its way out of an early deficit to secure a 24-16 win.

A Hawkeye's Thoughts: Hawkeye State from BHGP was kind enough to give us his thoughts on the game, and Iowa's season in general.

1. Give me one reason the Big Ten should fear Iowa in 2009.

Which team in the top half of the final Big Ten standings returns 18 of 23 starters from a year ago, including five all-Conference selections, a quarterback with a year of experience under his belt, the conference's best offensive lineman (and arguably the best line in general), and six of a defensive back seven that led the conference in interceptions. In fact, only Minnesota has more returning starts, and they're still coached by Tim Brewster. Inexperienced Iowa is scary for us. Experienced Iowa is scary for you.

2. Name a player whose name opposing fans should keep in mind when discussing Iowa. Preferably one we don't already know about..

The beauty of the current Iowa depth chart is there are so few unknown quantities: There are only 3 starters to replace on each side of the ball, and the openings on offense have ready-made, experienced replacements. If you need someone you haven't heard of, watch for Broderick Binns, a defensive end. It looks increasingly likely that one of Iowa's returning ends will move inside as a replacement at defensive tackle and open a spot for Binns, who stood out in rotation duty during the second half of last season and has been described as "unblockable" this fall by the staff. Iowa lost Mitch King and Matt Kroul, but it's not completely out of the question that the defensive line will be better against the pass and competent against the run. Binns will likely be the key.

3. Taking off the black and gold rec specs for a minute - what do you think Iowa's record will be in 2009?

I'm saying 8-4, followed by a bowl win. Ferentz made a good point last week: It's possible - maybe even likely - that Iowa is a better team this season but doesn't have the record to show for it. Road games against Iowa State, Penn State, Michigan State, Wisconsin, and Ohio State are all certainly losable, and the home contests against Northwestern and Michigan are far from gimmies. I can't see Iowa getting through the road schedule with less than three losses, and it's certainly possible they lose a fourth or drop a game at Kinnick. With that said, getting Ohio State late in the schedule gives the Hawks a shot to repeat the Penn State upset from last season; Ferentz-era Iowa teams show near-uniform improvement over the course of the year, and getting them late in the season is a curse generally reserved for Wisconsin and Minnesota.

4. Was Kirk Ferentz ever genuinely on the hot seat in Iowa city? If so, did last season cool it off quite a bit?

No, not really; if he was, he's not anymore. There is a small but vocal minority of the fanbase who call the postgame show and break into hysterics after every loss, but they're not any real threat to the throne. Iowa football, by the very nature of the recruiting base, is a player-development-heavy operation. It's inevitable that, if players don't develop as expected and/or scholarship limits and player attrition force Iowa to field a young lineup, there will be down cycles. That is precisely what happened in 1988-89, when a national championship contender with 29 wins in 3 years, went 11-10-3. It happened in 1992-94, when a 10-1-1 team was followed by three consecutive .500 seasons. And it happened 2006 and 2007, as off-the-field issues decimated the ranks and the most highly-touted (and now clearly most disappointing) recruiting class in school history flamed out. Those with a long view of Iowa football, who have some historical perspective, understand that and refrain from breaking out the torches and pitchforks.

5. Make an off-the-cuff prediction for the Ohio State game.

The Iowa defensive line, never great at getting to the quarterback but always disciplined in containment, stops Pryor from scrambling outside/running the pistol option, and forces him to throw. Given what I saw from your quarterback last year, your returning receivers, and the November date, I feel good about any game where Terrelle Pryor has to throw the ball more than 20 times. Hampton runs effectively behind that line, Stanzi throws as necessary, and Iowa squeaks out a 21-17 win.

That, or we lose by 40.

Pryor has his share of doubters, doesn't he? Nick Siciliano, your time is now.

Assume the Position 2009: Tight End

Hawkeye State — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 01:33:12 -0000

It's about that time again. For the next three months, BHGP will be previewing this year's Iowa Hawkeyes, position-by-position. Naturally, as the earth revolves around the sun, things will change. Therefore, we're starting with the position where we are most certain, and ending with the position of which we are least certain. To date:

1. Quarterback
2. Offensive Tackle
3. Safety
4. Linebacker

Tonight: Tight End

I'll give you a topic: The Flyin' Hawaiian is neither flying nor Hawaiian. Discuss.

In normal circumstances, tight end would be a top three ATP selection. A top-flight senior returning for his ~~nineteenth~~ fifth season, ordained as the starter two years ago (wow, did that jackass get it wrong) with the vexatious almagam of route-running/pass-catching/linebacker-blocking ability needed from an Iowa tight end and no real competition from below, would look like a certain starter for all 12 weeks.

Funny how a broken hand, dislocated elbow, broken foot (x2), strained calf, pulled hamstring, and concussion can change things.

The Starter

Tony Moeaki (#81, 6'4", 250, Senior) - I think it's safe to say that Tony Moeaki is the biggest wild card on this year's squad. There is no doubting his God-given abilities; when healthy, he has been that rare member of the Class of 2005 that has actually lived up to the hype. Two seasons ago, he made JC6 look like Dan Marino in both players' signature game at Iowa, the 35-0 shellacking of an admittedly inferior Syracuse. Moeaki caught 8 passes for 112 yards and 3 scores that day, then had his arm asplode into 29 pieces two weeks later against Wisconsin and missed the rest of the campaign. In 2008, he missed 5 games completely and played sparingly in 5 others; essentially, his entire season was Michigan State, Minnesota, and the Outback Bowl. Sadly, a player formerly known as the tight end version of Cris "just catches touchdowns" Carter only recorded one score last season (against Minnesota, of course, because everyone scored against Minnesota). He then sat out the spring after another surgery on the foot that kept him out most of the season.

In 2007, Moeaki's absence was one of the primary causes for the collapse of the offense, as Brandon Myers was quite clearly not yet ready for prime time. Last year, Moeaki's absence turned Myers into an NFL (well, Raiders) draft pick. Given Reisner's lack of experience, it's 2007 all over again. If Moeaki is healthy and KOK keeps calling that stupid roll-one-way-throw-it-back-the-other-way-like-we're-playing-motherfucking-Madden-99 tight end screen pass, he'll be the straw that stirs the drink. ~~When~~ If he's hurt, we'll find out just what we have in the tank. Let's just hope, for everyone's sake, that Tony can finally survive an entire season in one piece.

The MAS*H Unit

Allen Reisner (#82, 6'3", 235, Junior) - Let's face it: He's going to play, and not just garbage time. All things considered, that might not be a bad thing. Reisner, a universal 2-star from Cedar Rapids Marion, learned at the foot of Moeaki and Myers for the past two seasons and got limited snaps last season as the de facto backup in Moeaki's absence. He caught 11 passes last year, all in the five games where Moeaki couldn't play. What he lacked in quantity, he made up for in quality: He averaged 18 yards per reception and picked up a late touchdown against Wisconsin. His stat line actually stands up well against Moeaki's; put the two together and it's a good season for a tight end.

Should See the Field

Brad Herman (#39, 6'5", 242, Sophomore) - Let's run through the checklist, shall we?

Under-the-radar recruit from small town? CHECK.
Talks constantly about the strength and conditioning program? CHECK.
Shows up on campus, immediately puts on 15 pounds? CHECK.
Despite being stuck behind logjams at tight end and linebacker, burns redshirt and plays special teams as a true freshman, just so he can hit people? CHECK.
Adds another 10 pounds before the start of fall practice? CHECK.

I think we have ourselves a winner, folks. Herman was the rare 3-star recruit who nobody wanted. Finally, he sent a game tape to Iowa and had an offer 5 days later. Since the moment he hit campus, the coaches have raved about his play (in that, they have mentioned him more than once despite the fact he's only on special teams; there's never too much raving from Ferentz and Co.) It looks like the experiment with linebacker is over; given his size and the depth at that spot, it's probably a wise move. When Moeaki finally finishes his starcrossed career this fall, Reisner will get his shot for one season, but make no mistake: Herman is the heir apparent. Look for him this season. He'll be the one running pass patterns in a linebacker's jersey.

Kyle Spalding (#30, 6'5", 250, Senior) - OK, so he's probably not going to play (he's sharing a number with Brett Greenwood, and one of those things is not like the other), but the guy is a senior 4-year walk-on who has never stepped foot on the field during a game, let alone caught a pass. That kind of dedication to the program, without the smallest of rewards whatsoever, deserves a mention. Plus his mugshot is positively sublime.

Welcome To The NFL, Part 1: The Drafteds

Oops Pow Surprise — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 20:30:09 -0000

So, Iowa got a few guys drafted. Four is good, though we were really hoping for five or six, and at least one guy (Shonn) going on Saturday. That didn't happen, but all in all, good times.

This never gets old.

Money is green, and Greene is money: Congrats to the Jets, who said, for all intents and purposes, "screw the rest of the draft; we want Shonn Greene right now." At the start of the 3rd round, the Jets' front office sent every remaining pick but one to the Lions for the first pick of the day, then immediately scooped up Greene. He'll be stepping into a situation where Thomas Jones is getting his bitch on (and kinda for good reason; base salary of $900,000? Jeez), and the only other tailback worth a crap is Leon Washington. Now the only questions are from whom Greene takes carries, and how many.

Rex Ryan and Shonn Greene are a match well made; consider these two quotes:

"He was the best player that was on our board," Jets Coach Rex Ryan said. "In our opinion, it wasn’t close.

"He’s a big, powerful running back. We want to have a little ground and pound."

"The game of football is a physical sport. That’s why I enjoy it so much," Greene told reporters. "I love contact. It’s violent, it’s quick, it’s fast. That’s just the nature of my game, how I like to play the game."

Considering that Jones is 31 in August and about to price himself out of the league--there's not much of a market for slowing tailbacks who command 12-year-veteran money, which Jones ought to be at the end of his contract --it looks like this is a situation where Greene can thrive for years, especially since his knees are younger than his 24 years suggest. Proud ovation for Greene and the Jets.

Fletch lives: We're still in shock as to how Bradley Fletcher could have improved - not even from freshman to senior, but junior to senior - to the point that he's going in the early third round. But sure enough, right after Greene went, the Rams said "oh yeah, Iowa's got some guys"* and took Fletcher with the 66th pick.

Todd McShay immediately killed the pick, using the usual scout-talk overreaction that makes us wonder why Fletcher even plays football in the first place:

Fletcher was the biggest reach. While he's a big, physical corner, he lacks ideal range and is not an overly instinctive playmaker, so I'm not sure he'll ever be more than another sub-package DB on a roster filled with plenty of them already.

Easy there, Todd. Fletcher was also widely considered the best cover-2 corner at the Senior Bowl; the truth likely lies somewhere in the middle. Since we're horribly biased, of course, we'll say "fuck that truth" and demand that ESPN add the phrase "who is covered in Awesomesauce" after Fletcher's name in perpetuity in compensation for such a greivous slight.

A much better selection than his twin sisters, Mary-Kate and Ashley: After a few dozen picks in which we wondered why the hell Unusual Punishment hadn't been drafted yet, Seth Olsen went to Denver with the 132nd pick, late in the 4th round.

You let that belly HANG, brother!

We're not sure he's got the lateral quickness to play tackle and stop an elite pass rusher-- as a matter of fact, we're kind of sure that's one reason why Ferentz plugged him in at guard-- but tackle seems to be where MHR's analysis is projecting him anyway. We'll be very interested to see what kind of playing time Olsen earns, where, and what he does with it.

Um… thank you?: Normally, when a team trades up to take a player, they're so convinced that he's the best player available that he's worth multiple picks to get on the roster. The assumption, though, is that said team's scouting staff is A: competent, B: a staff at all, and C: anybody other than Al Davis.

After two truly miserable selections to start the draft--it's incredible when you take 2009's Troy Williamson at the #7 pick and that's not even your worst move of the first day by a long shot--the Raiders slogged through an uneventful Day 2 before trading their 7th pick and next year's 6th (or something like that) to get TE Brandon Myers. That would usually be an indication that the Raiders think Myers is a lock to make the final roster, but again, the Al Davis thing. Anymore, we're genuinely surprised Davis selected actual, eligible, human football players with every pick, and didn't finally snap and draft his cat. Mr. Snugglestein has the fluid hips and lateral speed for the next level, etc. etc.

But we digress. Myers has a plausible shot at a roster spot, considering the Raiders' TE situation consists of three corpses named Zach Miller, Tony Stewart, and Darrell Strong. We've only ever heard of one of them; that'd be Miller, who we picked up off waivers in fantasy football to fill a bye week slot a couple years ago, then immediately dropped after he contributed zero catches for zero yards. Fuck you Zach Miller.

Miller, seen here playing football like an asshole.

Either way, we hope Myers brings along a wooden stake, as it's entirely possible that he'll need to slay Al Davis in order to save himself from becoming one of the undead.

And then the draft ended, and Mitch King, who we were pretty sure would be picked somewhere around the middle of the draft, was still a free agent. NFL teams can be goddamn stupid sometimes.

Chicago Bears Draft Update

Adam T — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 19:00:45 -0000

With the Cutler deal over most it is a bit harder to project what and where the Bears will go with their 2nd round pick (#49 overall). Most think that wide reciever is a must, but what if all the guys worth this pick are off the board? Do they go safety, defensive line?

Here is a look at known or expected visits and workouts .

Friday - Juaquin Iglesias, WR, Oklahoma

Pre-draft visits

Al Afalava, Safety, Oregon State
ADDED APRIL 4 Aaron Brown, Running back, TCU
Jason Chery, Wide receiver, Louisiana-Lafayette
Maurice Crum Jr., Linebacker, Notre Dame
Derek Kinder, Wide receiver, Pitt
T.J. Lang, Offensive lineman, Eastern Michigan
ADDED APRIL 4 Ellis Lankster, Cornerback, West Virginia
Henry Melton, Defensive end, Texas
Brandon Myers, Tight end, Iowa
Rich Ohrnberger, Guard, Penn State
Anthony Scirrotto, Safety, Penn State
Jamaal Westerman, Defensive end, Rutgers
Nathan Williams, Linebacker, Murray State

Private workouts

Russell Allen, Linebacker, San Diego State
Eben Britton, Offensive tackle, Arizona
Kenny Britt, Wide receiver, Rutgers
John Gill, Defensive tackle, Northwestern
~~Darrius Heyward-Bey, Wide receiver, Maryland~~ canceled
ADDED APRIL 4 Juaquin Iglesias, Wide receiver, Oklahoma
Phil Loadholt, Offensive tackle, Oklahoma
Lance Louis, Guard, San Diego State
Sherrod Martin, Safety, Troy
Mohamed Massaquoi, Wide receiver, Georgia
Michael Mitchell, Safety, Ohio
Hakeem Nicks, Wide receiver, North Carolina
Richard Quinn, Tight end, North Carolina
Mike Wallace, Wide receiver, Ole Miss*

Get together (we're not sure if these will be visits or private workouts)

Todd Boeckman, Quarterback, Ohio State*
Brian Robiskie, Wide receiver, Ohio State

You Like Me! You Really Like Me!

Hawkeye State — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 17:00:06 -0000

The 2008 Iowa football team is winning awards like Titanic Gladiator (yeah, definitely Gladiator). Shonn Greene and Mitch King won the big awards, but they weren't the only players recognized. Now, for awards given at an earlier ceremony:

First Team All-Conference
Shonn Greene, RB (media (unanimous) & coaches)*
Seth Olsen, G (media & coaches)
Brandon Myers, TE (coaches)
Mitch King, DL (media & coaches (unanimous))

Second Team All-Conference
Rob Bruggeman, C (media & coaches)
Bryan Bulaga, T (coaches)
Kyle Calloway, T (media)
Matt Kroul, DL (media)
Pat Angerer, LB (media & coaches)
Amari Spievey, CB (coaches)
Ryan Donahue, P (coaches)

Honorable Mention All-Conference
Kyle Calloway, A.J. Edds, Bradley Fletcher, Matt Kroul (coaches)
Bryan Bulaga, Ryan Donahue, A.J. Edds, Bradley Fletcher, Brett Greenwood**, Brandon Myers, Amari Spievey (media)

That's one hell of a haul, considering Iowa had just two honorable mentions last season. Congrats to one and all.

* -- Voters are allowed to choose two running backs for first team all-conference consideration. Greene didn't get a unanimous selection from the coaches for first team all-Big Ten, which means one coach inexplicably had him third or worse in the conference. It's either the result of a massive oversight (unlikely) or a petty, vindictive, childish vote by someone with a vendetta against Iowa. Whoever did it should be relieved of their duties as a voter on these awards, a coach in this conference, and a living being on this planet.

I'm looking at you, Fitzgerald.

** -- We don't get Greenwood's inclusion, either, but we're not going to rain on his parade. Besides, the Big Ten's official website has his name misspelled. That's just cruel.