President Obama would not let his son play football, should be arrested for treason

Mark Wilson

Add Obama to the list turning Americas sport into powderpuff.

We're required to remind you that these strong takes are PARODY. Sorry, not sorry. All spelling errors are intentional, we think. -Ed.

In the January 27th issue of the New Yorker, our "President" Barack Hussain Obama sits down for a exclusive interview with a friendly writer with a liberal education. As things tend to do with our "President," Obama steared the conversation towards which cool fun activities like eating Hardees or comitting hate crimes should be made illeagal next. Well they caught the President watching football aka "America's Game" and buried deep in a column about fore-end policiy and death panels is this little nugget:

Reports of multiple concussions and retired players with early-onset dementia had been in the news all year, and so, before I left, I asked if he didn’t feel at all ambivalent about following the sport. He didn’t.

"I would not let my son play pro football," he conceded.

Color me shocked that a guy whose got robot warriors firing missles on people isnt concerned about a couple guys getting there brains nicked.

And wow "Mr" "President", I guess you dont even remember the sex of your own daughters, not even the hot one. Number one Mr. "President" you dont HAVE a son because your sperm werent operating at padlevel in the slot at "Y" they were to busy showing off at "X" running down the outside.

Second've all, I dont think that any son of yours would be any good at NFL. If hes anything like his old man he'll just spend all've his youth just trying to get a sack, run his mouth, then drop the ball. Funny how your wives (oh my god those arms at least ONE person in your house believes in the 2nd amenment) at least Michelle's honest with her athleticism, starting the "Let's Move" program is quiet appropriate since thats the first thing that everyone says when they hear about it folks.


Very disingenuous — has a fake smile, comes off as very scripted and has a selfish, me-first makeup.  Always knows where the cameras are and plays to them.  Has an enormous ego with a sense of entitlement that continually invites trouble and makes him believe he is above the law — does not command respect.

I will give Obama a pass on alots of things: the Iraq War, all three bailouts, starting a illeagal wiretap systems, forcing Gay people to get married when Im single, but this goes to far. We're not even allowed to not have health insurance anymore, now we wont be able to watch football games.

Welcome to Obamas America in 2050, Duck Dynastys cancelled, the only professional sports are virtual reality pattycake, basketball, and Madden,, Footballs illeagal and so is owning a cool pawn shop. No one packs a lunchpail anymore because were all on government lunch programs that only serve arugla and quinoa folks.

Heres a little quote from the Constitution of the United States:

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

Written by Thomas Jefferson- a REPUBLICAN. Wasnt racist, some of his kids were black, actually.

Talking about not letting kids play football technically qualifys as hate speech against MY America, its taking away MY pursuit of happiness, in which case I am well within my rights to arrest you for Treason against my country. First they came for my chicken sandwiches and I said nothing then they came for Phil Robertson and I said nothing, now they come for my NFL and all my Duck Dynasty/Obama memes are old hat.

This is going to backfire on you Ograndma,, because if NFL doesnt mean National Football League its just going to be for Never Forget Lybia (bengazi) in MY opinion. And I'd say that youve just given all the ammunition that Jeb Bush will need since dumbocraps are aparently running on a "No NFL" platform which should be as popular as a freezerbag full of cat tumors. Your just going to learn it the hardway by putting your foot in your mouth instead when you should of put it in the ground and got downhill.

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