Fiorentina Vs. Juventus: Wanted -- 90 Minutes Of Life Back

I swear that Fox Soccer did not show the match between Fiorentina and Juventus this morning. Instead, the station showed an endless loop of the same two or three scenes. Adrian Mutu racing into the Juventus area, only to send a shot high and wide. Alessandro Del Piero playing the ball in to Claudio Marchisio, who can't control it well enough to threaten Artur Boruc. Riccardo Montolivo falling over. Perhaps Fox lost the tape of the real match?

That was the match in a nutshell, so how about some random observations that might be slightly more interesting than anything involving the play in Florence?

  • Felipe Melo needs some longer shorts. Yes, I get it, footballing quads are lovely. But give us a hint rather than show us the entire package, y'know?
  • If a player goes down in the area and refuses to get up despite the fact that his team continue to have possession, and then manages to get up after play has stopped, that player's team gets to kick him repeatedly in the shins. I'm looking at you, Alberto Gilardino.
  • "Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's Maybelline." Alessandro Matri might have the longest eyelashes known to man (or woman) kind, but that certainly doesn't mean he has enough brains to remember to stay onside.
  • A universal truth: when Sunday at 6am my time (16:00 Italy time) rolls around, I will inevitably choose the most boring match available, leading me to contemplate things such as, "Why do the purple kits make me feel affection to Fiorentina, but pink ones don't make me like Palermo?"
  • Please, someone, pass me a time turner so I can have those 90 minutes back.
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