SB Nation - T.J. Houshmandzadeh

In Defense of Señor Ochocinco

ericj69 — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 21:55:11 -0000

Love him or hate him, he's already made Sunday's game a lot more interesting.

He Riverdanced in the endzone. He putted the football with a pylon. He gave the football CPR. He declared himself a future Hall of Famer. He sent "gifts" to opposing defensive backs on game weeks. He made a list of "who covered him" in 2005. He raced a freaking horse. He got fined for asking not to be fined. He proposed to a Bengals cheerleader. He jumped into the Dawg Pound and did a Lambeau Leap. Just last week, he donned a sombrero and poncho. This week, he's threatening to blow the Vikings horn if he scores. (As Gonzo already pointed out, that's gonna be pretty tough considering we play that through the speakers.)

He legally changed his last name from Johnson to the Spanish pronunciation of the digits of his jersey number. He may change his last name again to the Japanese pronunciation of the digits of his jersey number. No, I'm not kidding. You may be choosing Chad Hachi Go in your fantasy drafts next year.

He violates the NFL uniform policy more often than Tiger Woods violates his marriage vows. He Tweets roughly 647 times a day. He made up two totally nonsensical phrases, "Child please" and "Kiss da baby", while stealing the show on HBO's "Hard Knocks" this season. (Not to mention his new line of condoms.) He...well that's all I can think of right now, but I'm sure I'm missing at least a handful of other crazy things he's done.

And you know what? Even though I'm not a Bengals fan, I love every last bit of it.

If you're a regular reader of the Daily Norseman, you know that I often have fun at the expense of opposing players. Just take a look at my recent posts about T.J. Houshmandzadeh and Jay Cutler. But when it comes to Chad Ochocinco, I can't help but like the guy.

Most people outside of southwestern Ohio can't stand him, and I understand why. Chad is a cocky, showboating loudmouth who's starved for attention and wants the spotlight permanently affixed on him. When he scores, I'm guessing the phrase "act like you've been there before" has never crossed his mind. Each premeditated celebration makes Vince Lombardi and Knute Rockne spin in their graves. Basically, he's the polar opposite of "old school".

Which, in my opinion, makes him so likable. My formative years of NFL fandom included the Ickey Shuffle, the Redskins "Fun Bunch", the Super Bowl Shuffle, and Billy White Shoes Johnson. I fell in love with the NFL because it looked like so much fun. These days, I'm all too aware that the NFL is big business before everything else. But Chad's antics, as sophomoric and cheesy as they are, remind us that the game can still be fun.

So there, I said it. I defended #85. I truly enjoy him. Deal with it. But that doesn't mean I'll enjoy anything he does on Sunday.

Barring a collapse rivaling that of Tiger Woods' public image (that's right, two Tiger jokes--gotta strike while the iron's hot), the Cincinnati Bengals are going to win the AFC North. The Steelers conveniently took themselves out of contention last night, and Cincy needs only one more win or Ravens loss to clinch. And you know what? They've earned it. They've earned it by grinding the clock with a punishing rushing attack, not making many mistakes, using opportunistic special teams, and leaning on a vastly improved defense. So basically, they've been very anti-Bengal-like this year. Which is always a good thing.

What isn't good for the Bengals is how they match up with the Vikings. So you want to run the football 35 times? Don't think the Vikings' #3 rush defense will have a problem with that. Plus Antoine Winfield should finally be back in the lineup this week. (Of course we've heard that before from "The Foot That Cried Wolf".) Although I just got done heaping praise on Ochocinco, it isn't like Cincinnati's offense has been that explosive in 2009. Gonzo covered this yesterday by pointing out that they haven't lit up the scoreboard since blowing out the Bears in Week 7.

Yet the Bengals are still winning because of their defense. Defensive coordinator Mike Zimmer has his group of NFL castoffs playing downright amazing. If he doesn't get a head coaching gig with all the vacancies sure to be created after the season, I'd be shocked. Favre & Co. will have to perform much better than they did in Arizona to move the ball.

I think it's going to be a battle on Sunday. But if you think the Bengals are going to come to the Metrodome and beat the Vikes this week, I only have one thing to say to you.

Child please.

Prediction: Vikings 24, Bengals 19

My Week 14 NFL picks, guaranteed to be mediocre as ever:

Saints over FALCONS: The Saints have officially entered the Madden Zone. Not only do they put up Arena League points, they had the classic "No F---ing Way" game against Washington last week. Everyone that has played Madden knows that game. It's when no matter what you do, the computer steals the game from you. Even if it looks like your guy was down, the game still rules it a fumble. Even though you swear your accuracy was right on, your kicker pushes the game-icing field goal wide right, leaving you saying "No f---ing way" about fifteen times. Sound familiar Redskins fans? Anyway, stick a fork in Atlanta. The injury bug ate whatever chance they had of being contenders in '09.

Jets over BUCCANEERS: I don't care that the Sanchize is out because he's allergic to sliding. The Bucs are 31st in the NFL in run defense. Rex Ryan should be pistol whipped for every Kellen Clemens pass play he calls past 20 attempts.

PATRIOTS over Panthers: A rematch of Super Bowl XXXVIII! But this time around, the "XXX" stands for how New England's second half offense is about as good as the movie "XXX" starring Vin Diesel (that's not a good thing); the "V" stands for how Carolina's fan base is "Very depressed" about their quarterback situation; and the "III" stands for tally marks for each play that Randy Moss will actually try during this game. Or is it tally marks for the amount of baby mama's that Tom Brady will have by the end of his career? I can't decide. If I were Tom, I'd go after Victoria's Secret model Miranda Kerr to be Baby Mama #3, because I chose her for my gratuitous picture of the week.

Bills over CHIEFS: Judging by how the past few weeks have gone in the NFL, this will somehow end up being the best game of the week. I just can't figure out how that could possibly happen though.

RAVENS over Lions: Too bad this game is the same week as our game against the Bengals. Because if the Lions win this game, it's obvious that the AFC North is incapable of beating terrible teams. Then if our Cincy game was later in the season, the Vikings could just wear 2008 Lions jerseys and cruise to victory!

Packers over BEARS: The biannual game where I hope both teams lose and suffer many season-ending injuries. Alas, my dream never comes true. I'd like the Bears to show up and help us clinch the division, but that's kind of like asking Tiger Woods to win a Husband of the Year Award. (BOOM! Just when you thought it was safe! A TIGER WOODS JOKE TRIFECTA!)

TEXANS over Seahawks: The Poulan Weed Eater Independence Bowl matchup of the week. Sure, they're still playing, but both sets of fans know that this game doesn't mean anything.

COLTS over Broncos: I'd love to kidnap Colts head coach Jim Caldwell fifteen minutes before kickoff and see if anyone on Indy's sideline notices before halftime. I say no. What a great gig that guy has.

Dolphins over JAGUARS: I absolutely HATE picking games that involve either of these teams. The Fins and Jags can beat anyone and lose to anyone on any given week. I'm just glad they're playing each other this week so it only counts for one incorrect pick.

RAIDERS over Redskins: Washington better watch out here. If they're not careful, they're going to mess up their formula of getting a big lead on a team only to choke it away late. If the Skins get up by more than a score on Oakland, I'm fairly doubtful that the Raiders will allow choking like that on their watch.

TITANS over Rams: A Super Bowl XXXIV rematch! Except one team started their season six weeks late and the other team should have just quit after beating the Lions. This is also my Eliminator pick of the week--still kickin' at 13-0!

COWBOYS over Chargers: San Diego has won 15 December games in a row. The Cowboys have stunk in December since the old Levi's Button Your Fly shirts were in. Picking the Chargers is too obvious here, right? (Says the guy that limped to 9-7 in his picks last week.)

GIANTS over Eagles: The Eagles could easily win this game. But I'm rooting for Andy Reid to pull one of his classic clock management botch jobs to allow the Giants to win in the waning seconds, followed by Eagles fans realizing in horror that they just signed this guy for three more years. Because after dealing with Philly fans in the Dome the past two seasons, I wish nothing but terrible things to happen to them at all times.

Cardinals over 49ERS: Yep, I'm officially terrified of facing the Cardinals again in the playoffs. That was a Grade A whoopin' they put on us last Sunday. Drew Margary already wrote about this in his weekly Deadspin Jamboroo, but it's worth mentioning again because I noticed it as well on Sunday night: Anquan Boldin is just pissed off at the entire world. He's still upset about his contract situation, and he will let you know it with each joyless reception and subsequent icy glare to anyone that dares to glance at him. Ochocinco has approximately 4,500 times more fun playing football than Boldin does every Sunday.

Last week: 9-7

Season so far: 132-61 (including picking Thursday night's game wrong)

Shallow Thoughts & Nearsighted Observations

Ted Bartlett — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 13:30:13 -0000

More photos » by Reed Hoffmann - AP

5 days ago: Kansas City Chiefs quarterback Brodie Croyle (12) has a pass attempt blocked by Denver Broncos tight end Richard Quinn (81) during a fake punt attempt at the start of the second half of their game, giving the Broncos the ball deep in Chiefs territory in their NFL football game in Kansas City, Mo., Sunday, Dec. 6, 2009. (AP Photo/Reed Hoffmann)

Browse more photos »

Happy Tuesday, friends, and welcome to another edition of ST&NO. After being sick last week, and running an abbreviated version on Wednesday, I am back in full effect this week. I feel kind of like Stringer Bell in season 2 of The Wire, when Avon Barksdale was locked up, and their supplier cut them off. Stringer said he needed to put out a smoker to hold the towers, and I feel like a smoker is similarly needed this week with ST&NO. After all, I can't really do what Stringer actually did, when he couldn't get his raw dope, and change the name. Nobody is going to read a column called Death Grip, you know? (Really, I don't know what kind of drug addict would buy dope called Death Grip, but that's neither here nor there.) Anyway, here comes the high test stuff, with the same name as always. So fill up your coffee, get comfortable, and let's get right to it. Ready.... BEGIN!!!

1. You have to like how the Broncos looked Sunday, even in spite of 3 turnovers by Kyle Orton. They once again beat down a bad team, which is what good teams have to do. They shot a hole in the terribly inane thinking that they couldn't win in Kansas City in December, and they strengthened their hold on the 5th seed in the playoffs. Helping matters, the Steelers and Ravens both lost to fall to 6-6, so their two competitors who beat them head-to-head lost some ground. I fully expect Jacksonville to choke, and I am starting to think that Miami is going to sneak into the 6th spot, actually.

In any case, the Broncos are in a pretty good place right now. Peter King declared them to be toast two weeks ago, done, kaput. On Monday, he called them a psycho team, and ranked them 10th in the Fool 15. I am still feeling good about this Indianapolis game, and I am sure that the Broncos match up pretty well with the Colts. Coverage is the only way to beat them, and the Broncos are back to covering as well as anybody. I fully expect the Broncos to run for 150 yards against the Colts too, if they can keep the score within striking distance.

It's a good Tuesday to be a Broncos fan. Our team is in in the midst of a season which we can only consider to be a success up until this point. They've come together as a team, learned how to win close games against good teams, learned how to blow out bad teams, and figured out their brand new schemes. They've seemingly bought into one of the main Patriots mantras, that Durability is more important than Ability. Everybody is working hard to Do Their Job. This is when it's good to be a fan of a team, and when it's good to be a fan of a team, it's great to be alive.

2. Information From My Eyes - Denver at Kansas City

a. Kyle Orton had a C+ game, but I felt like all three turnovers he committed were a result of him being somewhat greedy. He's supposed to be the guy who checks it down when nothing is there, isn't he? I hope that film provides a good reminder for him to do so.

b. Knowshon Moreno improves every week, and he's really looking decisive lately. You can tell that he has had a big dose of Bobby Turner's foot in his backside this year. For a pick I didn't love when it was made, I have really come to be happy with Knowshon.

c. I was pretty worried during Kansas City's 20 play first quarter drive, because the tackling and gap discipline looked pretty bad. The Broncos sure stiffened by the goal line, though, and they set the tone for the rest of the game's defensive performance.

d. I meant to talk about setting the edge last week, but I forgot to. My brother Chris felt that Matt Millen made too much of the concept during the Broncos-Giants game, but I disagree, because it's all-important to the way the Broncos run the ball, and the way they defend against the run. The Broncos have been fanstastic in their own running game with setting the edge the past two games, led by Daniel Graham. He is getting out and winning his battles outside, and giving the runners a sealed edge to run inside of. Many of Correll Buckhalter's big runs on Sunday came just inside of Graham.

On defense, the idea is the same, but the defender wants to push the edge man back into the inside, and close off the outside lane. Mario Haggan has been doing this as well as any LB in the NFL this season. He has really found his niche as a physical, upfield run player. Ryan McBean makes a lot of plays in this way, as well.

Winning the physical battles at the edge is the key to everything for the Broncos, and they lost those battles during the losing streak. Since they've gotten back to winning, it's been no accident that they're winning at the edge on both sides of the ball.

e. The kick return where Eddie Royal faked a reverse to Brandon Marshall was interesting. I expect to see them actually hand that off one of these weeks.

f. Alphonso Smith needs to knock off the sucker penalties.

g. Spencer Larsen is an appreciably better blocker than Peyton Hillis. He just thumps guys, and it goes well with the work that Graham and Richard Quinn are doing at TE.

h. Tony Scheffler had a huge 3^rd down drop in 2^nd Quarter, and it was exactly the kind of play that has prevented the Broncos from being an elite offense. You have to make plays when they are available to be made. At least Scheffler blasted the return man on the ensuing punt.

i. Tamba Hali is a good fit for the 3-4, as I have been saying since the preseason. He's aggressive, quick, strong, and as a lifelong down DE, he has very good technique. The first sack he got on Ryan Clady was all technique. The Broncos did take advantage of Hali's aggressiveness on both TD passes, though, and also on the 49 yard bubble screen that Brandon Marshall had.

j. I saw where somebody said we should thank Phildelphia for Brian Dawkins and Correll Buckhalter. Miami is due a thank you card for Andre Goodman and Renaldo Hill, as well. If Goodman were just a little better tackler, I'd be even happier, but everybody should have noticed by now that the ball just seems to find its way into his hands.

k. Matt Prater has developed into one of the best kickers in the NFL. It's time we all realize that, and appreciate his work.

l. My biggest problem with Mitch Berger is that he takes too long to get the ball off. He had yet another seeing-eye punt on Sunday, which inexplicably missed a dead-to-rights block. Upgrading the punter position has to be a huge priority in the offseason.

m. It was great to see Peyton Hillis running the ball again, and he reminded the world that he can do some damage with it. Hopefully, the performance will get him some snaps on offense, because he clearly has something to contribute.

n. I really like Darcel McBath as a matchup safety. He is always around the ball when he is on the field, and I think his pick was a triumph of player evaluation. Draftniks considered him a reach, but he was hard to spot on some abysmal Texas Tech defensive units. He clearly has the goods, though; it jumps off the screen at you.

3. Information From My Eyes - Other games

a. I watched most of the San Francisco-Seattle game, and you know that means I will have some Alex Smith thoughts. He played great on Sunday, and did everything the team needed from him to win, short of missing one open receiver on a deep out in the 4^th quarter. It was the first 300 yard passing game of his career, and it should have been a lot more. His teammates dropped at least 9 passes in the game, including 3 TDs, by Delanie Walker, Vernon Davis, and Michael Crabtree.

b. Speaking of Smith, I meant to clear up an uttlerly stupid comment made by the always-brilliant Solomon Wilcots during last week's game. The head cold I was feeling made me forget to mention it, I guess. Wilcots noticed that the 49ers were (smartly) using Smith in the shotgun very frequently, and he said (I'm paraphrasing) that Smith was very comfortable, because he had used the exact same offense throughout college.

That's very interesting, Saruman, except, he didn't. This gets to my constant annoyance about the term "Spread Offense." There is no one monolithic spread offense. There are college teams which do some similar things formationally, with a lot of WRs, and many plays with the QB taking snaps from the shotgun, but the actual plays vary greatly. The 49ers aren't doing anything that is much like the Urban Meyer offense he played in at Utah. There are no option plays, and no shovel passes. The pass routes are actually tending to be much more horizontal and timed than the stuff he did in college.

A bunch of WRs and a shotgun setup does not mean you're playing a "spread offense," and saying that you're playing a "spread offense" doesn't mean the same thing from one place to the next. Smith is most comfortable in his footwork and reads from the shotgun, and he has time to get the ball out before he gets crushed behind the Niners terrible O-line. Smith has been sacked only once in the last 2 games. My only concern is that they've abandoned the run too much, and need to stick to it much more.

c. I remember thinking that Seattle looked pretty good against the Broncos in the preseason, but as I watched the game today, I was thinking that I really don't like the way their team is constructed. They have 3 terribly overpaid guys at WR (Deion Branch, T.J. Houshmandzadeh, and Nate Burleson), and not much talent at RB or on the offensive line. The only players I really like at all on their defense are Brandon Mebane and Aaron Curry. They have a lot of money invested in Lofa Tatupu and Leroy Hill at LB, but I think both guys are just solid players (Tatupu is currently hurt, obviously.) I think they ought to go to a 3-4, if they can get a good NT in the offseason. (A few should be available.) The guy they have, Colin Cole, is more of a backup caliber guy. They could stand up Patrick Kerney, and use Curry in a blitzing role, which he is best suited for. Of course, their secondary will still be lousy, unless they address it.

d. Chad Henne looked really good on Sunday. I had the Miami-New England game on the smaller TV, during the Broncos game, and just about every time I looked over, he was making a play for his team. If he keeps it up, he'll be able to easily afford tattoo removal before too long.

e. ST&NO favorite Sean Smith had an interesting game on Sunday. He gave up an 81 yard TD to Sam Aiken on a play where he had perfect bump and run coverage but didn't find the ball in the air, and fell down trying. Later, he got beaten by Aiken on a double move, and Tom Brady overthrew him by about a foot. He got beat on a perfectly covered play, and got lucky on a busted coverage play. Such is the nature of being a CB playing a lot of man-to-man. By the way, Smith continues to look like he'll have a long career as one of the best man coverage players in the NFL.

f. I really liked what the Giants did on defense Sunday against Dallas, and I picked them based upon some moves I heard about during the week. For one thing, they moved a good CB, Aaron Ross, to FS, and benched the abysmal C.C. Brown. For another, they took a big-name guy, Osi Umenyiora, out of the starting lineup, and replaced him with Mathias Kiwanuka. Osi struggles against the run, and the Broncos continually ran at him on Thanksgiving night. The Giants correctly identified their top priority as containing the Dallas running game, and made the move to the stouter Kiwanuka.

The effect was that both guys played really well. Umenyiora was actually used quite a bit in coverage, and he did pretty well. He's really a lean, athletic guy, and he did well in that role. He also recovered a key fumble, and returned it for a bunch of yards. The Giants held the Cowboys to 45 yards rushing on 23 carries, and it's the primary reason they won the game.

g. Don't give too much credence to this "Tony Romo/Wade Phillips can't win in December" stuff. Romo, particularly, played pretty well Sunday, and the loss wasn't on him. It was on a few defensive breakdowns which led to big plays, and the aforementioned lack of an effective running game.

Remember the one about correlation not necessarily reflecting causality? There is a real danger to putting too much stock in facts which Peter King insists on incorrectly referring to as factoids. The December record for the Cowboys the past few years is a case in point. It doesn't necessarily foretell what will happen this year, and even if the Cowboys lose a bunch of games this month, it may have nothing to do with the month. Remember, a football game is an independent event, which is comprised of many individual independent events. What happened in the past is meaningless.

h. Another example of this foolishness with meaningless statistics, while we're at it, was any credence being put into the fact that the Broncos were 1-16 all-time in Kansas City, during the month of December. Where to begin with this?

Well, in the most obvious place, of considering the significance of recency. If no players or coaches (or even owners) remain from the time when a game was played, that game has no meaning. A game in 1972 was played between the Chiefs and the Broncos, but not THESE Chiefs and Broncos. A rational person realizes that that game may as well have been between any two teams.

Another idea I had about this, that I wanted to share, harkens back to my days as a Finance major at THE Cleveland State University. There was a required class, Financial Markets and Institutions, which was really a BS class. It was taught by a really overweight, smelly, tenured professor who breathed really heavily, and the dude didn't ever teach anything, ever.

The class met in a computer lab, and consisted of 4 group analysis projects. We were given a bunch of parameters of a hypothetical economic environment, and we had to choose the 3-year period of the last 30 years, which was most predictive of the behavior of whatever financial instrument we were analyzing. We then used data from that 3 year period to analyze and project the performance of that instrument, and built a 6 slide PowerPoint discussing quantitative and qualitative reasons for our analysis. That was a 4 credit class.

Anyway, I was thinking that a reasonable thing to do might be to look into whether there was ever a time in semi-recent history where the two teams profiled like these two do, AND they played a game at Arrowhead in December. I didn't find any instances where the Broncos were a playoff caliber team, the Chiefs were a complete doormat, and the schedule played out this way. You could say I was not surprised at all by Sunday's result.

i. Chris Johnson is very dangerous, but I am not one of these people who is jumping up to call him the best RB in the NFL. For one thing, I think he makes the Titans a finesse running team. They do a ton of zone blocking for him, and he runs to the edges all the time, but without the kind of one-cut decisiveness that Broncos runners have always been coached into employing. Really, Johnson is a bit over-patient, in my opinion, and it's his exceptional burst and speed that let him mostly get away with it. I also continue to have my doubts about Johnson's ability to handle the heavy workload he gets, over a number of years. The Titans would be smart to get a legitimate second guy to take one third of the carries, because they apparently don't think LenDale White is that guy.

j. The Titans blew one on Sunday, and the way they did makes me feel even better about the Broncos' prospects for winning in Indianapolis next week. At halftime, the Titans had 2 more yards, and 6 more minutes of time of possession than the Colts, and Indianapolis led 24-10. The Titans also had 2 turnovers. Nate Washington dropped a perfect deep ball. There were plays available to be made, and the Titans failed to make them.

k. I watched the Steelers debacle against the Raiders, and all I can pin their problems on is missing Troy Polamalu. I think their defensive play-calling is less aggressive without Polamalu, and they're letting QBs have more time to throw the ball than the Steelers are known for doing. Bruce Gradkowski had some real good chances to get the ball downfield at times. It just gets back to the concept of a defense needing all its parts to be effective.

l. This stuff about Gradkowski being the answer for the Raiders is silly. He's a solid backup, and a try-hard guy, but he's not a starter for a winning football team. He lacks accuracy and arm strength, isn't particularly mobile, and just looks kind of underwhelming when you watch him.

m. Everybody knows I am generally not the biggest D.J. Williams lover, and I am going to reveal a closely held secret today, since I wanted to make this a smoker. My main problem with D.J. always has been that he isn't Steven Jackson. Back in 2004, I was fired up for the Broncos to draft Jackson, and a lot of Mel Kipers thought they would. They had just traded Clinton Portis, and I wanted a new RB.

When the Broncos took D.J., I was mad, my brother Chris will tell you. No matter what he ever does, I may not get over it. Anyway, I believe that Jackson is having the best season of any RB in the NFL this season, if you consider his circumstances. He has no QB, no line, not much at WR, and he continues to produce at a very high level. He's still only 26 years old, and he continues to be a great player.

n. Cedric Benson was back to his workhorse ways this week, and Larry Johnson was back to sitting on the bench. I continue to be impressed with the run blocking of Bengals LT Andrew Whitworth. He was a star at LSU, and was believed to be more of a guard, which is why he went in the second round. He has been blowing guys off the ball, though, as a LT. He's been similar to Jake Long, but better this season.

o. Matthew Stafford is clearly a tremendously tough kid, because he's been getting killed every week for the Lions, and he keeps coming back. He has a ways to go from a decision-making perspective, but he has to have the respect of his teammates, and you can't minimize the importance of that to a QB.

p. A lot has been made of the Michael Vick sighting in Atlanta, but the truth of the story is that he played a lot of garbage snaps in a blowout. The best thing you can say about him is that he showed he still has good run skills, and decent throwing skills. He completed both of his throws, but the long ball was kind of a duck thrown into a crowd, where Reggie Brown made a play on the ball. I do think he's going to get a look in a place like Carolina, which has no prospect of drafting a QB early.

q. Some pundit in the ESPN-o-sphere was recently trying to hypopulate that the Falcons were better off with Chris Redman at QB than Matt Ryan. As much of a non-fan of Ryan as I am, that's stupid. There's a good reason Redman was out of the league for more than 3 years, and that it took nepotism from his college coach, Bobby Petrino, to bring him back. He's been solid in some of his appearances, but there's no team in the NFL right now, for whom he is an upgrade over their starter.

r. If you remember back to the 2008 Draft, no WR was selected in the first round, and the first one chosen was Donnie Avery by the Rams. All the draftniks called Devin Thomas the best prospect, and had him going in the first round, and he eventually went one pick after Avery, 34^th.

He's playing fantastic football lately, and his rise really kind of started in the Denver game. Thomas is showing the qualities of a number 1 WR, and whoever his coach is next year, he is really going to benefit from it. Having a big, physical outside player like Thomas opens up the field for a guy like Santana Moss. Washington's recent offensive improvement has a lot to do with the light bulb going on for Thomas.

s. Percy Harvin didn't actually play RB at the University of Florida, and as a UF alum, Cris Collinsworth should know that. Collinsworth was trying to say that Harvin never ran any routes in college, and that couldn't be further from the truth. He didn't exactly run a full tree, but he ran many crossing routes, slants, and go routes. He has incredible run skills for an outside player, but he's a natural WR, make no mistake about it.

t. I hadn't gotten a look at Kurt Warner's wife in awhile, and she seems to have really upgraded her hair-sylist over the years. Back when Kurt won a Super Bowl, she looked like the kind of mom I would see wearing mom jeans, dragging around a bunch of kids at Wal-Mart, if I shopped at Wal-Mart. It's okay to wear mom jeans and shop at Wal-Mart, lest I offend anybody who does, but it's different for the MVP's wife.

u. Do these Gap ads with dancing beautiful people doing cheerleader cadences and wearing plaid make anybody want to go buy plaid clothing? I am interested in marketing and advertising, so if you're a ST&NO reader who finds those ads effective, I'd appreciate you saying so in the comments. My hypothesis is that they don't work well for anybody who reads this column.

v. My other holiday season advertising analysis is as follows: I think the Best Buy caroling store clerks suck, but at least people who watch football tend to buy stuff at Best Buy. I bet they're trying to snag a wife or two with those ads. The Open Hearts collection at Kay Jewelers is of very little interest to the average male football fan, who tends not to care about Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman's mommy's trite advice. Kay ought to stick to their ads which say, "Your wife will give you some incremental action for a couple weeks, if you buy her a diamond. The bigger th diamond, the more action." It communicates the needed psychological message to men better. I do like the Go Forth Levi's ads, and I think they're very effective, vis-à-vis the football watching audience whom they're aired for.

w. The Cardinals are for real, again, and the main reason they are is that they have legitimate stars at every level of their defense. Darnell Dockett has been a star, and Calais Campbell is turning into one at DE. Karlos Dansby is terrific at LB, and Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie and Adrian Wilson are both big-time players too. The underrated guy who I like is Antrel Rolle. He was kind of a bust as a first round CB, but he's terrific as a matchup safety. He's very smart, and can match up man-to-man with inside WRs or TEs. He also has excellent ball skills. The Cardinals could beat any team in the NFL on a day where both their offense and defense are clicking, because their personnel is definitely good enough on both sides of the ball.

x. Watching the Packers version of the 3-4 Monday night, I was struck by the difference between what they're doing, and what the Broncos do. Denver's scheme is much more similar to what the Cardinals, Ravens, and Jets are doing, where the pass rush is fairly conservative, and setting the edge and keeping contain responsibilities is often the main concern. If you watch what the outside rushers do for the Broncos a lot of times, they're not coming full-steam at the QB. Elvis Dumervil, Robert Ayers, and Darrell Reid are often asked to do more wrestling with O-Linemen than they are asked to run around people.

The Packers play more like the Steelers, where they're speed rushing off the edge. The point I am getting to is that Clay Matthews is a great fit for what the Packers are asking him to do, where Ayers is more of a fit for the Broncos scheme, despite his lack of sacks. Ayers has just missed a lot of sacks, and with better technique, he'll get there. He's doing a lot more than running around people, though.

y. Jermichael Finley is enormously talented, and is really starting to come into his own for the Packers. You can see that Aaron Rodgers is really developing a lot of trust in him.

z. The Packers are really protecting Rodgers a lot better than they were in the early part of the season. I've been very critical of Chad Clifton and Mark Tauscher both over the past two years, but they've been an upgrade over the bums they replaced. Tauscher even caught his first NFL pass on Monday night, off a deflection.

aa. Rodgers is really starting to remind me of Rich Gannon in his Raiders years. He's so calm, and he goes to the right place with the ball all the time, with accuracy. He's playing as well as any QB in the NFL this season if you consider what he is doing independently.

ab. Lardarius Webb is so dangerous returning kickoffs. The Ravens, again, found a gem in the Draft

ac. Everybody knows I am a Joe Flacco fan, but he needs to remember never to throw the ball late down the middle. The officials tried to give the Ravens the game with all those late pass interference penalties and Flacco blew the game with his late interceptions.

4. Most regulars know that I am a Florida Gators fan, so I was pretty disappointed in the result of the SEC Championship game. Alabama deserved to win, because they made every play that was available for them to make. Florida made plays with very few of their opportunities, and that's what happens.

Anyway, nobody can deny that that game was a bonanza of future NFL players. I wanted to share some thoughts on about 10 guys who I think could go in the first 2 rounds in April, from the two schools.

a. Carlos Dunlap DE Florida Top 5

Mel Kiper downgraded Dunlap to 14^th on his Big Board after his DUI, but that's not going to mean anything when he compares favorably to Mario Williams in testing and measurements. His college film is better too, and he can play in any type of front. He and Ndamukong Suh will be the first two defensive players drafted.

b. Joe Haden CB Florida Top 10

Haden is by far the best CB in the nation. His play was a lonely bright spot for Florida, as he shut down the extremely talented Julio Jones. Haden is fast, fluid, smart, strong, and he has excellent ball skills. He compares as a prospect to Darrelle Revis.

c. Terrence Cody NT Alabama Top 20

He's not fat anymore, and he's covering a lot more space laterally than he did a year ago. His athleticism really flashes for such a huge man, and his strength is terrific. He punked Florida into not even trying to run their dive series. I'm a big fan of this guy.

d. Brandon Spikes ILB Florida Top 20

Spikes is not an elite athlete, but he's an elite player. He's downhill all the time in the running game, and he strikes guys as hard as any college player you'll ever see. He's also as naturally gifted and instinctive in pass coverage as Ray Lewis, and he's a similar type of emotional leader. What intrigues me most at the NFL level with Spikes is his natural pass-rushing skills. He really can get after a QB. He'll only run a 4.65 or 4.7, but he'll be an every down player, and make a bunch of Pro Bowls, trust me.

e. Rolando McClain ILB Alabama Top 20

McClain is big, fast, and smart. He's a bit less of a playmaker than Spikes, and more of a cerebral guy than an emotional one. He'll be a very good 3-4 ILB for many years in the NFL.

f. Tim Tebow QB Florida Top 25

Scouts don't like him that much, but coaches love him. Mike Shanahan, Tony Dungy, and Bill Belichick are all on record as thinking he'll be a big-time QB in the NFL. I am pretty sure the Jaguars are going to take him in the first round if he's on the board. Even Florida Governor Charlie Crist (an FSU guy, actually) was in the media Monday calling for it to happen. There is no doubt in my mind that he can play at the NFL level, despite his divergence from norms. He's the second coming of Donovan McNabb to me.

g. Aaron Hernandez TE Florida First Round

Hernandez is a junior, and he's not a huge or great in-line blocker. He's a tremendously gifted receiver though, as good as any who has been draft-eligible in many years. He is extremely dangerous after the catch, which is rare for a guy his size (6-2, 250.)

h. Javier Arenas CB Alabama Second Round

I really like Arenas as a CB, but I love him as a return man. I think he projects as a solid #2 CB, and a Pro Bowl caliber special teams player. His short, stout build works against him as a CB, but for him as a ball carrier.

i. Riley Cooper WR Florida Second Round

Who? He's the tall white guy who has been wearing #11 the past two years. (He wore #86 the first two, when he was primarily a special teamer.) He's been called the fastest Gator in a 60 yard dash, and as Gary Danielson noted on Saturday, nobody seems to be able to cover him, especially when they try to press him. Cooper had his way with Arenas several times, and he dominated Patrick Robinson from Florida State the week before. He's 6-3, 215 pounds, and very strong, which he puts to use in beating press coverage, and he's a dominant blocker outside. He projects as an outside-the-numbers deep threat type, and special teams ace, and when he runs a 4.35 at the combine, he's going to shoot up boards. The only question is if he'd rather play baseball instead (he's part of the Rangers minor league system already.) I think his future is brighter in football.

j. Jermaine Cunningham DE-OLB Florida Second Round

Cunningham projects as a starter at the NFL level, probably as an OLB in a 30 front. He plays much bigger than his size, and takes on blocks well. He kind of reminds me of Mario Haggan, actually.

k. Mike Johnson G Alabama Second Round

This is the type of guy I'd like to see the Broncos take in the second round. He is a strong and experienced drive blocker.

You can add in a few more Gators too, who seem less likely to declare at this moment, if they do. The Pouncey twins, Mike and Maurkice, project as late first or second round picks as interior offensive linemen, and S Major Wright looks like a second rounder to me.

5. I meant to mention this last week too, and I wanted to make the point. Matt Millen was a terrible general manager, but he is an outstanding in-game color analyst. There is nobody on TV who adds more value to a fan's understanding of what is going on than Millen does.

During the Broncos-Giants game, he pointed out how Kyle Orton was calling out the Mike. The average fan doesn't know what a Mike is, so Millen mentioned that it generally means Middle Linebacker. He also went on to mention that the reason Orton is calling out a Mike is to communicate to the protection that that player is the fifth player to account for. A lot of times it was a defensive back, but Orton was communicating who he thought was the most likely fifth rusher.

After the Monday night game, he was talking about how the Packers have shored up their protection, particularly against the double A-gap blitzing that Baltimore loves to do. It's a little bit hard to separate the man from his art, but you have to. He's outstanding on TV, and should be listened to.

My friend Tony from Norwich sent me this link last week, where the Sporting News rated the best sportscasters. I found it interesting, so I thought I'd share it, since it's germane to this rant. I think they have some total losers on their list, primarily Al Michaels, Verne Lundquist, Dan Fouts, and Mike Patrick. Lundquist is the worst play-by-play man ever, if you ask me.

Just prior to the start of the SEC Championship Debacle, Verne was getting down to business. Paraphrasing, he said, "I don't know what Alabama is doing, but Javier Arenas isn't on the field to return this kick." As number 28 warmed up on the TV screen, waiting for the kick to arrive. I threw my Gator hat across the room, and Tweeted:

He misidentifies players constantly, and gets a lot of rules-related topics wrong too. Gary Danielson is excellent, but Verne is a 9,000 ton anchor dragging him down.

6. I got a reader email which forced to be a little introspective last week, and I need to address something real quick, as a result of it. The reader didn't sign the message, but the crux of it was that he/she felt like I am really full of myself, and that that was "repugnant." (Repugnant was his/her actual word.)

I didn't thnk I would ever need to do this, but I am going to explain the central concept of ST&NO, so there's clarity among us all. The premise of this feature, for which I am sure I have written well over 100,000 words during the past year, is that insightful analysis can be, and should be, combined with humor, personality, and entertaining writing. Every week, that's what I try to bring to the table, and I work hard to make this a coherent, continuous, unified narrative, which everybody can feel like they're part of.

Now, I am definitely not known for false humility. What good does it do to pretend to lack self-awareness, for the comfort of insecure people? I know my work is very good, and if I didn't think it was, I think I'd be an A-clown to spend so much time on it. Everybody who does this has some ego about their work, believe me.

Believe it or not, watching 6 games on a Monday night, and then writing for 6 hours after that, after working all day, can get pretty boring and tiresome. It is work, just like what I do in my office all day. I choose to do this work because you, my readers, reaffirm that you want to read it every week. It's not worth the effort to just do it for myself.

Now, understand that I'm not going to change anything, really. Not being Joe Milquetoast is frankly a subtle part of the humor of ST&NO, and it's a true picture of who I am as a person. I'm not at all meek, and I'm not looking to inherit the Earth, or any other damn thing. I'm here to work hard and personally earn what I get. When I say I am a high-talent, high-work ethic accountant, it's because that is a demonstrable fact. You'll recall that I said it as part of a larger point about football and the media environment. I have thought all week about whether I am inappropriately arrogant, and I really think that the answer is no. I think I land in a reasonable place, really, given the givens. So, I am going to keep writing, I am going to keep doing work that I am proud of, and I am going to do it to add value for you, and for future readers who aren't even aware of ST&NO yet. I humbly thank you all for being my readers and commenters, and that was the type of humility that I do value; the genuine kind.

7. Retired for John Elway.

8. Okay, I need to end on a good note, and I am going to bed at 1 AM Cleveland time, on Tuesday morning, so I can think and dream on what that note should be. I'll be back in 5 1/2 hours to finish up, hopefully with a great idea. Ready..... STOP

Okay, I am back. Ready.... BEGIN!!! My alarm wakes me up to the local low-brow morning radio show, Rover's Morning Glory. Through my adventures with the snooze bar, I got to hear a lot of stilted Tiger Woods chatter, because apparently, his wife split, and he had some other blond woman over who left in an ambulance this morning.

He's being an idiot, from the sound of things. I don't know who is advising him; maybe T.O.'s publicist who said he had 25 million reasons to live? Tiger ought to just fess up for everything, like David Letterman. When you're in the mud, you might as well just get everything out there voluntarily, because there's no more incremental damage he could take. If you're Wee-Bey, and you're already going to prison for life for six murders, you might trade copping to a few more for a sandwich. The number ceases to matter, as long as it all comes out now.

Tiger's reputation is fried in this moment, so he might as well say, look, yes, I was out fooling around with a lot of other women. I am not even sure how many, but it was more than several. This is a flaw in my character which I am working hard to overcome. Elin and I appreciate you giving us the benefit of some privacy, as we work through a very hard time in each of our lives. (Then, you quit having women over for awhile, and even if you don't, you make sure none of them leave your house in an ambulance.)

By not deflating the story with an "it was a lot / I have a problem" blanket statement, Tiger is letting each new revelation, by each self-serving former mistress, hurt him individually. Duji, the radio chick, was saying there are 10 who have now been identified. That's really not that many, if you're just a regular guy who is serious about philandering. A very average man could do that in a couple months, pretty easily. If you're Tiger Woods, you could have 10 in about 3 days.

Remember the haters? Well, a lot of people love to hate Tiger. He's there with Roger Federer, Derek Jeter, Tom Brady, and Jeff Gordon in that way, as guys who are so talented, and so polished that relatively untalented and unpolished people are apt to hate them. (Gordon ought to have a Gillette commercial, too. I bet they figure people who like Gordon already use good shaving equipment.) It's really an ugly trait, to root for the failure of the most talented people, but a lot of people do it. Let's drag everybody down to our own level.

Tiger needs to go on Oprah or Letterman (probably Letterman is better, given the circumstances.) If he gets all the way clean, and then disappears off the public radar for a few months, this can be stopped pretty effectively. The TMZ's and their ilk will still try to keep it going, but it will fade pretty quickly when there is no new news. Letterman already isn't being actively cast as a philanderer. Tiger can come back in the spring, with a pre-packaged narrative about how these trying times have caused him to re-invest himself in his golf game, win a few tournaments (people will perceive him to have slipped, even though he was recently playing fine), and turn this into a redemption story. Americans love redemption stories, after all.

That's all I have for this week, friends. Have a great one, and as always, tell me what you think in the comments. ST&NO may be ending for now, but the discussion is just beginning.

The Future of Matt Hasselbeck is the Future of the Seattle Seahawks, Pt. 2

John Morgan — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 03:26:51 -0000

More photos » by Ted S. Warren - AP

John Carlson, Justin Forsett, Deon Butler and Max Unger form the existing core of offensive talent that Seattle can build around. Chris Spencer, Rob Sims and Sean Locklear could be retained too. If Seattle begins its move towards the offense of the future, McBow and Sparkly New Skill Position Player will join this core in 2010.

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There is no third-year wide receiver rule and no single path a quarterback takes to competence. The Seattle Seahawks could employ any strategy this offseason and still not start a competent quarterback in 2010, 2011 and 2012. If it sticks with Matt Hasselbeck, it will commit itself to Hasselbeck's decline phase, starting him in his age 35, 36 and 37 year-old seasons. For perspective, a quarterback performs at 83.2% of total capacity at 34, but historically, that capacity drops to 76.8, 69.9 and 62.9% from 35 to 37. The Seahawks could attempt to offset that decline through building a better team.

Whoever drafts Hasselbeck's replacement, whoever that replacement is, and however that replacement is integrated into the offense, the Seahawks will most likely decline as a passing offense in 2010. Old quarterbacks lose ability in chunks. Young quarterbacks gain ability in leaps. The two cross paths sometime around an old quarterback's age 36 season and a young quarterback's age 24 season.

Hasselbeck will turn 35 next season. Seattle can retain him through the end of his contract while simultaneously adding the quarterback of the future. Hasselbeck would be the presumed starter and presumably better than his young replacement, help transition Seattle towards its future, and potentially resurrect his own career, should he desire.

That's why I dub this the "Graceful Exit Plan." Seattle could draft a quarterback in the top ten, but is less likely to with Hasselbeck under contract and costing $10 million against the cap. In the last ten drafts, two quarterbacks have been selected in the top ten five times. In the last twenty drafts, two quarterbacks have been selected in the top ten ten times. It's difficult to project a draft so early in the process, but it is likely Jimmy Clausen will join Sam Bradford, Colt McCoy, Tim Tebow, Tony Pike, Dan LeFevour and Sean Canfield atop this year's quarterback class.

Clausen is the most likely top-ten pick. The impact of keeping Hasselbeck is that Seattle is unlikely to select a quarterback within the top ten, and therefore we will assume Clausen is unlikely, Bradford could likewise be unlikely, but the remaining five will be available. The remaining five represent the most likely pool of replacements for Hasselbeck.

Canfield's age is not publically listed, Rotoworld lists him at 108, but he is a senior now and graduated from high school early to attend spring drills. It's most likely that Canfield is 22, and like most of the rest of his class, will be a 23 to 24 year-old rookie.

It's ridiculous to discuss a quarterback prospect's upside. Every legitimate prospect is capable of making Canton or selling Cadillacs in five years. Likewise, the age guidelines presented by Pro Football Reference evidence that quarterback development is initially about experience. The greatest single delta is between age 21 and age 22, when a quarterback jumps 22.2%, and the second greatest is between 22 and 23, when a quarterback jumps 18.5%. Most 22 year old quarterbacks are rookies. All 21 year old quarterbacks rookies. After the sophomore sprint growth is more gradual.

The Plan Might Be Enacted Thus:

Hasselbeck is a lame duck. The media loves to pick on such situations and tease out whatever controversy possible. The ownership, management and Hasselbeck must agree to bury the subject and unite behind a common plan. That starts the day after the draft, when the team provides a unified front: Hasselbeck is the starter, but his drafted replacement, the future.

If Greg Knapp is still Seattle's offensive coordinator, Seattle's pick will most reflect his personal preferences in a quarterback. Tim Ruskell has deferred to his coaching staff, sometimes smartly, and sometimes, like when re-signing Shaun Alexander, stupidly. It will reflect Knapp's system and Ruskell's eye for talent. Let's quickly vet potential candidates.

Knapp Approved:

McCoy

Tebow

LeFevour

Canfield

Ruskell Approved:

McCoy

Tebow

Tebow could fall off Knapp's list and Canfield appear on Ruskell's. The most likely candidate is McCoy. He fits Knapp's system and passes Ruskell's standards. Tebow is the second most likely candidate and then maybe Canfield. I'll run with Tebow and McCoy, because the two are similar types and would be built around in a similar fashion.

We'll assume Seattle's spends its first overall pick on McBow. Seattle would not likely spend additional early picks on the offensive line. Knapp would protect the quarterback by moving the pocket, establishing the run and extending the short passing attack. It would want a top receiver to pair with T.J. Houshmandzadeh, replace or eventually replace Nate Burleson (2010 is voidable), grow with McBow and one day power the McSeaBow's offense. Or, should that talent be unavailable, an elite running back prospect to lead Seattle's developing committee of backs.

Knapp likes speed and Ruskell likes polish. The two might settle on Brandon LaFell. Many players are faster than Lafell, but few are more polished. Lafell does not satisfy Knapp's desire for speed, but he can be a deep threat. He's a big player, known for his blocking ability, that passes Ruskell's standards and can fit within Knapp's system.

If Seattle retains or re-signs Burleson, or postpones its need at wide receiver, it could address its defense or add a running back. The one thing it will not likely do is invest heavily into its offensive line. Another GM might.

Seattle will face a difficult free agency before it reaches the draft. Retaining Hasselbeck means a major chunk of its salary cap is invested into a player very unlikely to contribute to its future. It could cut Patrick Kerney and Walter Jones, either, but it would be hard pressed to retain all three. It must cut someone or be dragged down by sunk cost.

That period will determine who Seattle targets in the draft, but skill position and defense should populate their prime targets.

How it Works: Seattle's coaching staff and executives buy themselves a stay of execution. Emphasis is on the future and Seattle's existing offense is culled for talent. One of Chris Spencer and Rob Sims will join Deon Butler, Max Unger, Justin Forsett, John Carlson, McBow and Sparkly New Skill Position Player to form Seattle's offensive core going forward.

McBow starts for most of the preseason and subs if Hasselbeck is injured or grossly ineffective. Hasselbeck endures his victory lap with statesman-like aplomb and tutors his young understudy, to whatever undetermined effect. Seattle is not a true contender in 2010, but it could contend for the NFC West. The defense gels and Seattle's young offense shows flashes.

How it Fails: If Seattle cannot sooth Hasselbeck but feels compelled to retain him, it will struggle to keep the media hounds at bay. Management accepts 2010 as a season spent towards its future, but the media exploits the fanbase's impatience, growing dissatisfaction and entitlement, and not so subtly splits the franchise between Hasselbeck and management; The past and the future; winning and the losing it takes to win again.

McBow struggles in the preseason and is stuck behind Mike Teel or Seneca Wallace on Seattle's depth chart. The offense, built to be cheap and good, versus expensive and dominating, like the Seahawks of yore, is cheap and bad. The defense does not pick up the slack. The Seahawks spiral towards their third straight losing season, a little older, and further wedged between a full rebuild and mediocrity.

Hope You Left Room for More Turkey, because Here Comes Jay!

ericj69 — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 03:36:51 -0000

More photos » by Nam Y Huh - AP

"Gobble Gobble!"

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Ahh, Thanksgiving Weekend. Four days off of work and school. The word "tryptophan" makes its annual journey into our vocabulary for a few days. Taking midday naps with your pants unbuttoned is less frowned upon. Mild-mannered grandmothers wake up at ungodly hours and turn into bloodthirsty lunatics to get that amazing deal from the Target flier they saw in the paper.

And then there's the food. Oh eff yes, the food. Turkey. Stuffing. Corn. Turkey. Potatoes. Cranberries. Turkey. Green beans. Yams. And turkey. All covered in enough gravy to flood Lake Superior. Mmmmm.

I did two Thanksgivings on Thursday this year. I had my family's celebration over at my sister's place at noon, followed by my girlfriend's family gathering at her brother's place that evening. I had full meals at both places, which almost certainly did irreparable damage to my gastrointestinal system. But damned if I didn't have that piece of apple crisp at the end of the night just to ensure that my time spent at the gym during the month of November was all but negated.

I'm sure most of you also added some winter weight this weekend by gorging yourselves on all sorts of delicious treats. I just hope you left room for dessert tomorrow.

Because just when you thought you couldn't possibly handle any more turkey...here come Jay Cutler and the Chicago Bears!

Sure, calling someone a "turkey" is a tired theme for a column written right after Thanksgiving. It's been done a million times. But cut me some slack--it's tough to be creative when you've spent the majority of the weekend doing nothing more than laying around wondering if you just broke a one-day personal record for caloric intake. Besides, doesn't our pal Jay fit the "turkey" bill perfectly?

In case you haven't noticed, things haven't exactly gone as planned over in Chi-town this year. After being a popular preseason pick to win the NFC North, the Bears are off to a rousing 4-6 start. Cutler was supposed to be the missing link in a Chicago championship push. But as Gonzo has already pointed out, Jay Cutler is simply continuing to be Jay Cutler this season. You know how analysts love to say "this guy wins everywhere he goes" about certain players and coaches? Cutler is basically the exact opposite of that.

But I don't intend for this to be a slam piece on Cutler. I had some fun at the expense of T.J. Houshmandzadeh last week and people got all cranky with me. So before you Bears fans go buck wild in the comments section whining that it isn't all Cutler's fault, I totally agree with you. He isn't exactly surrounded by future Hall of Famers on that offense. (Well, I guess Orlando Pace is probably going to end up in the Hall, but I can guarantee you he won't be going in as a Bear.) Lovie Smith's approval rating isn't through the roof this year either. You also have to take Urlacher's absence along with injuries other key pieces of the defense into account when you look at the Bears being under .500 this year.

Having said that, the guy has still thrown 18 picks this year--tied for the lead league and 15 more than Brett Favre if you're keeping track at home. Plus he's a whiny brat that pouted his way out of Denver.

So yes, the blame for Chicago's woes doesn't fall completely on #6, but he isn't really helping his own cause either. The Bears just aren't that good this year for a vast array of reasons. For instance, they don't even have cheerleaders! Since the Bears are depriving us of sideline eye candy, I submit to you the following cheerleader eye candy to fill this horrible void Chicago has left:

Hey Chicago--you should look into getting some of these.

Unless the Bears play out of their minds and the Vikes lay a stinker for the first time in 2009, Minnesota should win this game pretty handily. Even the folks over at Windy City Gridiron aren't giving the Bears much of a chance. Although Devin Hester seems to enjoy adding to his highlight reel against the Vikings, Chicago just doesn't have the firepower to keep up with a Minnesota team that can kill you in nearly any way.

(By the way, if you see Matt Forte tomorrow, be sure to warn him that he should probably watch out for his safety. There are millions of people that want to kill him for absolutely destroying their fantasy teams.)

Prediction: Vikings 30, Bears 17

Let's take a look at the rest of the Week 12 NFL slate (home teams in CAPS):

FALCONS over Buccaneers: The Falcons are 5-1 against teams at or below .500 this season and 0-4 against teams over .500. Doesn't get much simpler than that does it?

Dolphins over BILLS: Wait, yes it does get simpler! The Bills haven't scored over 20 points since Week 2. If you don't score points, you can't win. Now THAT is simple.

TITANS over Cardinals: The Titans are on fire, and this just seems like one of those "Oh who the hell cares, we're already running away with the NFC West title, we don't have to try every week" games for the Cardinals.

RAMS over Seahawks: You saw the game at the Metrodome last week didn't you? The Seahawks are bad. I think Steven Jackson does enough to cover Kyle Boller's stench and double the Rams' win total.

EAGLES over Redskins: You know how when a long-time coach or player is about to retire, he gets quirky little gifts from teams during his Farewell Tour? Wouldn't it be awesome if they did that for Jim "Dead Man Walkin" Zorn? "Jim, since we all know this is your last time coaching in Philadelphia, here's a boxed set of the 'Rocky' DVDs." Would anyone be opposed to this? I sure wouldn't.

Panthers over JETS: I'm not picking the Jets to win a game until Mark Sanchez is cured of that nasty strain of Dellhomeitis he contracted.

BENGALS over Cleveland: The Bengals choked away a win last week in Oakland, and I guarantee you the Browns took notice. Cleveland doesn't like to have the competition in the choking department. They practically invented choking. I expect the Browns to choke harder than they've ever choked before to send notice to the rest of the league that nobody chokes like Cleveland chokes. NOBODY!

Colts over TEXANS: Shame on me for being allured by Vegas to pick against the Colts last week. For punishment, I'll watch 500 Peyton Manning commercials in order to remember how good he and his team are. The nice thing is that I can just serve the punishment by watching an NFL broadcast for a couple of hours.

CHARGERS over Chiefs: The Chiefs beat the defending Super Bowl champions the week after they got rid of Larry Johnson. The Bengals lost to the laughingstock of the NFL after acquiring Larry Johnson. There's no way KC beats the Chargers in San Diego, but I'm just sayin'.

Jaguars over 49ERS: Wait...the Jags are 6-4? They aren't actually good, are they? Doesn't it seem like they're 4-6? Oh wait, that's the Niners that are 4-6. My bad. I'll go with Jacksonville then.

RAVENS over Steelers: I had the Ravens winning this game before Big Ben was ruled out, so you best believe I'm picking the Ravens to usher in the Dennis Dixon Era with a victory over the banged-up champs.

SAINTS over Patriots: Great MNF game this week. Think this will be ESPN's second highest rated show ever, only behind Favregeddon? Lots of people are picking New England to win this one. Enough for me to stay away from joining them. If this was in New England I'd probably pick the Pats, but the Superdome may be a wee bit noisy come Monday evening.

Last week: 12-4

Season so far: 114-49 (including going 2-1 on Thanksgiving)

So 'Housh' Laughing Now?

ericj69 — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 19:27:05 -0000

More photos » by Ross Franklin - AP

"Dear God, please forgive me for choosing location and money over success and achievement. But I beg of you, can we never wear the neon-snot green jerseys again? We're already 3-6, isn't that punishment enough?"

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Good morning class. Today's word is schadenfreude. Can you say "schadenfreude"? (SHAH-den-froy-duh). Good!

Wikipedia, the Web-based bastion of infallible truth, defines schadenfreude as "pleasure derived from the misfortune of others."

You better believe that I'm currently enjoying a heaping spoonful of our word of the day when it comes to one Touraj Houshmandzadeh, Jr., better known as Seahawks wide receiver T.J. Houshmandzadeh.

My, how far we have come since early March. After Housh spent a couple of days toying with our emotions and eating free meals from our fanciest downtown steakhouses, he bolted for greener pastures. And by "greener", I mean this kind of green and this kind of green.

(Don't worry, I'll give you time to let your pupils readjust after seeing those neon-snot green monstrosities. You good? OK, let's continue.)

In the end, you can't blame a professional athlete for choosing a team that's offering more money and that's closer to home. But after it happened, Vikings fans were pretty bummed out about it. Take a look at my article and Gonzo's article--we were downright bitter and depressed. I even called T.J. a childish name (Housh-bag), which is totally out of character for me! (OK fine, so it isn't out of character. You got me.)

Now fast-forward to Week 11 of the 2009 NFL season. The Vikings are three games clear in the NFC North at 8-1. The Seahawks are three games behind the Arizona Cardinals at 3-6. Does all of this have to do with which team Houshmandzadeh joined? Of course not. But as Judd Zulgad intimated so well in his article earlier this week in the Star Tribune, Housh probably did the Vikings a favor by taking the money. If T.J. decided to set up shop in the Twin Cities, there's no way Minnesota drafts Percy Harvin, the overwhelming favorite to win Rookie of the Year honors. We probably would have taken someone like Michael Oher, who is doing just fine in Baltimore, but is he really doing much more than Phil Loadholt? Doubt it. I think Housh's decision set up the best possible draft for the Vikings, and it shows on the field this year.

When Houshandzadeh was with the Bengals, everyone assumed that he was he was the one good apple in a bushel of rotten ones. Popular opinion held that Housh just wanted to win, while teammates like Chad Ochocinco were more interested in jackassery. But after seeing Cincinnati flourish without him and T.J. already driving the waaahhhhhmbulance in Seattle, I'm not so sure.

But enough about Whosyourmomma--who's going to win on Sunday?

(More analysis and my Week 11 NFL picks after the jump.)

I sort of feel bad for Seattle lately. They had their basketball team ripped from the city by a greedy, heartless owner. Their baseball team has a huge payroll, but they haven't made the playoffs since 2001. It rains a lot. They're overpopulated with coffee-snob hipsters. And for the past two years, the injury report for their football team has been more crowded than the new Cowboys' Stadium "party plaza" on opening night.

I truly believe the Seahawks are a solid team, but they just can't stay healthy. Matt Hasselbeck is a great quarterback when he isn't fracturing various body parts. Their defense is solid when they aren't forced to start third stringers. Heck, even our old pal Nate Burleson has some good games from time to time. (But I'm still keeping Steve Hutchinson out of that poison pill battle, thankyouverymuch.)

That said, as it stands right now, I don't think even a solid, full-strength Seattle squad could beat this Vikings team in the Metrodome right now. The Vikings haven't actually put many complete games together this year, but the embarrassment of weapons they have always seem to do enough to win. I can see the 'Hawks keeping it close at first, but eventually a big play by one of our studs will break the game open. The only question is who will it be? A deep pass from Brett Favre to Sidney Rice? A huge kick return by Percy Harvin? A strip-sack by Jared Allen? A big play in the secondary from Antoine Winfield, who's slated to return on Sunday? A "no f---ing way did he just do that" run by Purple Jesus?

When you're asking who's going to make the big play rather than if you're going to make a big play, it's a good thing. Sorry Seattle. But hey, I hear Pearl Jam's new album is pretty good!

Prediction: Vikings 33, Seahawks 17

Here's the rest of my Week 11 NFL picks (home team in CAPS):

PANTHERS over Dolphins: I originally had the Fins here, but Ronnie Brown's injury really hurts them. You're high if you think Ricky Williams can smoke the defense by himself. Maybe if this was 2004, when Ricky was used to smoking all sorts of things by himself. Either way, I think the Panthers will be able to avoid passing more than Miami...because you do NOT want either of these teams passing very often.

RAVENS over Colts: I know, this pick doesn't make much sense, and I said I wouldn't go against the Colts or Saints until they lost. But the spread for this game opened as a pick 'em. How can a 9-0 team not be favored against a 5-4 team coming off a short week? I have no idea, but Vegas sure does. I'm going with Vegas on this one.

COWBOYS over Redskins: How can a coach of a 6-3 team be on the hot seat? Just take a look at the lowlights from the sh*t sandwich that Dallas turned in last week at Green Bay. One garbage time touchdown against a team that gave up 38 points to Tampa the week before?! I'm still going with the Cowboys here because Dan Snyder's Redskins obviously enjoy eating sh*t sandwiches.

LIONS over Browns: That's right boys and girls, the Lions have been favored TWICE this year!! Break out the champagne and confetti! Hopefully they don't screw this up again, like when they were favored against the Rams and handed them their only win of the season thus far. As for the Browns...if you ever watch "The Soup", this is the part where they'd show the Billy Bush clip simply saying "It's gross."

PACKERS over 49ers: Meh, who cares. We're 3-0 this season against these two piles of suck anyway.

JAGUARS over Bills: Congratulations to everyone who had Dick Jauron in their "first coach fired" pool. What I don't get is why Jauron said he was surprised. That's like being surprised that the serial killer that lived in your building was a "quiet guy that usually kept to himself".

Steelers over CHIEFS: The Steelers should really be concerned about their lack of pass protection. Luckily for Pittsburgh, the Chiefs have absolutely no semblance of a pass rush.

GIANTS over Falcons: No way the Giants lose coming off a bye week against a Turner-less Atlanta team. But if I'm wrong, let's hope Fox shows a ton of what my girlfriend likes to call the Eli Manning "Stupid Face":

The Eli Manning "Stupid Face". Making my girlfriend giggle since 2007.

Saints over BUCCANEERS: I feel a big "Oh really, you were concerned about me turning the ball over and putting up mediocre numbers the past few weeks? How's 400 yards and 4 TDs sound?" game from Drew Brees. Not like the Bucs can do much to stop Brees if he wants to have one of those games. (Please Drew, my 6-4 fantasy team on the edge of playoff contention implores you!)

Cardinals over RAMS: Another NFC West "thriller". Can you imagine the numbers Stephen Jackson would be putting up on even a mediocre team? He's having an outstanding year, and his team has to abandon the run by halftime most games. Speaking of Arizona, our buddy ArizonaVikingsFan sent me a nice Vikings picture he'd like posted. Apparently it's a "friend of a friend" of his on Facebook. Well AVF, you asked, and you shall receive:

Proof that the commenters make this site better. Thanks AVF!

Chargers over BRONCOS: That's nice that Denver is giving up their huge division lead to the Chargers earlier this year. Less stressful for both sides, don't you think? By the way, Kyle Orton got hurt the first game after he shaved his neckbeard. That was NOT a coincidence. Kyle, grow it back or suffer the consequences!

PATRIOTS over Jets: Oh you poor Jets. You're going to be the latest victim of a classic Bill Belichick "Eff You" game. The Titans will think they got off easy earlier this year. The Patriots might go for it on every fourth down and go for every two point conversion on Sunday. Then in the press conference, Belichick will say "how about you critics go suck on that" in his always-monotone voice and just walk off the stage.

Bengals over RAIDERS: Cincy's next 3 games: at Oakland, then home against Cleveland and Detroit. Are you ready for a world where the Bengals are 10-2? I know I'm not. Maybe "2012" should have been called "2009", because this is surely a sign of the apocalypse.

Eagles over BEARS: I wish the Bears could play every game on national television. They're 0-3 this year with everyone watching, and Jay Cutler has thrown ELEVEN interceptions in those three games. So um, yeah, I'm not going to pick the Bears here on a Sunday night game, regardless of how bad Philly has looked the past couple weeks.

Titans over TEXANS: Simple steps to victory for Tennessee: 1) Hand off to Chris Johnson. A lot. 2) When not handing off to Chris Johnson, throw to him in the flat. 3) Repeat steps 1 and 2 until time has expired.

Last week: 10-5

Season so far: 100-44

Grading the Defense: Arizona Cardinals vs. Seattle Seahawks

Hawkwind — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 17:30:11 -0000

More photos » by Paul Connors - AP

Arizona Cardinals safety Adrian Wilson does his best Superman impersonation while intercepting a shuffle pass from Seattle Seahawks quarterback Matt Hasselbeck during the final minutes of the Cardinals' 31-20 win. (AP Photo/Paul Connors)

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In what's becoming a bit of a trend, the Arizona Cardinals defense had some up and down moments throughout their game against the Seattle Seahawks. On the upside, they allowed just only 20 points but on the downside they gave up 472 yards of total offense to a unit that was averaging less than 340 yards per game. The defense also harrassed and sacked Matt Hasselbeck four times but allowed relatively unknown Justin Forsett to rush for over 120 yards. All in all thought the bottom line is that their effort was good enough to win and they made some very important plays when they needed to perserve the lead.

Rush Defense: What else can you really say? Forsett, a seventh round pick from a year ago with 20 career carries coming into the game, basically ripped up the Cardinals front seven from start to finish. In total he carried the ball 17 times, with six of those rushes going for at least ten yards. Since the Hawks didn't trail by two scores until the the latter half of the 4th quarter, they were able to keep the running game a factor for most of the game. In addition to Forsett's yardage the Hawks got another 41 yards on a combined seven carries from Julius Jones (who suffered a terrible injury), Louis Rankin and Matt Hasselbeck. In total they racked up 164 yards on the ground on 24 carries (a gaudy 6.8 ypc average) while only losing yards on two of those carries. The Cardinals rush defense has fallen to eighth in the league and with Stephen Jackson, Chris Johnson and Adrian Peterson coming in the next three weeks, they'll need a much better effort to stay inside the top ten.

Pass Defense: This might be a hard stance to defend but I think the Cardinals pass defense was at least decent on Sunday. Sure, Hasselbeck threw for over 300 yards but he also only completed 50% of his passes, threw more picks than touchdowns and had a QB rating under 60. Digging a little bit deeper, 84 of his 315 passing yards on the day came on two mistakes by Bryant McFadden, but more on that later. Most of Hasselbeck's game was limited to short passes, as evidence by his yard per attempt number of 6.1, and the pressure that the front seven was able to apply certainly had an influence on his performance. The overall yardage number is tough to ignore but considering that it took 52 pass attempts to barely break 300 yards, I'd still consider it a decent performance by the secondary.

McFadden's Tough Day: If there was one guy who had a tough day on Sunday, it was Bryant McFadden. He not only was personally responsible for the Hawks two biggest offensive plays but he also accounted for three penalties totaling 51 yards. The first big play allowed, a 53 yard pass to T.J. Houshmandzadeh, was simply a case of McFadden never finding the ball. By the time he turned his head to locate the ball, it was in Housh's hands and McFadden had to grab a handful of facemask to get him to the ground. It total the play moved the Hawks from their own one yard line to the Cardinals' 31 and they would score thier first touchdown five plays later. His next big mistake was a bit less obvious but head coach Ken Whisenhunt confirmed it yesterday during his press conference. On the Seahawks second touchdown the Cardinals secondary was in a "three deep" defense and it was McFadden's job to cover anyone who went deep on his side. Somehow though he overlooked John Carlson streaking down the seam and the pass ended up going for a 31 yard touchdown. Blown coverages are going to happen at every level of football but this combined with a couple more poor plays really highlighted a bad day at the office for McFadden.

Pinning the Seahawks Deep: One thing that I think has gotten overlooked so far is where the Seahawks had to start most of their drives and once you see this you may look at their yardage totals a bit differently. The Hawks had 13 drives in this game and their average starting field position was their own 19, but even that doesn't tell the whole story. Four of those 13 drives started inside the Hawks' five yard line, including back to back drives that started at their own one yard line, and nine of the 13 drives started at or inside their own 20. Pinning them that deep is a testament to not only Ben Graham and the Cardinals special team coverage units, but also the Cardinals offense. When the offense doesn't turn the ball over they take a tremendous amount of pressure off this defense and making an opposing offense drive the length of the field really helps the "bend but don't break" philosophy.

Honor Roll:

Will Davis: We haven't talked much about him even though there's a large segment of the Cardinal-fandom that lists OLB as our biggest need heading into next years draft, but Davis is playing really well. Officially he had just one tackle but if watch the tape he's starting to show up more and more. With Chike Okeafor sidelined with an injury, Davis was splitting time with Bertand Berry and he was able to pressure Hasselbeck a couple of times and looks fairly comfortable in his role at outside linebacker. All in all not a bad rookie season for our sixth round pick.

Clark Haggans: Perhaps the games's defensive MVP, Haggans registered two sacks and six total tackles. We didn't expect a great deal from him but so far he leads the team in sacks and is on pace for his best season since 2006.

Antrel Rolle: Somebody must be whispering in Rolle's ear about the possibility of big dollars in his future because Rolle is finally turning into a bona-fide playmaker. He once again led the team in tackles and his pick of Hasselbeck in the fourth quarter was the first of two nails in the Hawks' coffin.

Karlos Dansby and Darnell Dockett: I almost didn't want to list these guys considering that the Seahawks ran all over the Cardinals front seven but Dansby and Nine-0 were instumental in the pressuring of Hasselbeck. Dansby carried the load without Gerald Hayes in the lineup and finished with eight tackles and half a sack. Dockett registered half a sack as well and finished with six tackles of his own.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Considering the defense was missing two starters, I still look at this as a positive game for them as a whole. There are some aspects that can certainly be improved upon but overall I think this kind of effort/outcome gives this team a chance to win more often than not. Thoughts?

Poll

How would you grade the Arizona Cardinals defense?

A

5 votes

B

111 votes

C

136 votes

D

8 votes

F

9 votes

269 votes | Poll has closed

Seattle Seahawks Wither; Fall 31 - 20 to the Arizona Cardinals

John Morgan — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 01:25:25 -0000

by Matt York - AP

Greg Knapp achieved offense with surprise.

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This was an heroic effort and exciting football. Arizona is pretty good this year. Standing at 6-3, the Cardinals should surpass ten wins. Seattle tore out to an early lead, but the defense crumbled against a sustained Arizona attack. Seattle was beat because it was the inferior football team. The Cards had thirteen meaningful drives and averaged 35.8 yards a drive.

There's a lot of game balls to give out, but first let's discuss some of Seattle's weaknesses. Sean Locklear looked a bit gimpy between snaps, so perhaps he is not fully healed. However Locklear is chipping away at his chance to stick at left tackle. Seattle faces an interesting dilemma with Lock. He could be a great right tackle in Greg Knapp's system, but even without the left tackle incentives, he is expensive for a right tackle. Seattle owns a fabulously cheap offensive line, so perhaps it could afford to pay Locklear well at right tackle.

Matt Hasselbeck had a hard game. Heroic is a great way to describe his play. A hero is someone that gets other people killed. Joss Whedon did not envision Hasselbeck's high pass to Deon Butler, but I did upon quoting him. There are many things Hasselbeck still does well. To build a good to elite offense around him, something Seattle would need to do to have a realistic chance at winning the Super Bowl, would require a massive investment. A more massive investment. Seattle has already sunk much of its cap into Beck, Walter Jones, Deion Branch and T.J. Houshmandzadeh. The Objectivist is wonderfully free of Kyle Orton moments. Because Matt Hasselbeck can consistently make the right read and throw with accuracy, he can make an offense out of check downs. But it's a shit offense. And the second his reads are wrong or his accuracy flutters, it completely breaks down.

Seattle had very little chance to recover when it lost the lead. It does not have what Arizona has: A repeatable ability to gain big chunks of yards in one play. But it shouldn't have lost the lead. Seattle did exactly what it needed to: punch the Cardinals in the mouth early and force Warner to consistently face thick zones. The defense did not crumble because any one player played poorly, but because now it does not have a single great pass rusher. The defense Seattle wants to run needs someone to make Brandon Mebane's almost-snaply pistoning into the backfield and crushing the front of the pocket matter. It needs someone to keep the tight end away from Darryl Tapp. It needs a better edge rusher than Aaron Curry. It lacks that and it failed to sack Warner once.

Game Balls:

Justin Forsett: Kid showed up and declared his an NFL player. Force showed quick feet in his cuts, power in the hole and the less recognized ability to run under tackles and through smaller holes. I don't believe in a feature back. So I am not calling for Forsett to get the majority of the carries, but he is no longer a specialty back. Force is a first and ten, I-formation back.

ME!BANE!: Said. Done. Master of the midway.

Darryl Tapp: Tapp is hybrid end-linebacker. His ability against the run is that of a linebacker, but he's a pure edge-rushing defensive end. Keep this guy and enjoy how he ages.

Josh Wilson: Who would think Wilson would look like the best cover corner Seattle had today? Pistol isn't too good at that, actually, but small samples may contain outliers. He needs to be facing the quarterback to be his best and the game plan to man up the Cardinals defenders and hope they can buy the pass rush time stopped working in the second. Wilson recovered well, showed some man ability and kept overall his guy close, boosting his campaign for starting right corner. He wasn't great, but he was good at something he doesn't do and against the league's best wide receiver corps.

Greg Knapp: It took some balls to swallow your assumptions and let Forsett run real runs. He also called a very nice game. Early, Seattle attacked with a suddenly successful rush game, and punctuated their Two-Headed Freak with a mid-range aerial assault. He saved the screens for desperation time in the fourth. It's hard planning around an injury wracked quarterback with fading arm strength that plays behind a piecemeal line, but Knapp squeezes production out of this offense with a mix of good timing and good play calling.

That's it folks. Seattle is no longer in the hunt to win the division. If it keeps up this intensity, it will enter the Wild Card chase, but only in a fanboy sense. Field Gulls is switching gears again. Like last year, the tape review will now focus on players key to Seattle's future. This week: Sean Locklear at left tackle and Brandon Mebane at the three.

Seattle Seahawks at Arizona Cardinals Game Thread 3

John Morgan — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 23:09:15 -0000

Seattle destroyed the Cardinals Death Star.

Seahawks are shocked that John Marshall is Gus Bradley's father.

Justin Forsett destroys the Cardinals shield station; T.J. Houshmandzadeh destroys their second Death Star; Marshall lifts and drops Ken Whisenhunt into U of Phoenix reactor shaft?

Who Would You Take from the Seattle Seahawks?

Andrew602 — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 18:26:44 -0000

by Elaine Thompson - AP

Aaron Curry on the Cardinals defense would provide linebacker stability for a long time.

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The Seattle Seahawks record(3-5) doesn't speak volumes from their team, as they do have talent if you look in the right places. This week, you can pick who you would want to be a member of the Arizona Cardinals. It can be a young or new player, a starter or back up, etc. You can also take their current contract status into consideration, as if we were actually signing the player. Also look at who may be leaving our team after this season. This one may be difficult considering they're a division rival but when it all comes down to it, it's for the betterment of the team. So with that being said, here's some picks I would make from the Seahawks.

Aaron Curry - This has to be one of the easiest picks, as Curry's only in his rookie season and has played very well so far. He will develop into a leader on the defense, and has a wide enough skill set to blitz, stop the run, or drop in coverage. Should one of our aging linebackers(Okeafor, Berry, Haggens) leave or retire, Curry would be a great replacement.

John Carlson - Carlson would be one of the best additions to the Cardinals offense. We currently are without a clear cut starting tight end, and Carlson would solve that problem. He would add another target to the already dangerous offense, and provide solid blocking along the offensive line.

Lofa Tatupu - Although Lofa hasn't had a productive year since he was sent to the pro bowl in 2007, he's still one of the best inside linebackers in the league. He's a passionate defender and improves the players around him. If Karlos Dansby does leave for a bigger contract next year, the defense would be fine with Tatupu in the middle.

Brandon Mebane - Membane has slowly become a force at defensive tackle since he arived in the league in 2007. He's underrated but can play the run and get enough pressure on the opposing quarterback, evidence being his 5.5 sacks last year. Bryan Robinson is near the end of his career and we don't know enough about Gabe Watson or Alan Branch just yet.

That's it for my list, and as you can see, defense is where I was leaning. The Hawks have good receivers in T.J. Houshmandzadeh and Nate Burleson, but they wouldn't be an improvement over the Cardinals receivers now. Matt Hasselbeck and Julius Jones also wouldn't be a step forward from where we're currently at. Their offensive line is rarely healthy and needs to be revamped. Who would you take from the Seattle Seahawks and why?

From Zero to Seven

John Morgan — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 00:27:29 -0000

More photos » by Ted S. Warren - AP

Jordan Babineaux sacked Matthew Stafford to force third and 20. Seattle's slack zones allowed Stafford to connect with Brandon Pettigrew for 18 on the next play. Detroit easily converted the fourth and two.

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Seattle allowed Brandon Pettigrew to receive for 18 before Detroit converted the fourth two different ways. By the official scorer's spot, Kevin Smith ran for three to convert fourth and two. The play was ruled dead because the Seahawks had too many men on the field.

I say Seattle allowed Pettigrew to receive for 18 because that is how the zone was constructed. Jordan Babineaux had perfectly timed a delayed blitz and broke down to sack Matthew Stafford for ten. Seattle then went soft. It dropped a loose zone and rushed four. Seahawks defended the first down marker and opened the underneath. Aaron Curry seemingly knocked Pettigrew another three yards over the marker and for the first.

The ball was marked at the Seattle 29. The Lions raced to the line of scrimmage and snapped before Seattle could set, simultaneously converting the first on the ground and forcing the penalty to convert the first. I guess Seattle couldn't fathom a team going for it on fourth and two.

Jason Hanson missed the field goal attempt, but a play later, Detriot would have the ball again.

Seattle had given itself a big thumbs up to the eye socket. Brandon Mebane had blown up their first run attempt in the backfield. Curry had hit Stafford twice and Babineaux had sacked him for a loss of ten. It had forced three third and longs and allowed two conversions - the unconverted third picked up on fourth down. It attacked and retreated for 14 plays, 16 unofficial, and was spared by dumb luck.

In the jubilant arms of fortune, it threw the ball right back to Detroit.

Matt Hasselbeck passed into triple cover or, more accurately, at single cover. He threw it to Louis Delmas and broke to tackle Delmas before he could score. Hasselbeck didn't see Delmas but Delmas saw him. Looking down T.J. Houshmandzadeh and patting the ball once before firing.

Craig Terrill fired into the right tackle and Cory Redding came untouched from left end on a five man line. Redding hit Smith in the backfield and forced a fumble, but the play was ruled dead. Pettigrew had committed a false start. Pettigrew ran between Seattle's zone and Stafford hit him as he turned in a play that looked indefensible. Stafford's pass was too fast and Pettigrew too large for Seattle's zones to factor.

Seattle had played well but was down seven. It could have been down 10. The Seahawks were executing. Why then were they reeling? Hasselbeck bears the brunt: He made an indefensible pass. But that touchdown reception - rookie to rookie - that looked unstoppable -- what explains that? The 18 yard reception that preceded it, that didn't contest the pass and set up a makeable fourth, what explains that? If zones can make routine plays look unstoppable, maybe it is the defensive game plan that is truly indefensible.