Tom Sestito is a guy who plays in the NHL, apparently, and on Tuesday night he beat the Tampa Bay Lightning.
Tom Sestito is unstoppable. He's like a truck with no brakes, or a bus that also doesn't have any brakes, or maybe even a train also bereft of brakes.
The point is you can't stop him, so don't even try. Just get out of the way, and go tell the police that someone is wandering around town stealing brakes from vehicles.
Tom Sestito has been in the NHL since 2007, and has played 28 games. He spent most of his career being not quite good enough to earn a permanent spot on the Columbus Blue Jackets. On Tuesday night he single-handedly outscored the Tampa Bay Lightning.
Here's his first goal...
And the game winner...
That's all it took for the Flyers to edge the Lightning, as the game finished 2-1. Sestito, who prior to Tuesday night had scored two total NHL goals, is sure to become a hot property in fantasy hockey for dumb, desperate and impulsive team managers everywhere.