This Week In GIFs: Football was invented by a bored Satan

It's Week Four Million of the football season, and the sport just keeps getting cooler, funnier, and dumber. Vote, and help us determine the greatest animated GIF of the week.

Welcome, everyone, to Week 24 of THIS WEEK IN GIFs. Over the last week, we had a short window in which baseball had concluded but the NBA had not quite started. That means an all-football episode of THIS WEEK IN GIFs!

We have our favorites, of course. Here, I stump for my favorite GIF with fellow GIF enthusiasts Matt Ufford and Dan Rubenstein:


DERRIUS VICK

Derrius-vick_medium

(Via @bubbaprog)

We don't talk about the value of chryons much in this space, and I guess this presents the perfect opportunity. As legendary as MORTIFIED MICHIGAN PUNTER was, wouldn't it have been even better if they'd docked a stoic headshot of the dude in the corner while his real-life face went all BLUUUUURP? Our friend the Raptor still would have crushed him, of course, but still.

ANTONIO BROWN

Backwards_running_medium

(Via Bill Hanstock's Week in Worst)

I touched on this on the video, but to elaborate: I love showboating, even if it means my own team is the one getting sonny'd. Perhaps that just means that I've been beaten down enough as a sports fan to not have any Team Pride or whatever the Hell left in me, but if that's the case, I'm better for it.

Because this way, I get to enjoy Antonio Brown running backwards almost as quickly as he he was running forwards. It's simultaneously hilarious and impressive, a combination we very rarely see in GIFs around here.

PHILIP RIVERS

(Via valued SB Nation commenter smk73)

At this point, Philip Rivers is a serious GIF Hall of Fame candidate, y'all.

I get Rivers' first "throw" motion. I mean, it was a bad idea, but he was actually trying to throw a football. I get what he was trying to do.

Not so sure about the second "throw" gesture. Or maybe it was a "spike" gesture? To Ryan Clady, a guy who was ineligible to do either of those things, and whose back was turned to him?

Definitely not sure of the third "throw" gesture, which Rivers gives to Clady while Clady is swallowed up by a tackler and in the process of hitting the ground.

In 10 years, once he finally mimes his way out of the NFL, look for Rivers' first blues-pop album, "Throw Gestures." He'll be wearing Wayfarers and a bomber jacket and leaning over the saddle of the cheapest Harley he can find. The back cover will show him in black and white, standing against a brick wall by himself and laughing. It will sell 428 copies and land him an interview on All Songs Considered, which he will use to talk about how his cats are doing and how one of them is nice but the other can be a real handful sometimes.

VICK BALLARD

Ballard_medium

(Via Brandon Porath)

I don't know who first came up with the end zone corner boundary rules, but that person is a mad genius. Thinking of in-bounds territory as three-dimensional space gives ball carriers just a little more room to work with, and allows for crazy shit like Vick Ballard is doing here.

THROW-HAPPY OFFICIAL

Lolrefeagles_medium

(Via Ryan Van Bibber)

u suck at cornhole bro

JARED ALLEN

Allenfight_medium

(Via Ryan Van Bibber)

I'm sort of a hypocrite: I am categorically opposed to fighting and violence, unless it's between athletes. Maybe that's because a) they almost never sustain serious injury as a result of fighting, b) they're big dudes who can take it, and c) they walk in with some measure of expectations and know that, yes, they might possibly end up fighting.

These fights are generally the culmination of an hour or so of trash-talking, so I really don't know who was being the punk-ass here. Probably both of them. I will say, though, that fighting a guy without a helmet, while YOUR helmet is still on, is some PUNK-ASS SHIT.

BRO HAS ROPE

I-got-a-rope_medium

(Via @bubbaprog)

Bro has rope. Brope. This GIF is silly and will get like 14 votes.

CHIEFS SPECIAL TEAMS

Succopfaker_medium

One of the freedoms of being a 1-6 (now 1-7) team is that you get to pull out all the stops, Open The Whole Playbook, et cetera. Your team can basically become this big, steaming, bubbling laboratory, in which you get to experiment with all sorts of things.

One of those things, if you're the Chiefs: a double-fake onside kick attempt. Strangely, it almost worked. For their next experiment, I'd like Jamaal Charles to wedge the football in his face mask as tightly as he can and try to run upfield that way. Just sort of feel that out and see how that goes.

VOTE!

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