Super Bowl 2013: Most Googled Super Bowl questions

USA TODAY Sports

You have questions about the Super Bowl, and I have answers about the Super Bowl.

Who? What? When? Where? Why? And sometimes How? Frankly, I'm a little sick and tired of treating How like it's different or less important just because it starts with an H instead of a W. If we're going to be that picky about word choices, then I guess we should have called it Wow or Whow with a silent W. Otherwise, How is probably a more important question than When or Where. We know when the Super Bowl is (February 3rd, 2013) and where the Super Bowl is (New Orleans) but isn't the more important question... How the Super Bowl is?

Deep stuff.

You have asked many questions regarding the Super Bowl through the internet tool known as Google. Thanks to Google giving us great suggestions (but sometimes crappy life advice. Thanks a lot, Google. I should have remembered that websites still don't understand human emotions) I can tell exactly what it is that you are searching for and the questions that you're asking. Now let me take a moment to try and give you the answers you seek. Even if you just want to know how the Super Bowl is doing.

'Super Bowl' suggestions

'Super Bowl winners' -

That's easy. I've spent a lot of time on the Super Bowl over the last two weeks. Here are the 46 winners:

Packers Packers Jets Chiefs Colts Cowboys Dolphins Dolphins Steelers Steelers Raiders Cowboys Steelers Steelers Raiders 49ers Redskins Raiders 49ers Bears Giants Redskins 49ers 49ers Giants Redskins Cowboys Cowboys 49ers Cowboys Packers Broncos Broncos Rams Ravens Patriots Bucs Patriots Patriots Steelers Colts Giants Steelers Saints Packers Giants

Any more brainbusters?

'Super Bowl 2012' -

Ugh, that's SO yesteryear! The Giants upset the Patriots 21-17. New York became the first team in NFL history to win the Super Bowl after being outscored during the regular season. You got to love the NFC East for letting the Giants into the playoffs!

'Super Bowl time' -

6:30 EST on CBS. It will be preceded by six hours of pregame coverage. No, I'm being serious.

'Super Bowl food' -

People love the heck out of eating but especially during the Super Bowl (or any other time to make an excuse to eat too much food. My work had a potluck for when we switched from Notes email to Outlook). In fact, SBNation wrote a whole crapload of articles relating to Super Bowl recipes. I wrote this one about Jello Shots. It'll get ya drunk.

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Now onto the questions:

'Where?'

If you Google "Where Super Bowl" it will actually suggest terribly-worded questions like 'Where Super Bowl 2013" and "Where Super Bowl" as well as "Where Super Bowls Were Played" which sounds like the name of some very inspirational sports movie.

If you want to know "Where is the Super Bowl" this year, then the answer is that it is being held in New Orleans for the tenth time. The last time it was played in the Superdome, the Patriots beat the Rams in one of the biggest upsets in Super Bowl history.

Next year, the Super Bowl is held on February 2nd at MetLife Stadium in New Jersey. Joe Flacco, Jersey native, thinks that's stupid. You don't "go to the Jersey Shore, betch" unless it's summer.

"When?"

If you Google "When Is" then the first suggestion right now is "When is Super Bowl 2013" followed by Easter, Thanksgiving, and "When is the end of the world". The latter could always eliminate the necessity of the former suggestions. There's still time for an apocalypse before the Super Bowl this year! /crosses fingers

(The first hit to that end of the world question is actually a link to nasa.gov, because they felt that really needed to explain why the world didn't end on December 21st.)

The Super Bowl is February 3rd in the evening on the east coast and in the afternoon on the west coast. Some other time of day on the west coast of Africa.

"What?"

There are still people that need to know what the Super Bowl actually is. "What is Super Bowl Sunday" is a top suggestion on Google and the answer is "The Super Bowl is the championship game of the National Football League (NFL), the premier association of professional football." My only question to anyone that needed to ask that question was how they even heard of the Super Bowl in the first place.

Are you five? I suppose it makes sense if you're five. Kids that are five are controlling the internet. Wait, I just said "kids" and "internet" in the same sentence. I'm just gonna go sit over there.

"What Super Bowl..."

"What Super Bowl is it?" Super Bowl XLVII, or, Super Bowl 47 if you don't know what those extra letters are all about. (There is no other reason to really know what they are about. We did a good job of inventing and then transitioning to numbers.)

"What Super Bowls did the Packers win?" 1, 2, 31, and 45. There were longer breaks in between wins than you might have thought.

"Why?"

Why is a funny question to ask about the Super Bowl, but I did it anyway. "Why Super Bowl ads" is the top suggestion. There really isn't an answer to that, just hits about Super Bowl ads. I guess the answer is because more people watch the Super Bowl than anything else every year, so companies are likely to advertise on that day, and so they go all out. Therefore, people watch for the commercials.

"Who?"

"Who Super Bowl" mostly pertains to musicians actually. "Who Superbowl Drummer" is a top suggestion and leads to The Who drummer Zac Starkey performing in 2010. This year, Beyonce (and likely surprise guests) will perform the halftime show, while Alicia Keys will sing the national anthem. And of course, Beyonce already crapped all over that by performing the national anthem at her Super Bowl press conference.

Last year, Madonna performed at halftime in front of 114 million viewers, 3 million more viewers than those that actually watched the game itself. I'm hopeful that 50 million people were in the bathroom or having a cigarette at halftime.

"How?"

"How the Super Bowl works" is actually an article on the awesome site, How Stuff Works. Just in case you were like "How'd they get that darn fangled game to work??" It's actually quite simple and not much different than how other football games work. The only difference is that halftime is about 18 minutes longer and more people watch than a regular game.

"How did the Super Bowl get its name?" Now there is a good question!

Lamar Hunt, "architect of the AFL", coined the term when the first post AFL-NFL merger championship game was played between the Packers and Chiefs in 1967. Hunt made a joke that they should call it the "Super Bowl" after a toy his daughter had... a Super BALL! So there you go, the most important sporting event in America is a bad pun.

That sounds about right.

Now, are there any questions?

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