Remember Jeff George? He was the original gunslinger. Rex Grossman before Rex Grossman. Coulda thrown the ball over those mountains right there if Coach woulda put him in. Still could, too, if the Colts would just sign him to replace Peyton Manning.
As the L.A. Times' Sam Farmer tweeted Monday afternoon, "Just talked to Jeff George, who lives in Indy and says he could pick up that Colts offense in a matter of days." Of course, ol' Uncle Rico probably believes he could pick up any NFL offense in a matter of days.
But there's a special history between George and Indianapolis, and if Indy's going to be terrible this year, they may as well commemorate the "No Trim 'Till The Colts Win"-era. A reminder that as great as they were with Peyton, the Colts were always more fun when they were the worst team in the league and their fans weren't having sex.
News anchor: "Sportswriters say the team has the worst offense in the NFL, but these days, their fans aren't doing much scoring, either. You see as long the team keeps losing its games, the fans are losing their lovers."
[cut to radio host]
Host: "We have kicked off a campaign, it's called 'No trim till the Colts win', and we ask you to refrain from any sexual activity for the duration of the Colts' string of losses."
It only gets better from there.
BRING BACK JEFF GEORGE, AND BRING BACK COLT SHOWERS.