The NFL Draft is an ever-changing landscape of wonderment, tiny hands, and booing Jets fans. It's a near-perfect event, except for one problem -- only New York City has the chance to enjoy it first-hand. Thankfully, the NFL is looking to change all that!
NFL source tells me the draft plan they're looking at most closely right now is the first 1-2 nights in NYC, then 3-4 in another city.— Bart Hubbuch (@HubbuchNYP) May 7, 2014
Now any place can enjoy late-round picks and Mr. Irrelevant. Here are 10 locations that would really benefit from a little NFL action:
- Whichever city raises the most tax money gets to hold the Draft in its new, 70,000-seat stadium.
- Harrah's Cherokee Casino, North Carolina, at the request of Dan Snyder.
- At Gathering of the Juggalos, wherever that winds up.
- On a public Minecraft server.
- From the National Mall. Goodell announces the picks from the steps of the Lincoln Memorial, which has been draped with a promotional jersey so it looks like Abe is wearing it. Players emerge from port-a-johns lined up along the lawn.
- Roger Goodell announces the picks while hosting "Saturday Night Live." Every draft pick will be played by Kenan Thompson.
- One pick will be announced per day during the offseason via the NFL Network. In May the lightning rounds begin.
- Trump Tower, midtown Manhattan. Trump insists it start at 5 a.m. and go quickly, because he has to call into a radio show at 6.
- The University of Alabama on the day after National Signing Day.
- On the NFL's flying aircraft carrier. Wait, you're not supposed to know about that.
David Roth, Ryan Van Bibber, Jason Kirk, Matt Ufford and Bill Hanstock contributed to this list.